Here are a couple three Tweets of mine you’re free to steal and pass around.
This whole thing’s been a surreal joke anyway. May as well go with the flow, right?
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Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
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Georgetown U’s President and the law faculty just released a statement defending Sarah Fluke from ‘villification.’ Good to know Georgetown U Law supports attempted perjury by its students.
If she wanted to avoid “vilification” she shouldn’t have whored herself out to the Democrats at the expense of the First Amendment and those of us who don’t much want to know about what she does with her lady bits
“Re’ren!”
with an arm swoop and a stomp, from the immortal prose of Gabby Johnson.
Well, Jefferson was fond of authentic frontier gibberish.
Q: How many Sandra Flukes does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Dude, she’s in LAW SCHOOL. YOU do it for her. And use one of those really good bulbs too. Hurry. It’s dark in here. Don’t prevent women from having access to light!
——
Q: Why did Sandra Flukes cross the road?
A: She didn’t. Hello! She’s in LAW SCHOOL. Drop what you’re doing an go pick her up and carry her across the road. And no, she won’t share her venti mocha or scones with you. Hurry up! Do you hate women or something?
—–
Q: What do you get when you cross Sandra Fluke and a violin?
A: A violin that needs you to pay for its exotic and expensive birth control while it goes to LAW SCOOL but for reasons of objectivity and civility is in no way to ever be called slutty or a slut because she is NOTHING like that stupid hick, sports caster, retard breeding, jesus freak, congresswoman hit calling, quitter bitch Palin and her goofy slut daughter. Or Bushitler’s little tequila swilling whores. Whatever. Oh and while we are in there fuck that Breitbart guy too! Shut your effing mouth and be civil nazis for once!
I don’t think I could have fit those answers in 140 character constraint, palaeomerus.
Good answer. Good answer. I like the way you think. I’m gonna be watching you.
truth wept
Q: Why did Sandra Fluke cross the road?
A: Because somebody on the other side of the road wanted to have sex.
Sorry Jeff. I don’t have a smart phone so I don’t really understand Twitter as well as I should. I’m still living in the tail end of the ‘mouse and keyboard at a desk’ era and I think 1998 thoughts more often than I do 2010 thoughts much less 2012 thoughts.
I meant no disrespect.
How many Sarah Flukes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, but she’s going to screw it long and often, and we’ll pay for the screwing.
Q: Why did Sandra Flukes cross the road? A: Republican caused gridlock resulted in a lack of available contraceptives for women.
——
Q: What do you get when you cross Sandra Fluke and a violin? A: Bigger deficits and tax increases.
—–
Q: How many Sandra Flukes does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Obama has already changed the lightbulb to a greener model.
Better?
Don’t be silly, there isn’t enough room to screw in a light bulb!
How many Sarah Flukes does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. “Shut up”, Obama explained.
How many have you got?
Off topic, but I bet this guy is a democrat…
McGehee, nice one.
I have spoken to several of my lady friends about this and they all laughed at Rush’s comment (and many of them are on the left) and all said it is no big deal. They all do not want anyone messing with their birth control, but they all are fine paying for it. And many of them noted they got it for free from Planned Parenthood while in college. So Ms. Fluke should check that out and STFU. She is not that good looking, but I suspect she can troll for free drinks in Georgetown to save some money too.
Limbaugh.
What do you get when you cross Sarah Fluke with a violin?
A slut with a waistline.
bergerbilder and mcgehee, I did a post on it…
Pity
Rubber drive. She wants contraceptives we should give them to her.
In solidarity with Rush Limbaugh
Now that he’s officially apologized, maybe not so much.
OUTLAW!
Sdferr, I wonder if Rush apologized before it was disclosed that she was a professional slut for the Institute for Reproductive Freedom and Free Fucking and Justice for All.
I suspect Ernst (without any evidence at all let me hasten to add) that his brother — among many others he respects — got in his [bad] ear and persuaded him to shift.
R I Red, I don’t know but think the piece just went up this afternoon, so guessing, I’d say not.
Oh, I was just being ironic. No offense taken. Just joshing. As I sometimes used to do.
For over 20 years, I have illustrated the absurd with absurdity, three hours a day, five days a week.
