Fact: if you drank a half-bottle of cherry Nyquil and ate through an entire 3.78 liter ziploc bag filled with Psilocybe mexicana (which poorly-hidden bag contained the remainder of my stash, mind you), you’d be in no condition to dance, either.
And that’s before I beat you quite savagely with the thickened end of a broomstick.
You can’t dance to Pink Floyd anyway.
Have you thought of putting the annoying little shit up for adoption? Perhaps to the youth in Asia?
I think Martha’s staff of able recipe researchers would be glad to take care of him for you.
You can’t dance to Pink Floyd anyway.
Not vertically, anyway.
You know, oddly enough I have drunk a half-bottle of cherry Nyquil and eaten through an entire 3.78 liter ziploc bag filled with Psilocybe mexicana….at least I think I ate through the bag…wow, maybe that was something else entirely…..
And the new Dusty girl’s tits are quite pouty and perky. Then again, she is holding up her arms.
hmmm, if i had half a bottle of cherry nyquil, i probably wouldn’t stop dancing for a couple days.
Sheesh, what a bunch of pantywaists. Try chewing a whole blotter sheet of acid, robbing a methadone clinic at gunpoint, taking God knows how much trucker speed, and chugging a couple mason jars of white lightning–all before 10 a.m.
Half a bottle of NyQuil and some ‘shrooms…I guess that’ll impress the tourists.
Jesus, I miss college.
In lieu of an armadillo, I offer dancing lions (and tigers).
Do NOT watch this while high on grass, or you will never stop staring at it.
OH GAWWWWDD MAKE IT STOP !!! PLEEEEEASE !!!
I just drank a half bottle of generic Safeway cherry Nyquil and I didnt have any ‘shrooms left so I did a few hits of E (and gave a few to my dancin pet growling rabbit as well).. then I ran into that damned Kenya song from Heeellll!!
Now I’m dancin that Maasi courting dance I saw on National Geographic Explorer with 25 glow rings around my neck and wrists.. cant stop.. and my rabbit’s been humping a throw pill for what seems like hours.. and I’m still higher than a baboon huffing benzene.. no end in sight.. Oh gawwwdd someone shoot me .. pleeease.. I beg you!!
Kenya… Oh, Kenya… Where the Giraffes are… and the Bears are… Oh Kenya.. Kenya, Kenya, Kenya……………..
ple-e-e-eaasssseeee make it stop…..
Don’t forget to read the script on that video. I like the significance of the orange line between Kenya and Norway.
Try chewing a whole blotter sheet of acid, robbing a methadone clinic at gunpoint, taking God knows how much trucker speed, and chugging a couple mason jars of white lightning–all before 10 a.m.
Psshhh! A freshman chemistry experiment.
Hahaha That Kenya Video is priceless.. I havent laughed that hard in a while..(thanks to Beck) Is that used to promote Kenya Tourism or what? (well, probably not tourists from Norway)Its advertising genius.. just pray that The Gap never gets hold of it.
Hey.. I didnt see any Monkeys or Apes in that video.. Where were the freakin’ baboons ?!! Oh, I see .. Baboons arent good enough to be in the video, huh? We dont dance well enough..huh? Were a little too dark and hairy, huh? Once again the felinocentrics simiophobes just piss all over the monkeys and no one says shit.. So where’s the glorious ACLU in protecting our rights? I guess if youre not a godless liberal freak you dont rate their help.
-AB
Turing word: give
oh ya.. I got somthing I’ll give you baby..
Exactly how do you thicken the end of a broomstick?
Do I really want to know?
Depends.
He’s nothing if not a giver.
Speaking of funny videos, don’t miss the one I linked to on the microwave thread. (It’s all the rage at my daughter’s middle school)
Can you loan that broomstick to Atlanta police so they can beat the everliving out of Brian Nichols or whatever his name is? I think they’ve either caught him or it’s a hostage situation in a ‘burb.
Jeff, Dont dick around and lose that broomstick…. W is going to need it back sooner rather than later.. Iran is fairly begging for a sound thrashing.. and I’m thinking W has realized that someone has ’borrowed‘ his broomstick.. I saw some pictures of him checking behind the door in the oval office.. and under the couch and even in that little room thats been closed off for decontamination for years now where only Bill’s cigar had ‘sex’.. He’ll be calling you to give it back soon.. just a heads up..
Turing word: heard
As in: W heard you were beating your Aardvark with his special ass beating broomstick and he aint happy about it.
Armadillo ? You ever see an Aardvark? Same thing..
Aardvarks don’t moon walk. Dude.
Aardvarks also don’t dance, and they don’t do hits off a beer bong. Jack Daniels straight or nothing.
True story.
But they can eat some ants.
Maybe they dance when they eat fire ants.
naw.. only if the aforementioned ‘fire ants’ get into their pants.
Don’t let the aardvark find Andy of World Wide Ants. It could be ugly.
I must be way behind the times, but I’ve never heard it called “beating your aardvark.”
Or Adam Ant.
Yeah, Gail, that’s what the kids are calling it these days.
Crazy kids.
I think the proper terms are ‘Flogging your Aardvark’ or ‘Beating your Behemoth’ (popular among evangelical Christians in the midwestern United States). You see in actuality I’m a linguistic anthropologist doing my doctoral thesis on metaphors for masturbation among the Christian Fascist Right Wing Bush Bootlickers, so naturally I’ve come to Protein Wisdom to observe .. Where else would one go to find so many red state, right wing Republican ‘cultural elite’ stroking off at the same time ? Feel free to contribute any other particularly colorful terms you might know.
Now go back to your stroking and just pretend I’m not here..
Regards,
Stewart Pudpuller, MA, BA
Anthropolgy Department
University of California, Berkley
How about “trolling”? Be sure and add that one to your lexicon.
Stewie isn’t a troll, he’s an effing MONKEY.
But then who would have a better perspective on anthropology than a fellow primate?
There’s no fooling you Gail..
but am I a man dreaming I’m a baboon..
or a baboon dreaming I’m a man ?