I am not now, nor have I ever been, a member of the Communist Party.  So, should you ever hear me say something like, “dude, you gonna smoke that whole thing yourself?—or do you plan on maybe sharing the wealth?”—rest assured that I have never taken money from pinko groups, nor am I in favor of “progressive” policy initiatives that seek to redistribute income. 

I’m just kinda broke, is all.*

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update:  Tim Worstall weighs in.

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update 2:  John from WuzzaDem comes clean here.

And not to get all “wow, the mysteries of the world are like, so mysterious, y’know” on you, but I really did have Taco Bell for dinner just now. 

Spooky.