update: and not just Leather Pat, either. Should Vanilla Pat want to press those white vinyls on my throat and make me bark like a dog, I’m afraid I’m at his mercy.
I find if I drink an atrocious amount of beer and spend the afternoon drooling on the couch watching playoff games I can subdue my “Pat” voices to managable levels.
Give it a shot, what the hell. Unless your couch is white patent leather, which may drive you to permanent madness. Or Jesus, which for some, sadly, is one and the same…
– Hmmm…. Pat Boone seems so apropos for a Sunday…Well for sure if you live in Utah and have an eye on your neighboors daughter… I need some more “midnight” milky ways…and a Chalupa…and a marquarita…. Wonder if she got back from Tiauana yet…. Todays secret word is “Ill”….can you say Ill and use it in a sentence kids….
Sisters Loretta Lynn and Crystal Gale are my cousins but I have no problem making jokes about Kentucky and I don’t really want to hear relentless renditions of “I’m a Coal Miner’s Daughter” at any of the inaugural soirees.
My cousin Charles has something like 24,000 people on his geneology charts (heck, you have family living in the same place for over 200 years, you find lots of records)… so I haven’t done a lot of poking through all of it…but just did…
However, Pat Boone claims to be a direct descendent of Daniel Boone who is my 1st cousin 8 times removed.
Pat Boone, I met him in Australia when I was a kid. He was involved with some guys that tossed my dad out a ten story window. Read the book ‘The Crimes Of Patriiots’. Pat Boone is on page 81-82, 83,88.
I liked Pat’s strawberry wine when I was in like the 7th grade… I could get 7th grade girls to drink it.. That was before I discovered vodka in Hawaiian Punch of course..
I find if I drink an atrocious amount of beer and spend the afternoon drooling on the couch watching playoff games I can subdue my “Pat” voices to managable levels.
Give it a shot, what the hell. Unless your couch is white patent leather, which may drive you to permanent madness. Or Jesus, which for some, sadly, is one and the same…
I said I was gonna hurt you for that one. And I will. I know your in Colorado. It won’t take much to get an address.
Be afraid. Very afraid.
P.S. My first thought is to drug you and have “PAT BOONE IS MY MASTER” tattooed on you bicep. Yep. That’s my plan.
Um, I already have that tattooed on my thigh.
Howsabout Debbie Boone’s “You Light Up My Life” lyrics across my chest. That would be cool.
Jeff, just make sure you get them tattooed backwards so you can read them in the mirror. I’ve screwed that up before…
I should have known you might enjoy that. Ok, then “I ‘heart’ Jerry Falwell” across the butt.
I’ll invite the gang here to watch. WHAT FUN!
He’ll be looking like “Memento” guy at this rate.
I have often wondered what is tattooed on Mickey Rooney’s butt. Now I guess we’ll NEVER KNOW.
Just back from mass and already doing the devil’s work…
RWS – Can’t you just turn the other cheek?
But doesn’t Pat consider having a tattoo to be sinful?
– Hmmm…. Pat Boone seems so apropos for a Sunday…Well for sure if you live in Utah and have an eye on your neighboors daughter… I need some more “midnight” milky ways…and a Chalupa…and a marquarita…. Wonder if she got back from Tiauana yet…. Todays secret word is “Ill”….can you say Ill and use it in a sentence kids….
*packing my web cam*
Pat Boone may be your master,
But Tony Orlando and Dawn are my co-pilots.
Yellow ribbons anyone?
Pat Boone is only the right hand of power. The man who wields the power is Troy Cory.
Do not go there. Really, don’t.
Scott Baio is the Bunny Overlord. Who is this Pat Boone pretender??
Two words: CHRISTY LANE.
“I’m only human,
I am a woman…”
“One set of footprints
Lord you promised me
You’d hold my hand…”
“I believe in angels
Something good in everything they do…”
I think it’s time to turn off Fox News for a while now. The commercials are killing me.
NOT TO PUT TOO FINE A POINT ON IT, BUT IS YOUR MASTER THE PRE-OR-POST “IN A METAL MOOD – NO MORE MR. NICE GUY,” HEAVY METAL ALBUM PAT BOONE?
I JUST READ THE UPDATE! NEVER MIND!
Hey, I am related to him, so stop it!
Two words: Moody River.
PETER RIEGERT IS MY MASTER!
Boone & Katie, Together 4 Ever
Scott B
Sisters Loretta Lynn and Crystal Gale are my cousins but I have no problem making jokes about Kentucky and I don’t really want to hear relentless renditions of “I’m a Coal Miner’s Daughter” at any of the inaugural soirees.
Scott (Boone)–I always knew there was something strange about you!
Yikes, ScottB
My cousin Charles has something like 24,000 people on his geneology charts (heck, you have family living in the same place for over 200 years, you find lots of records)… so I haven’t done a lot of poking through all of it…but just did…
However, Pat Boone claims to be a direct descendent of Daniel Boone who is my 1st cousin 8 times removed.
Scott!! We’re cousins!
Ok, this is starting to sound like a Mississippi family reunion, and we all know how creepy those can get.
RWS
What was that Jeff Foxworthy line?
You know you’re a redneck if you look upon a family reunion as a great dating opportunity…
Of course, there’s always this.
Could someone repost the link to Angie Harmon’s rack?
swimdad
Darleen, hey cousin.
Pat Boone, I met him in Australia when I was a kid. He was involved with some guys that tossed my dad out a ten story window. Read the book ‘The Crimes Of Patriiots’. Pat Boone is on page 81-82, 83,88.
… or Daniel Boone’s “All you need for happiness is a good gun..” as a tramp stamp.
I liked Pat’s strawberry wine when I was in like the 7th grade… I could get 7th grade girls to drink it.. That was before I discovered vodka in Hawaiian Punch of course..