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Getting ready to leave for New York

…which is plotting to protest my arrival by readying a week’s worth of rain, if an app on my iPhone can be believed.

If anyone will be in the city and would care to meet up, shoot me an email today.

Before I leave, I did want to direct your attention to what is, in many ways, a very instructive glimpse into the minds of self-appointed, self-deluded, would-be liberal elites, whose supposed intellectualism, it is often found upon even cursory probing, is but a carefully crafted veneer, made up of ready-made signs, referents, markers, and other bits of iconography that they hope will point to a possession of knowledge, to suggest it, without their ever having to do the hard work of actually collecting it.

Nowhere is this more clear than when Deepak Chopra, a singular icon in the Age of Oprah, launches an attack on Sarah Palin that is positively riddled with caricatures, liberal buzzwords, and contempt for doltish, pig-ignorant flyover country rubes — a cliche-ridden verbal broadside smothered in curious arrogance that exhibits virtually no real knowledge of history, its subject, or of the American people as a whole.

It is a piece written by and for the same person, with Chopra appealing to those who, like him, must watch with an infant’s helplessness as their glorious, soaring intellectualism fails spectacularly, with devastating consequences, on a national and international stage — stung by the increasing certitude that, having been unmasked and laid bare as poseurs and false prophets, they will be rebuked by the very rubes they presume it their right to rule over, and the country perhaps even saved by someone who actually believes unironically (!) in America’s quaint mythologies about itself.

But what most strikes me is the neediness of the piece — Chopra’s strained insistence in laying out the markers so readily identified by those he’s hoping to please. It’s almost as if Chopra himself knows that, but for his eagerness to display such markers — indeed, to wear them as a badge and champion them in (mundane and predictable) attacks against such creatures as Sarah Palin and those who see in her any worth — those of his set would easily dismiss him and in no time replace him with another pet wog who can speak authoritatively on the Portuguese origins of Vindaloo, or perhaps with something even more exotic this time, like, say, a single mother from Cameroon who, though she’s hunted gazelle and made rugs from zebra hide (and so her authenticity can’t be questioned), is still willing to sneer at Sarah Palin’s bourgeois twang and unseemly optimism.

So Chopra knows he must dance. And one imagines that this piece is just the latest jig in a life filled with pitiful Bojangles moments.

But hey — whatever gives you inner peace and cleanses your spirit, right, Deepak? Ooooooooooooohmmmmmmmm.

****
update: More here.

192 Replies to “Getting ready to leave for New York”

  1. Abe Froman says:

    Chopra is the Richard Simmons of flapdoodle.

  2. dicentra says:

    against such creatures as Sarah Palin

    Did you hear how Dana Milbank out and out called Glenn Beck a “creature”?

    Mask slipped, Dana.

  3. geoffb says:

    He has done it before.

  4. sdferr says:

    dicentra, I linked in JHo’s last thread Barry Rubin putting paid to Milbank. Rubin doesn’t mince.

  5. The Monster says:

    He further predicted that, at his rally in Jerusalem, “the very gates of Hell are going to open up against us.” Later, he said that Israel may be destroyed “by Labor Day weekend” and that his gathering “may be the last time you get to see the holy sights.”

    Well, Milbank, you seem to be proving his first point by attacking his rally with your smears about him supporting anti-Semites. You get that stuff from Chuck Johnson?

    And I believe he was talking about holy sites. By quoting him with a misspelling, you subconsciously make him look stupid. Unless you just can’t spell your damn self.

  6. dicentra says:

    which is plotting to protest my arrival by readying a week’s worth of rain

    Having been in the World’s Largest Outdoor Urinal™ in both the rain and the heat, I can testify that the rain is far better for one’s sense of smell and hygiene.

  7. bh says:

    Great post.

    Enjoy New York, Jeff.

  8. Squid says:

    It’s good that he goes by “Deepak” so that people are regularly reminded of how Deep he is supposed to be. I’m convinced it’s the primary reason why his masters keep him around.

  9. pdbuttons says:

    i thought deepak chopra was the name for a flotation device

  10. dicentra says:

    dicentra, I linked in JHo’s last thread Barry Rubin putting paid to Milbank.

    Dude, the gfx of the knife doesn’t help me AT ALL.