In this instance, I chose the wrong words in my analogy of the situation. I did not mean a personal attack on Ms. Fluke.I think it is absolutely absurd that during these very serious political times, we are discussing personal sexual recreational activities before members of Congress. I personally do not agree that American citizens should pay for these social activities. What happened to personal responsibility and accountability? Where do we draw the line? If this is accepted as the norm, what will follow? Will we be debating if taxpayers should pay for new sneakers for all students that are interested in running to keep fit?In my monologue, I posited that it is not our business whatsoever to know what is going on in anyone’s bedroom nor do I think it is a topic that should reach a Presidential level.
My choice of words was not the best, and in the attempt to be humorous, I created a national stir. I sincerely apologize to Ms. Fluke for the insulting word choices.If Ms. Fluke, who volunteered herself as the public face for everything I have just spoken against, feels she is owed an apology, or if her supporter do
TOO DAMN BAD.
this apology was a fluke no?
I’m afraid that when I hear the word “fluke,” I still think “liver.”
And the sewer monster from The X-Files that Jeff mentioned in another thread.
#narrativeFAIL
sandra the parasite
link
i mean really the proggs found a fluke looking to sponge off of people?
One dropped s and one dropped o, and just like that I blew my shot at auditioning for Rush’s new publicist.
For me it’s…
well sandra certainly is some type of tool
What, geoffb?
Cool hand fluke?
You know, Jesus could have done a better job promoting his message if he’d just stopped provoking the scribes and Pharisees.
I mean, really: healing people on the Sabbath? They couldn’t have waited one more day?
Not to mention hanging out with whores and Roman lackeys, the very scum of society.
Then he up and calls himself the Son of God, which he HAD to know would set them off screaming about blasphemy.
And the worst of all? He actually called them “whited sepulchers.” Right out loud. Right there in public.
AND HE DIDN’T EVEN APOLOGIZE!
Possible band names:
The Liver Flukes
Liver and the Flukes
Geoff: A little NSFW warning would have been nice with that link.
Link in the ellipsis.
Now I’m really confused dicentra.
Jeff continues to bring the funny on twitter:
This made me laugh, so I thought I’d share.
Cranky-d that pun flew right on by me till it came around and whapped me on the back stroke.
I did not know electronic testing tools were erotic.
baracky and the flukes
Your link was to toolsets.
That’s unnecessarily provocative. Why can’t you see that? RAAAAACIST!
If finally recalled what I think of when I see “fluke.” It’s a “Far Side” cartoon depicting a movie about a liver fluke.
A $5k four-channel 200MHz portable color scope? Pure sex, baby!
To which, I’d add: “I want one of those, but I can’t afford it. Perhaps I could get the government to force some Catholics to buy it for me. For the FAIRNESS!! and all.”
legalzoom and Select Comfort/Sleep Number Beds pulled their advertising from Rush.
Andrew Breitbart had more balls than the entire management of these two companies combined.
Expensive electronic test gear is an Important Men’s Health Issue, people! Why would you deny me, merely because of my inability to pay for same?
Haters.
Companies have no spine at all.
They only care about bad publicity, not principles.
Also, Twitter suddenly decided that I don’t follow @proteinwisdom anymore, so I missed that whole delicious maple syrup thread.
I’m with John Bradley, mens tools are a healthcare issue too!
Companies are spinefully responsive to market signals. So let these two be signaled, is the way to go, I think. Individuals making individual purchasing decisions or non-purchasing decisions based on their understanding of the totality of the circumstances.
oh noes a chink in the armor
I’m with John and geoffb on this. If Ms Fluke was only using Snap-On all this could have been avoided.
From what leigh’s suggested, Ms. Fluke just might be quite adept at using Strap-On.
meanwhile in the real world
Youcef Nadarkhani Executed: Christian Pastor Hanged in Iran for Being Christian
Limbaugh “apology”:
Maher refusing to apologize:
Rush should come up with a new flavor of Tea that tastes like an unwarranted apology and has birth control properties. A bottle a day keeps the babies away.
He could charge $1000 for a year’s supply of the stuff. Call it Fluke’s Formula Prophylactic Iced Tea made with REAL SUGAR.
