Fonda: “Little story about Barbara Boxer, if I may. Scene: EXT. Malibu beach house, summer 1987. Barbara and I are relaxing by my pool, making Reagan jokes and sharing a nice Sensi Star spliff and some wine coolers—when all of a sudden off comes the top to her O’Neill two piece, and the next thing I know the broad is fishing around inside my trunks for a handful of Captain Peter.
“Well the thing is, we’re just friends, the two of us —so I try to rebuff her gently with, ‘Hey, let’s not, like, ruin the moment with a lot of physical bullshit, y’know?’—but she right away tenses up and let’s go my joint, and I can literally sense that she’s feeling humiliated. So I try, ‘it’s not you, baby. I think your breasts are sublime. It’s just, well, I’m digging this buzz and these rays…’—but she’s having none of it, pulling on her top and taking the last swig from her cooler, telling me she has a meeting she forgot about and has to go. Then, just before she walks off, she hits me with, ‘Oh, and about those parking tickets? I looked into it and I’m afraid there’s nothing I can do. Sorry. You’re just going to have to pay them, I guess.’
“At which point I’m thinking: bummer. Should have just played with her nipples for a few minutes. Because $800? —that can buy a lot of really good shit, man.”*
Depraved brilliance? Or brilliant depravity. Either way, funny as hell.
It’s always depressing being debriefed by Boxers.
It must be hard for Barbara to sell her things:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&category=29458&item=3952165456&rd=1
Sorry, the link to her “EXCELLENT ANTIQUE FOLK ART LARGE NEGRO WOOD PUPPET” doesn’t appear to work.
I don’t think I’m really adding anything to the discussion here, but this really needs to be said:
Barbara Boxer is a RAVING DOUCHEBAG!
Now back to your regularly scheduled comments…
Sell? I thought she was buying!
So … now we’re back to nipples! ‘bout time!
[keyword “large” OK]
Dude, Condi looks like she’s dropping a right nasty Cleveland Steamer in that photo. Very unbecoming. Might be time for a colon cleansing to soften up that back up eh Mrs. Rice?
Imagine God told you to fuck two congresspersons.
Pelosi, Boxer. Why not?
Tear it up, big boy…
Well, for a bit of a more umm.. classy response to what Rice should have said to Boxer go here.
But Jeff, you’re the only blogger I read that can make me laugh till I cry while at the same time getting me just a bit turned on.
It’s a gift, you know.
What’s say we give Barbara a wedgie!
…. you have to give her credit for trying really, really, really, really hard!
[keyword “love” Stop it Jeff!]
I watched that this morning, and Boxer should be grateful I wasn’t in DC today; I wanted to beat her like fresh caught salmon.
I’ve decided the next time I am in DC, I will freeze a few cans of shaving cream, extract the condensed tubes and sneak them in a mini cooler into Boxer’s office and drop them on the floor behind her desk. A few minutes later POOF, her office is frothing like a thirty year old Maytag.
Jeff – you are not supposed to channel someone’s spirit until after they die. I swear I could hear Peter himself while I read
– Dude thats just wrong….Everyone knows Fonda shagged only biker chicks….
– Oh and this smoke filled cesspool you call the green room where all your following ( both of them ) sit patiently between commercials are still waiting for the “nipple siren” which is fast becomeing just another blogger version of an “urban legend” by now….
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I think its better to buy that craps(shits)rather then sucking nipples like tiny child.
http://www.Johnbeck.tv/john-beck.html
lol man . u r so funny better is u buy some madicine u enjoy very well.
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Best of luck
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