Deadbeat neighbor: “Dude, what’s up with your nipples.”
Me: “Pretty fearsome looking, eh?”
Deadbeat neighbor: “Yeah. Angry, even.”
Me: “I know. Listen, listen…. You hear that…?
Deadbeat neighbor: “What –?”
Me: “– My nipples just called you a bitch. How cool is that?”
Seriously, Jeff – everytime you talk about your nipples getting hard, I’ve gotta tell you, I get a little turned on.
Jeff, have pity on poor Superman and give him back his nipples.
He can’t fight crime with your squishy nipples, now can he?
Have you decided how to best exploit your talking nipples? If you just could teach the “perky twins” to guess ages and/or weight you’d make a killing on the county fair circuit.
Just a thought…
Aren’t you a little worried about breast engorgement? That’s painful.
Nicole, why do you think he mentions them?
Don’t give him what he wants.
MCGeHee, and you know about his squishy nipples….how?
… or maybe a “Patty Duke” inspired sitcom? You know, one nipple likes classical music and is very cultured and the other is some kind of hip-hop gangsta mogul. Call it “Tit for Tat” or something…
There’s some serious cash to be made if you can just keep ‘em talking.
I’m really happy for you and your “new and improved” talking glass-cutter nipples, Jeff, but how do I get these scratches off the inside of my screen ?
Inquiring minds want to know – do the areas around your nipples have hair on them? If so, is the hair also erect? Does it do ecthings as well?
Joe, you get those tattoos to talking and you and Jeff would have quite a road show.
Jeff, you are so weird.
Let me try that again.
Jeff, you are so weird.
Yes. But I’m weird in a sexy, “fiercely independent nipple pair” kind of way.
Sparkle, there was this robbery, see, and the guy emptied his gun at Superman, and one of the bullets hit one of Jeff’s nipples, and it spoke French.
Squishy.
I really really am disturbed by the visuals I get here….but in a wierd sexy disturbed way.
I’m more concerned with the turn your relationship with your neighbor is taking… you’re just messing with him, right? wait. that’s not what I meant. crap.
Rightwingsparkle – just admit it – you’re a little turned on too.
I suppose a visual aid is out of the question.
Whoa! Girls! Lets calm down.
Nicole, I’m taking the 5th.
Attila, please, go right ahead.