Make it “Real Sapphic Sugar” and I’ll buy a bottle.
JG,
that bit with Karinlee from Canada was museum quality.
All that wallop in 140 characters.
Treviño again, who has been outstanding on this:
Yeah, how about that, Mitt? You lean on Rush to make an apology?
Hmm. Twitter decided I wasn’t following @proteinwisdom anymore too, though I was still getting the autobot posts. Weird.
Thanks. Sadly, though, I don’t imagine she knows she’s been hit.
I wonder if Rush is baiting a trap.
How do you think his apology is going to be received by the left?
here’s some nro flaccid
link
I hope he’s baiting a trap. I thought Rush’s First Rule was “Never Apologize!”.
Naw, this can’t be!
Three Occupy Oakland protesters charged with hate crime
Oh dear are we still laboring under the fantasy of ‘cycle breaking’ and presuming that “they” only hit us when we deserve it? Really? After decades to figure out the rather obvious pattern? NRO is STILL this clueless and spineless and likes to wear a jaunty top hat and tails to the weekly beatings because that’s the classy way to be treated like a dog toy?
@nr
You’re seeing what happens. Because you’re not rewarding “decency”, you’re rewarding indecency in the name of civility.
I intend to coarsen. I want stark contrasts drawn. I want polarization. I want “moderates” to pick a side. I will not quietly accept socialism so as not to upset anyone. I am not tolerant of our impending and increasing slavery.
We’re at a fork in the road. There is no middle path. Time to choose. And there is no time to whine about the people explaining this to you.
Fuck. There is absolutely no reason to ever apologize to the left. Once you give in to progressive, they push even harder.
Perhaps Fluke will sue Limbaugh and Rush will slaughter the slut in court.
“. . . to the left.”
Don’t think that’s how Limbaugh looks at it, or will look at it. He is speaking to one person in particular.
mike farell says that on a peta psa
link
A palette cleanser.
I already miss Breitbart terribly. Shit.
I always thought Rush was off base with calling her “Slut,” since, well we have no proof she’s screwing wantonly.
A better phrase would have been a graphic anatomical reference.
The first rule of warfare is never, ever get too far from defensible ground.
Been away for a while and just read the twitter conversations so what the hell is this about “mansplain”?
dicentra can “chicksplain’ it for you Darleen.
>>>sdferr says March 3, 2012 at 4:47 pm
Companies are spinefully responsive to market signals. So let these two be signaled, is the way to go, I think. Individuals making individual purchasing decisions or non-purchasing decisions based on their understanding of the totality of the circumstances.>>>
I agree with this in principle but I already have a bed and have no current need for any automated printable legal documents. You really can’t boycott what you weren’t going to buy anyway. Or maybe I’m just lazy and unambitious. I also don’t buy people flowers or chocolate covered fruit very often and I don’t need an online backup service. I don’t think I need life lock either. I guess the best I can do is buy a case of tea. I like tea.
On Twitter they say Quicken Loans and GoToMeeting also pulled their ads.
That’s two more services that I don’t use. Teleconferencing and loans are not a big part of my life right now. Geez. I wonder if Rush wants me for a listener. I don’t even think my local garage uses BG lubrication products. I don’t even buy the unofficially marketed stuff. I don’t even have a Mac unless you count my old dual 4G in the closet.
I am apparently a very shitty free-riding listener. Why can’t he sell slim-jims or coffee or raisins or something I like?
So did Carbonite, which continues to sponsor Ed Schultz.
Many of the shows on talk radio would not exist if it weren’t for Rush but I doubt that any of them will drop the sponsors who dropped him. That would be so unpragmatic.
I am not saying Sarah Fluke is easy, but…
What do you get when you cross Sandra Fluke and a violin?
Straddlevarious?
Q: How many former Limbaugh Sponsors does it take to change a light bulb ?
A: I dunno, but in Soviet Union light bulb changes youuuuuuuu!
oh they’re doing the glenn beck thing. as alec baldwin would say: interesting>
since mr. rush has ad spots open time for the “protein wisdom march fundraiser” coast to coast on eib.