    On the other hand, Rubin’s observation that

    the real antisemites are whitewashed, while those fighting antisemitism are called antisemites. The supporters of Israel are called enemies of Israel by those who themselves are generally enemies of Israel

    is chilling. These people are now willing to baldly assert the exact opposite of the truth instead of merely undermining it at the edges or distorting it with clever sophistry.

    Glenn is right: the mask is being removed and the gloves are coming off. Their true natures are being revealed and it is frightening indeed to see it from fellow Americans instead of distant Nazis or Arabs.

  11. Abe Froman says:

    Having been in the World’s Largest Outdoor Urinal™ in both the rain and the heat, I can testify that the rain is far better for one’s sense of smell and hygiene.

    It ain’t deadly until August. Now it’s just mildly gross.

  12. How can a guy who’s deepest thought is “cardboard no; fiber, yes” make fun of anybody?

  13. Pablo says:

    Outstanding stuff, Jeff. Nailed it. Also stapled, folded and mutilated it. Thank you.

    Mask slipped, Dana.

    Did you catch Beck’s second hour? Milbamk was left looking kinda like this.

  14. Wm T Sherman says:

    Deepak Chopra suffers comprehensive pwnage in a few seconds:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qySx8tSs8BQ

  15. newrouter says:

    i see you a deepak chopra and raise you a cenk uygur and throw in a fareed zakaria

  16. Slartibartfast says:

    It’s not the leaving for New York that’s tough; it’s the escaping from New York.

    Pack a nail-studded bat, just in case.

  17. happyfeet says:

    Mr. Chopra’s criticism of Palin is sorta all over the map but it’s rooted in the idea that she’d make a crap president. I doubt she’d be as much of a lightning rod for Chopra’s sort of rant if she were to work harder on creating an identity for herself separate from a presumed and hypothetical presidential ambition.

    It’s worth a shot.

  18. Jim in KC says:

    Damn. What an asshole.

  19. newrouter says:

    leave the bed bugs behind.

  20. Abe Froman says:

    I have an idea for a movie: People say “Sarah Palin” three times and a pikachu arrives. Sort of like BeetleJuice, only with red velvet cupcakes and dancing hoochies.

  21. happyfeet says:

    I’d go see it!

  22. Jim in KC says:

    I mean, WTF? The guy sells hogwash for a living. He preys on the weak-minded, for crying out loud.

  23. bh says:

    Burton and half those actors are currently booked with… Frankenweenie.

    Honestly, I think they might be better served with your intriguing Beetle Juice reboot.

  24. Jim in KC says:

    Oh, and New York: The USS Intrepid is really cool if you have time to visit it, Jeff.

  25. The guy sells hogwash for a living

    Honey nut clusters are haraam? What am I to do? My peristalsis is peristalling!

  26. Jeff G. says:

    Other “lightning rods” just asking for trouble: woman who wear make-up or skirts; children who help pedophiles look for imaginary lost puppies; bond holders for Chrysler c. 2009.

  27. Abe Froman says:

    Frankenweenie? Good Lord. At least Whit Stillman (finally) has a new movie coming out, so there’s that to look forward to.

  28. guinsPen says:

    Now comes Deepfoot Chopra and the Bull Shit Party.

  29. happyfeet says:

    except for none of those lightning rods have designs on the presidency Mr. Jeff

    it’s a key distinction, and one I’m sympathetic to I think

  30. Jeff G. says:

    other “lighting rods” with “designs on the presidency” just asking for trouble: Michele Bachmann; Herman Cain; Rick Santorum; Newt Gingrich; maybe Tim Pawlenty; ultimately Mitt Romney or John Huntsman.

  31. Bob Reed says:

    Enjoy NY JeffG. I’d set up a elbow bending session but we’re leaving for a parental unit visit in Ocean City Maryland tomorrow.

  32. Ernst Schreiber says:

    What the hell are you worried about, hf? She’s unelectable. All the best people say so.

  33. Bob Reed says:

    Herman Cain is especially looking for trouble, inauthenticy and all that…

    Oh, and by the way, you used the word “jig” in a post about a transnational man of color. We all know what that “code” means.

    And since JD’s not here right now, I’ll render an assist: DENOUNCED! and CONDEMNED!

  34. happyfeet says:

    unelectable doesn’t mean she can’t still contribute Mr. Ernst

  35. serr8d says:

    Hi, ‘feets!

