Completely hungover and miserable.
Here→
Michael Moore—circus-freak huge and probably hungry. John Kerry—starched, wealthy, and consistently annoying. John Edwards—thumbing through Jane magazine in the waiting area of an upscale salon even as we speak, thinking, Jeez, I sure do love bunnies.
Now go. Enjoy your pancakes.
update: That’s right. Who’s your daddy now, bitch…?
Jeff, Ok, I have the perfect remedy for a hangover. You will never have one again….listening? ok, here goes..DON’T DRINK SO DAMN MUCH!!!!
Kathleen’s advice, while powerful and probably right has the unfortunate disadvantage of sucking.
Or something like that.
Ready for another shot yet?
First you’re afraid you’re gonna die, then afraid you won’t… Lo siento, amigo.
(I’m typing very quietly)
For prevention of a hangover:
Consume 2 multivitamins before drinking commences (I use GNC’s MegaMan). Optional: Add a half-dosage of over-the-counter pain reliever (NOT a whole dosage).
Your equilibrium will still be shot to shit the next morning, but you won’t have even a hint of a headache.
And that’s a Good Thing.
Zombyboy, now come on. 2 glasses of a fine merlot and I’m as fun as you can get.
MegaMan huh? Theres a pill for everything now.
And I’ll bet for Mark V. they even work.
It takes a few more before JeffG is as fun as he can get–trust me, I know. And it is worth buying the shots to get him to that point, I can tell you.
(The smilies are just so cool that I had to have one for myself.)
I just love talking about Jeff when hes not here.
JeffG drunk is something that I am sure is a unique experience all in itself and one that I would pay to behold.
So, let’s all do it again next weekend. Woo woo!
Jeff you’ll enjoy reading the professional faux RNC blogging competition.
http://www.comedycentral.com/tv_shows/indecision2004/rep/diary.jhtml
Jeff, did you get Barry Manillow’s autograph?
I’m thinking Comedy Central needs to hire Jeff to do the satire blogs. That was not even remotely funny.
Joshua —
Thanks for the link. Coincidentally, I know Helms from the late 80s (he and his brother Dignan used to clean my pool), and I ran into him outside of MSG on Sunday night. He offered to “tickle me in the good spots” if I gave him some of my material. I said no thanks, of course. Reading his posts, though, it looks like he took some of it anyway.
Which, I must say, really pisses me off—especially after the jerkoff asked to borrow $10 for a sandwich and cab fare, and like an idiot I gave it to him.
****
Rusty—he signed one of my breasts.
Kathleen—You flatter me.
Kathleen, agreed.
p.s. I’ve heard Vegemite is good for a hangover. Russell Crowe likes it. Get’s you back to flinging plates and biting ears in no time.
You’re just lucky that cop had a sense of humor.
“We started a story whose end must now wait…”
Joshua, we were kinda on a roll with the smileys.. and you just…broke the rhythm.
Jeff, you have umm..breasts? well, no wonder you drink.
Men have breasts. They just aren’t round (except for Micheal Moore’s). And it’s difficult to get milk out of them, no matter how much you pump.
(When you buy chicken breasts at the market, are you picturing large, pendulous mammary glands? ‘Cause that’s not right.)
My hangover prevention: drinking lots of water right before i go to bed. of course, i never get so drunk that i can’t get up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night, so i suppose this advice can be used only by some.
my second preventive technique is to eat when i drink. it makes one fat, but it does slow the alcohol.
1) jeff – +1 on the bottle rocket ref.
2) attila girl – you can milk anything with nipples. even cats.
But when you milk cats you usually get blood—your own.
<pause to select a smiley>
Cat milking? and there’s no
::spong::
smiley.
Kathline, sorry.
Sarah, I just saved that image and it’s going to be added to my smiley collection. Jeff can do the same if he cares enough.
Your wish is my command. :spongg:
I really hate emoticons. <sigh>
You know mentioning breasts usually takes a convo in an entirely different direction. This is so refreshing!
Altho cat milking is disturbing.
Joshua, you would be easily forgiven if you had spelled my name right!!
(not really, just wanted to use that smiley!)
speaking of which, what is cool cheese?
-> coolcheese:
ok, cool cheese smiley didn’t work.
Did I say “impossible”? No. I said “difficult.”
Recently I had a three-day family weekend, the only way to get through it being the continuous consumption of various forms of alcohol. My father had recently been signing the praises of a magic hangover pill, so I prepared by buying a couple of packets. The brand name in England is “RU-21” (I have no idea if it is supposed to be a pun on the drinking age in some US states). Allegedly it is based on research done by the KGB to find a pill that prevented its agents from getting too pissed. That failed, but they did discover a combination that seemed to ward off hangovers. The instructions recommend one pill with each drink taken (which if you are counting probably helps moderation!). I probably took 2 for every 3 on average and they certainly seemed to help. The morning after the first night before I managed to jog 9 miles (am in training for a half-marathon), which was knackering but no worse than normal. I did need to remember to drink water before going to bed, but I did not get any hangovers. However, the Tuesday after the Bank Holiday Monday, I was absolutely useless at work, feeling very tired and unable to concentrate or apply any intellectual effort to anything, so it all partially caught up in the end. Still, in conclusion, they worked!
<sigh> no one got my cat milking reference <insert emoticon here>.
cat milking
The best way to avoid a hangover … 2 (or 3) tylenol followed by two huge glasses of water as you go to bed. If you still get a hangover in the morning … you *really* drank way too much. Of course, if you stick to the expensive stuff, and avoid sugar mixers … you’ll be better off in the morning as well. That’s my advice, as a former bartender.