The latest roster of sponsors dropping Limbaugh: Quicken Loans, Sleepnumber, Sleeptrain, Citrix, Legalzoom and Carbonite (whose CEO David Friend describes Fluke as “courageous and well intentioned”).
Piss on all of them.
Full disclosure – having used a Citrix product, I had already sworn that I never would patronize Citrix again.
Add GoToMeeting and ProFlowers to the list of collaborationists.
I’d bet Limbaugh will find other advertisers.
What these companies will find is the left wasn’t using their pproducts much before and that won’t change. On the right people will to an extent pull away and find alternatives. Business will go down.
And as for the appeasing the left by giving in…
pw fundraiser idea bumperstickers: “fluke obama”
The only reason I’ve heard of any of those companies, outside Sleepnumber beds, is b/c of Levin and Limbaugh.
Let them bail. They can all fuck off. I don’t subsidize condoms for others, and I sure as hell won’t subsidize cheap grace.
yea reading a script full of bs to pelosi is “courageous and well intentioned”. the soft under belly of corporate america.
sandra fluke the jesse jackson of condoms. we need diversity in the shake down game.
Yup. They are looking for their chance to sink Limbaugh, but he’ll come out the other side with new sponsors.
They didn’t want him to apologize. They want him silenced. Finished. Shunned.
It’s what they do. It’s who they are. And helping them in their argument is a sucker’s game. Hell, Weiner got caught with his dick out and STILL Dems were defending him.
Whereas “our” side looks for ways to appear “sane” and “sensible” — so utterly and totally controlled are they by the Left, and so totally and utterly do they want to be accepted by it as one of the “good ones”.
And they don’t even know it.
this is so sad. allan help us.
link
or mitten’s propaganda finding a useful outlet
I wonder if Neil Boortz will take a stand or if he will play pure business and keep his mouth zipped.
He’s often very iconoclastic and “untamed” until it starts to cost him money or stations. Then he metamorphoses into a reasonable conventional person who has no axe to grind.
I remember that he was all for the republican wipe out in 2006 and was singing it along until 2008 when he saw what he had been cheering for and how hard it would be to stop and reverse. He was also pro Obama in the Demo primary until he saw that Obama was not really a safe centrist reprieve from a Hillary term. He seems to be a bit of a epimethean thinker who learns by being spectacularly wrong about huge issues. He clumsily learns about the various properties of beer steins by dropping them onto concrete. They don’t float in the air when you let go of them, they seem quite brittle, they don’t really stick to your hand, they don’t punch holes in the floor, they always go down and never up or sideways, etc .
He’s currently part of the “temporarily voluntarily really dumb about Santorum” crowd where you intentionally destroy your faculty for reason to make hating Santorum easier than it should be, usually revolving around a frantic and morbid fear that he will be a hyper theocrat/american taliban who will outlaw rubbers if elected and arrange marriages from the White house. Oddly Neil hates on Santorum for Newt’s sake instead of Romney’s but he still thinks that backward j-freak so-cons lost 2006 and 2008 and that magical reformed libertarians* won 2010. No doubt gaining a few independents is far preferable to losing a crap load of so-cons. It’s a big tent unless you are a so-con, then not so much.
* (The tea party is a bit like the lonely salt-monster from Star Trek in that every one who looks at it sees something different except for the left who wants to kill it with a phaser before it eats all the red shirts.)
Personally I’ve never seen a real Fis-con in the candidate or elected politicians of either party. No, not even Ron Paul. What has he ever cut or even almost cut ? He’s talker.
I’ve seen loads of people who call themselves fis-cons that but they are just moderates which are timid-path democrats who want the same thing as mainstream democrats only they want to ease into it over 15 years in case the theories are (surprise!) dangerously wrong. Actual supporters of government cuts (as opposed to mere cuts in planned baseline rises )seem to only exist in the punditry and bloggers and the voting base. I don’t see any real political reality to that particular branch of the big tent tribe(s). It’s like a unicorn. Lots of them on tapestries but none in the livestock pens.