    Did you ever stay awake at night, look through the alchemy of the LA night sky at the stars and wonder as to the true meaning of marriage? Here you go.

    Put that in your turtle shell and smoke it.

  36. happyfeet says:

    there aren’t any stars in the LA sky hardly

  37. pdbuttons says:

    loneliness-is a crowded room
    full of open hearts that turn to stone
    all together all alone

  38. dicentra says:

    It ain’t deadly until August. Now it’s just mildly gross.

    I spent all of August 1996 in NYC in a studio apt with no A/C and with barely enough money for subway fare.

    Even the vultures were grossed out.

  39. dicentra says:

    Did you catch Beck’s second hour? Milbank was left looking kinda like this.

    Not in Milbank’s eyes. He knows he’s lying about Glenn and doesn’t give a rip what evidence anyone may muster on Glenn’s behalf.

    He also does it at Soros’s behest, gladly, for free, because he’s just that kinda guy.

  40. pdbuttons says:

    if u can wear a red leather tuxedo
    ur a better man than me gunga din

  41. ccoffer says:

    Before this, Beebop Chupcabra was a real hero of mine. Now here I sit all disillusioned and stuff.

  42. pdbuttons says:

    late that night
    i parked my car
    something something-to the singles bar
    face to face
    toe to toe
    something something dim the lights
    u can guess the rest

  43. cranky-d says:

    Chopra is a moonbat who preys on the easily lead and/or easily duped. He has made millions off of new-age crap.

  44. pdbuttons says:

    should/ as a predator/ think of the other
    as a conquest?
    or l;et her white skinny ass
    bend over and pet my pug?

  45. pdbuttons says:

    one day harry pottere will hafta bend over and
    our long national nightmare will be over
    weiner

  46. newrouter says:

    to finish deepak chopra you add lime and ginger in the last 10 min. of baking.

  47. Bob Reed says:

    One other thing to watch out for in NYC JeffG. It’s a good thing you’re on vacation and not working. ‘Cuz, see, there’s this ordinance; they only allow 5 wingnuts in the city at any one time. And, like, a “wingnut” is pretty much defined as anyone who doesn’t hold similar views to, say, Howard Dean. And considering Abe lives there, and I and my apostate Democrat wife count against that total, even though we live adjacent to the city on nearby Long Island, well, that’s dangerously close to the limit.

    And forget about disagreeing with Obama. On anything. You might as well just cut two eyeholes in a sheet and put it over your head; because you’re clearly a racist, I mean, fuhgeddabowditt.

  48. zino3 says:

    Jeff .

    Ah..forget it. bring my e-mail. I konw much, and would be honored to meet you.

    Despite my posts.

  49. bh says:

    Whit Stillman has a new movie in the works? Awesome.

    Wait, no Chris Eigeman?

    Booo! Booo!

    Booo!

    You’ve changed Whit, you’ve changed.

    (Somewhat on topic, Deeprak Chopra is more closely related to a palm-reading bunco operator than anything else. I’m not going to say he’s Roma but I wouldn’t correct someone else if they did so within my hearing.)

  50. happyfeet says:

    I adore Whit Stillman movies

  51. happyfeet says:

    he should make one wif vampires though or spaceships maybe

  52. bh says:

    He thinks it’s unlucky to make a million or more on the opening weekend though.

    It’s part of his process. That and casting Chris Eigeman. Who might well become homeless now without this gig.

    This is worrisome.

  53. bh says:

    We might want to consider making sure someone runs over to his place with a casserole or some lasagna every couple days or so.

  54. happyfeet says:

    On his hesitance to screen Sevigny in Kids, Stillman ‘fessed: “I really like watching [Production] Code movies… I’m Mr. Breen’s biggest fan.” This love of “Hollywood’s Censor” may imply a certain conservatism, but the articulacy, remorseless humor, class awareness, and Episcopalian conscience of Stillman’s works convey a refined iconoclasm.*

  55. pdbuttons says:

    what ‘saur name? dinosaUr? VIRGINIA PLAIN

  56. pdbuttons says:

    A STINKY ROSE sorry – smells so fine in
    other peoop-poopoo i said poo
    poo
    in other peoples misery?

  57. bh says:

    Heh, what a silly thought from the VV, ‘feets.

  58. bh says:

    That really is a great find though.

