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“Boehner: ‘We don’t have a tea party caucus to speak of in the House’”

I have a dream:  and it involves a rocket ship, a tanning bed, John Boehner, Karl Rove, and about a half-dozen honey badgers.

I know.  It’s wrong.  And yet it feels so right.

 

 

39 Replies to ““Boehner: ‘We don’t have a tea party caucus to speak of in the House’””

  1. McGehee says:

    There’s gotta be something in the D.C. water supply.

  2. JHoward says:

    It’s like a wish come true!

    Actually, it’s like a wish come true. And it’s fucking time to see it for what it is.

  3. BigBangHunter says:

    – The ‘new’ face of the Dem party. “Hey, they didn’t say I’d have to like, you know, do stuff and know stuff. How gosh.”

  4. I Callahan says:

    The next sentence changes the entire context:

    “All of us who were elected in 2010 were supported by the tea party.”

  5. Ernst Schreiber says:

    The Beltway Republicans are killing us.

  6. eCurmudgeon says:

    There’s gotta be something in the D.C. water supply.

    And yet one more reason why we need to phase out the District of Columbia in favor of a decentralized, distributed capital.

    Move the House, Senate, Supreme Court, Executive Offices, Pentagon, etc. to separate cities, each at least 500 miles apart and 250 miles inland. Better still, require that legislators operate “virtually” from offices in their respective state capitols. While we’re at it, repeal the 17th Amendment.

    This all boils down to a fundamental question: Is the “United States of America” a plural, or singular?

  7. William says:

    Which means that they trust the GOP to be GO-Great, I Callahan.

    Not that we all stayed home and our preparing for the collapse of our country, which is closer to the actual truth.

  8. sdferr says:

    “There’s gotta be something in the D.C. water supply.”

    It’s the high priced Scotch in the Capitol Hill pubs.

  9. JHoward says:

    How do we do that, eCurmudgeon?

  10. Ernst Schreiber says:

    It’s becoming increasingly hard to deny that the reason these guys dismiss the party faithful as irredeemably stupid and embrassing is because those irredeemable embarrassments continue to vote for them.

  11. BigBangHunter says:

    How do we do that, eCurmudgeon?

    – The harsh realities of our plite will take care of things, its just a matter of time now.

    – Remember, its all going to come to fruition on Dec. 21st when, as one new age numbnuts put it last night on coast to coast from the bridge of the Mother ship:

    “The coming grandure will usher in a new beggining for all mankind when we are finally released from the bomds that were put on us some 26,000 years ago, when the evil minded extra terrestrial greys, and Reptilians, and Astralians came to Earth and destroyed the mighty Nation state of Atlantis, killing all 56 million in habitants and since then attacking us and changing our DNA with vapor trails and GMO’s and impure underarm deoderants from the factories deep underground. All of that will change now that the Alurians have come as our higher astral plane brothers to destroy the evils and raise us up to our godhead rightful place in the Galactic Confederacy, finally wiping out the powers. the Vatican, the project 21er’s, the Globalists, and Illumenatti, the greenies and the tall whites, the scientologists, and all the rest, that have held us back from true enlightenment and a realization of our proper destiny.”

    (T-shirts and paraphenalia are available in the conference hall front lobby.)

    – I am so looking forward to my birthday this year.

  12. McGehee says:

    Better still, require that legislators operate “virtually” from offices in their respective state capitols.

    No. District offices. If they gather in their state capitols they’ll be able to collude among their in-state colleagues face-to-face, whereas if their only contact is electronic it can be subject to draconian transparency requirements.

  13. McGehee says:

    …since we’re wishing…

  14. eCurmudgeon says:

    No. District offices. If they gather in their state capitols they’ll be able to collude among their in-state colleagues face-to-face, whereas if their only contact is electronic it can be subject to draconian transparency requirements.

    I don’t necessarily disagree, but was trying to minimize expenses of having to relocate network connections and conferencing gear after each election.

    And, besides, some face-to-face interaction is going to happen, and is probably necessary from time to time in any case.

  15. eCurmudgeon says:

    (T-shirts and paraphenalia are available in the conference hall front lobby.)

    I saw an advertisement in the local alt-weekly rag that the “I’m not saying it was aliens. But it was aliens.” guy is going to be in Denver on the 11th. I’m half-tempted to attend out of morbid curiosity…

  16. eCurmudgeon says:

    I saw an advertisement in the local alt-weekly rag that the “I’m not saying it was aliens. But it was aliens.” guy is going to be in Denver on the 11th.

    Never mind. It was the 1st. I stand corrected.

  17. mojo says:

    Bawlin’ Boner, straight up.

  18. EBL says:

    I am all for a Hunger Games where we put guys like Boehner, Blooomberg and Christie on an island and watch them fight it out. My guess remains that Christie kills and devours them all, then dies of terminal smugness.

  19. DarthLevin says:

    The missus asked me to look into moving to Costa Rica.

    I don’t know what’s scarier, that she asked me or that I’m actually considering it.

    She’s also modified Boehner’s title from “Honorable” to “that mewling little pussy”. I can definitely get on board with that.

  20. eCurmudgeon says:

    I am all for a Hunger Games where we put guys like Boehner, Blooomberg and Christie on an island and watch them fight it out.

    Thunderdome. With the Pay-Per-View revenues used to offset the debt.

  21. Ernst Schreiber says:

    First prize is a night with Hillary Clinton.

    Second prize is a night with Michele Obama.