At this point, I suspect that ‘government cutting’ may be more of a dumb voter mating call than a real studied and followed position. It’s a potent myth that inspires the gullible to come and line up for yet more growth. When it comes time to do it, cutting the government is always portrayed as utterly unthinkable and dangerously radical even after a period of massive public sector growth on borrowing during an economic crash. As an activity it seems way over the collective GOP nut budget. Why there might be riots!
mitten’s lost to the not romney tonite
Romney36.0%15,709
Paul
25.0%
10,919
Santorum
24.6%
10,730
Gingrich
10.9%
4,738
64% vote against you>victory
I actually tried a sleep number bed once at Highland mall back when people still went to malls and it was still open and full of shoppers and store. Now it’s owned by a community college and I think have only the central part is open. + It was like laying on a soft muffled air hockey table with a sheet over it. I can’t say that moved me to buy one. My sleep number is probably an imaginary expression. Maybe they aren’t all like that but I’d have to be in a lot of pain to buy one and endure it. It was easily as annoying as having a CPAP machine strapped to my face.
It was easily as annoying as having a CPAP machine strapped to my face.
That is the WORST thing in the world, she said from experience. If the Sleep Number bed is anything like the same, include me out.
Also Daniel Knauf, creator of Carnivàle, is declaring that #IAmAndrewBreitbart.
On FIE-ah.
Follow him!
I would not be surprised if I have sleep apnea, but there is no way I would get that breathing thingy. I would tear it off in my sleep.
Just looked at his twitter feed, di. Awesome.
I would tear it off in my sleep.
That’s where the Ambien and Lunesta and other sleeping pills come in. I was rotating among three types to keep from getting used to any of them.
If you have apnea, you wake up feeling as if you hadn’t slept at all, and any bed-partner reports that you stop breathing for a bit, then snork loudly before resuming. Your short-term memory and concentration are shot every single day, regardless of the stimulants you take.
No rest for the weary, that’s what apnea’s like.
The best part about sponsors dropping Limbaugh is that we don’t have to listen to the same stupid ads over and over.
WIN-WIN!
Looks like all the emails are favorable:
…everything sounds like welcome home, come home…
I think Rush may be feeling the weight of responsibility for the people who work for him. Lord knows he doesn’t need the largess of his show’s sponsors. However, a general in battle cannot not be moved by the dire straits of a few of his soldiers lest he lose the entire campaign. I can only hope that this is a feint within a feint in order to eventually gain the higher ground.
It is time to fight back…
No way I’d miss Rush tomorrow. I expect he’ll say that “slut” was undeserved, then launch into “professional political operative” who still wants the gov to order others to pay for her consequence-free sex. I hope.
And now, tonight’s musical guest performs their Ode To Sandy Fluke.
I have a Sleep Number bed. Had it for years. I’d kill for a real mattress.
Sit & Sleep has the most annoying commercials, and we spent an arm & a leg but after having it for a couple of years, I’d buy another “Sleep to Live” mattress in a heartbeat.
Pathetic. And after the case of the vapors over this at Ace of Spades, that edgy, tough blog, Mr. Spades says “Rush mans up and apologizes.” Balls surrendered on a silver salver. No wonder Mr. Spades is a lawyer IRL.
That’s all they were asking, Mr Orwell. That Rush just do the right thing and apologize to the woman whoring herself out to the progressives so that they can perhaps win a PR battle on the defeat of the First Amemdment and, ultimately, of the individual liberty it was drafted to protect.
And really, is that too much to ask?
I’d kill for a real mattress.
That Sandra Fluke sounds pneumatic, McGehee.
I’m a memory foam guy. Wouldn’t own anything else.
“…That Rush just do the right thing and apologize to the woman whoring herself out to the progressives so that they can perhaps win a PR battle on the defeat of the First Amemdment”
This is also the opening battle to defend Obamneycare and socialized medicine in general.
What if someone said Fluke were a slut metaphorically? Would our allies (sic) on the right have supported someone saying “Fluke is a slut for whoring herself out to Democrat interestIndy delivering propaganda in Congress?” Because that is the truth.
Okay, stop laughing.
Oops
“Democrat interestIndy delivering propaganda in Congress”
–>Democrat interests by delivering propaganda in Congress
I guess I should not post with giant fingers on a tiny mobile
I see this as a chipping away at our* natural distain for having our First Amendment rights throttled. Not Rush’s apology, per se, but at our willingness to think that it’s just not nice to pick on the little law student and, besides, everyone but icky Christianists, especially of the Catholic stripe, are down with contraception and abortion.
