Sorry, but a chain of violent thunderstorms rolling through here has the little guy totally spooked. In fact, the last I saw him he was guzzling coconut rum and fixing to sacrifice a chicken so that he might “appease the angry sky gods.”
Of course, all he has to work with is half a Boston Market roaster and a plastic butter knife, so I don’t suspect he’ll be able to make too much of a mess…
’Fixing to’… that’s awesome. I catch yankee shit because that phrase is largely attributed to southerners.
Your diversity knows no bounds, Jeff.
Never underestimate the power of an armadillo during his jihad.
It’s your thang, do what you wanna do….
I DEMAND Friday night cat, er I mean Armadillo, pictures.
Jeff is the most Southern Jooooooooooooo I have ever met.
mmmmmm………coconut rum……….
In fact, the last I saw him he was guzzling coconut rum…
I had no idea that the armadillo was gay.
I dont think barbequed Chicken was what the gods had in mind when they demanded a burnt offering… but chicken does sound damn good.. I wonder if Popeye’s is open yet ?
… It just occurred to me .. If Cain would have used the brain God gave him and offered up some good BBQ as a burnt offering.. like maybe some Babyback Pork Ribs, meat falling off the bone, smothered in a sweet but tangey spicey honey homemade BBQ Sauce (The no pork thing didnt come around til later.. Apples were the big no-no at that time)… Maybe some Tater Salad & Red Beans & Rice on the side…and an icey cold beer.. instead of a bunch of lame raw vegetables (that no doubt offended The Lord by implying he was/is a Vegan).. We might all be living in the Garden of Eden right now, working on our tans and having guilt free sexual trysts… Stupid , stupid Cain…
i figured he wouldn’t dance.
do you think an armadillo shaped soup turine would motivate him? cause i know where to get one. cheap.
Something about Fridays. The pressure just gets to him, I think.
Its probably their new ”Grilled Armadillo Steak with Garlic Butter” special ..That’d freak any Armadillo out.. If you’d feed him more often at home he wouldnt have to eat out so much.. Either cook for him or tell him to try Chili’s or Applebee’s instead…
Turing word: food
no shit
While in the musical instrument exhibit at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in NYC, I saw a guitar-esque instrument which had been made out of an armadillo.
Just thought I’d share.