  22. BigBangHunter says:

    – They have another conference in LA sometime this month.

    – Theres a story going around about a 43 trillion dollar lawsuit that was filed in Fed court yesterday that names Bumblefuck, Bernenke, Holder, and about 25 others in the administration. Yes, you read that right, 43 trillion.

    – Even more interesting you might recall the story of that nanny that supposidly killed the two kids last week and then commited suicide.

    – Whats interesting about that? Well it seems that the kids daddy is the lead editor for the WSJ, the news org that broke the original story, amd that theres firm indications she was murdered, which brings in to question whether she did the deed at all.

    – Moreover the killings occured about the same time as the law suit article appeared, and the post was taken down a few hours later, and theres been not a peep in the press since.

  23. paulzummo says:

    “There’s gotta be something in the D.C. water supply.”

    At about 11:30 on Tuesday evening I had an epiphany: I have got to get the hell out of this place (DC). Texas, here I come.

    I just need to find a job there.

  24. dicentra says:

    WAIT wait wait wait wait:

    There is no tea party caucus independent of the Republican caucus in the House of Representatives, Speaker of the House John Boehner said Thursday in an interview with ABC’s Diane Sawyer. …

    “Well, listen, I think this has been the most misreported story of my two years’ tenure,” Boehner replied. “We don’t have a tea party caucus to speak of in the House. All of us who were elected in 2010 were supported by the tea party.”

    It sounds like he’s saying that there’s no separate entity called the tea party caucus. “We’re all the tea party caucus now,” in other words.

    Doesn’t mean they’ll all actually represent the tea party, mind. However, that quote was taken out of context (by just about everyone), and given what Boehner’s been saying and doing lately, it was just too plausible to check.

  25. Ernst Schreiber says:

    What he’s saying is that there’s nobody in the House who ran on the Tea Party ticket.

    The inferrence I draw from that is the opposite of yours.

  26. dicentra says:

    All of us who were elected in 2010 were supported by the tea party.

    All of us? That implies uniformity of support, not a separate group with tea party support.

    Either way, he won’t do right by us.

  27. dicentra says:

    You guys aren’t missing #StarWarsFiscalCliff, are you? It is truly the best hashtag EVAR.

  28. Jeff G. says:

    Doesn’t mean they’ll all actually represent the tea party, mind. However, that quote was taken out of context (by just about everyone), and given what Boehner’s been saying and doing lately, it was just too plausible to check.

    Nope, I checked it. He’s trying to disavow the fracture in the Republican caucus and note that he’s the fucking leader, full stop.

    He’s most definitely NOT saying we’re all the tea party caucus now. In fact, he’s saying the opposite: we’re all going to get our asses in line behind me, and those who don’t were sent a message this election season, with the GOP withholding campaign support and the like.

  29. McGehee says:

    I don’t necessarily disagree, but was trying to minimize expenses of having to relocate network connections and conferencing gear after each election.

    When my current congressman was elected, I believe he started out using the same office space as his (fellow Republican) predecessor. FWIW.

    Anyway with broadband intenet and VPN there’s really not all that much hardware required.

  30. McGehee says:

    he’s the fucking leader, full stop.

    I wouldn’t mind a full stop to the getting fucked, but if that happened it would prove Weepy’s not the leader anymore.

  31. palaeomerus says:

    “First prize is a night with Hillary Clinton.
    Second prize is a night with Michele Obama.”

    Third prize is five nights with Hillary Clinton
    Second prize is one night with Hillary Clinto
    First prize, no nights with Hlllary Clinton, they just let you go home.

    Grand Prize an expensive overseas vacation for Michele Obama which you can follow via pictures on her tumblr page.

  32. palaeomerus says:

    The prizes here are offered in the spirit of the sales contest in Glengarry Glenross.

  33. leigh says:

    Coffee is for closers ONLY.

  34. leigh says:

    Don Obama: I understand. You found paradise in the House of Representatives, you had a good trade, you made a good living. The Republican party protected you and there was Fox News. And you didn’t need a friend like me. But, now you come to me, and you say: “Barack, give me a tax cut.” But you don’t ask with respect. You don’t offer friendship. You don’t even think to call me Godfather. Instead, you come into my house, on the day of my historic re-election and you ask me to do this for you.

    John Boehner: I ask for justice.

    Don Obama: That is not justice. The rich can afford a little more.

    John Boehner: How much shall I pay you?

    Don Obama: Boehner, Boehner. What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully? If you’d come to me in friendship, then this debt ceiling fight would have ended this very day. And if by chance an honest man like yourself should make enemies in your party, then they would become my enemies. And then they would fear you.

    John Boehner: Be my friend – Godfather. [Boehner sheds a tear, bows toward the Barack and kisses the Barack’s hand. Don Obama: Good. Someday, and that day may never come, I’ll call upon you to do a service for me: perhaps comprehensive immigration reform. But until that day – accept this justice as a gift on my historic re-election day.

    Honest to Pete, these two deserve each other. Weepy little girly men.

  35. Ernst Schreiber says:

    Obama isn’t as smart as the Godfather though. He’d cross Boehner the first chance he got. Don Corleone knew better.

  36. leigh says:

    Obama is more like Fredo. A luckier Fredo, but Fredo none the less.

  37. Ernst Schreiber says:

    Obama is Tattaglia.

    Mitt Romney is starting to look a bit like Fredo though.

  38. leigh says:

    True enough.

  39. John Bradley says:

    So… fishin’ trip?

Comments are closed.