I’m waiting for some hapless dupe to be handed a script by Pelosi and Company wherein she spends an hour or so whinging about how her insurance company won’t pay for endless expensive IVF treatments because she waited until her eggs expired and now wants us to pay for her babymaking expenses. For the fairness.
*Not us here, but “us” in the aggregate.
Freedom all too often in our day has come to mean “as in free beer.” Or reservoir tipped Trojans, according to your tastes.
Ann Althouse has decided that the Church is a bigoty bunch of bigots.
Ron Paul, on CBS this morning, on Limbaugh.
How positively, pragmaticly, progressively, Libertarian of him.
He really does want to control what words mean, but that is not how language works. And he wants to control language while simultaneously expressing fear that other people will control language.
That’s pretty damn funny, leigh.
I thought you would all enjoy a bit of Theatre of the Absurd on a Sunday, SilverWhistle.
leigh, that link of your is separate post worthy.
What the hell is it about lawyers anyway?
A cheeseburger really is a vegetable! Because I say so!
Althouse quotes Cardinal O’Brien thusly
before she quips, “[p]ut that in the annals of bad analogies!”
Seems to me it’s only a bad analogy if you don’t understand it.
I love this comment fromTim
If you think that’s what Orwell was teaching, you didn’t understand the lesson.
Tim also thinks that Animal Farm was about talking pigs, I’m guessing.
The “cheeseburger is a vegetable” thing became less funny to me when I read the news of the first man giving birth.
Well, this ought to make you laugh, bh. I gave a little titter.
Went looking for a headline that didn’t put quotes around “pregnant man” but now I’m going to link this because the picture doesn’t even look that weird. It looks like a dude with a serious beer gut.
Now, let us ask Ms. Althouse, did the meaning of man or pregnancy change as is only natural or is this simply a woman taking testosterone and then getting pregnant?
How if it’s “cheeseburger are a vegetables”?
Heh, SW.
The comments are nearly as absurd as her analysis.
Of course the inevitable comparison of being a homo is equated to being black is trotted out. Because they are exactly the same! You h8rs!
Hey, that’s not language, that’s just playing around with the meaning of words, bh.
Marriage is elopement is cohabitation is shacking up is bestiality.
When I was a kid, and I found myself flying down a slippery slope, I’d let out an exuberant “Whee!”
Not so much anymore.
Breaking news. Jesus was a hermaphrodite.
It is not possible to assert with any degree of certainty that Jesus was male as we now define maleness.
Dr Cornwall has a mind like a steel trap.
wake me up when they claim mohammed was a hermaphrodite
It’s only the start of the second week of Lent. Doesn’t that idiot Cornwall realize you’re supposed to save stories like that for the week of Easter?
A rare accurate use of the metaphor, the more you use a steel trap the rustier it gets….
[…] in the first place. As for “rewarding decency for a change, and see(ing) what happens”, one of Jeff’s commenters says it for me: You’re seeing what happens. Because you’re not rewarding “decency”, you’re rewarding […]
I don’t know, newrouter, they may be on to something. Last time I saw a guy freak out and trash a booth at the church carnival it was because they wouldn’t let him return a scarf he got concealer on.
This is a joke right?
If I say no will I have to provide you access to a fainting couch?
http://dailycaller.com/2012/03/06/investors-flee-carbonite-after-limbaugh-announcement/
Real life feels good.
So Jesus wasn’t real if he was he was just a crazy Jew who pissed off the romans and he might have had a mixed set of parts? And this theory comes from literature that we were told is fake?
SCIENCE mother$#@$er! DO YOU SPEAK IT!?
businesstroll needs to come back under a new name and tell us how smart businesses are when they make decisions like the one Carbonite made.
So I can mock him then ban him again.
Well, let us see:
I guess that’s a big fat no.
And anyways, science is so patriarchal and heteronormative. Really, it’s a form of intellectual discrimination against other ways of knowing.
Dare to disagree with me, PIG!