    The old Hollywood code is conservative. While articulacy stands on the other side. Along with humor, class awareness (empathy, really), and conscience.

    That dude is well and truly cocooned with closure of the epistemic sort.

    I wonder what he makes of Ellis. I’m sure it’s equally as deep.

  59. bh says:

    Oh, I forget that we don’t all hang around, drink and shoot the shit about this stuff.

    I mention Ellis because I’ve described Whitman as laying the groundwork for pieces like American Psycho before.

    Imagine Metropolitan after the Horatio Algiers phase. Imagine a bit of numbing, a bit of disillusionment.

    He’s basically filming the prequels to American Psycho and Glamorama.

    See, that’s the sorta wild shit you should be saying if someone actually pays you write about this shit for the VV.

  60. newrouter says:

    “Whit Stillman”

    another nyc certified pop culture loser. palin,palin,palin

  61. happyfeet says:

    I like Ellis too but I never read The Informers and I had it for years before I finally tossed it in the move

    hey this is anguishing for to see it will make you cry or you’re an inhuman bastard

    here is a related article

    “Shaming which causes an employer to fire someone for the reputation of their business is OK,” Captain Vancouver wrote on his blog.

    okey dokey

  62. pdbuttons says:

    idian fart joke number one
    pfffffft

  63. pdbuttons says:

    cyrus fart vabne poo

  64. bh says:

    I shall not watch a link that might make me cry. I’m like that.

    Read The Informers. Seriously. He dissolves a good bit of the actual tension with the ending. But, again, not like a normal novel structure. This is not an exit. Or, in that instance, yo, there is some vampire shit going on. Not like your earlier joke. Like he made the joke long before that shiny vampire nonsense and our ironic reaction to it.

    He’s sorta doing the same thing there, going performative and making of point of it with an anti-climax and an anti-denouement. Jeff has thoughts on this.

    The most important thing is that all of us read it so that we can then feed me, bh, important hints and tips about various aspects of Glamorama.

    And how it might relate to early Stillman films. In case I pick up that coveted VV gig.

  65. Abe Froman says:

    That makes a lot of sense, bh, even if I have neither the brains or inclination to expound on it. The existential angst of WASPs as they grapple with a changing world.

  66. Abe Froman says:

    Oh, I meant that for your comments preceding 64.

  67. pdbuttons says:

    virus man bear pig julia child

  68. bh says:

    64 was really my bestest comment though.

    We should all think about it for a moment and then pray that no one we care about ever has to write for the VV, whether it is tritely, simplistically or just predictably.

    Amen.

  69. bh says:

    “Whit Stillman”

    another nyc certified pop culture loser. palin,palin,palin

    This is another instance where you should more closely differentiate your friends from your foes.

    If Whitman has made your list, your list needs revising.

    Likewise, if your store don’t have Mojo Nixon, then your store could use some fixin’.

  70. Abe Froman says:

    Shame on you, newrouter.

  71. Bob Reed says:

    happyfeet, that is a moving video, to be sure; but here’s why I personally have little sympathy for the misguided youth.

    When I was in highschool in the 70s, everyone, and I mean everyone, was occasionally blowing a “j”. Think of it as “mob mentality”, if you will. Anyway, about 2 months before graduation, I was part of a crew that was busted in a park for doing the same. Unfortunately for us, one of the fellows had a large amount of stash on him. Mellows were definitely harshed that night so long ago.

    But you see, it doesn’t end there. Through hard work in school and many endorsements, I had wrangled an appointment to the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, and was set to go there in late july of 1977 for orientation. However, approximately 6 weeks later I recieved a letter in the mail, which said that they had been informed by the National Capitol Park Police that I was arrested for being in violation of the controlled dangerous substance act of 1970, and therefore had recinded my appointment. Needless to say, I nor my folks were very happy…

    Now, fortunately for me, the Navy was not as discriminating when I graduated from the college ROTC program a few years later, and ultimately it never mattered vis-a-vis security clearances, assignments, etc; as long as I openly admitted it.

    So, I know the kid wants to play junior water polo and all, and is sorry, but so was I. And I’m thinking that blowing an appointment to the Air Force Academy is worse than the Junior water polo team. And anyway, he’ll probably get his slot back anyway.

    But, you know, learning at an early age that actions have consequences has a tendencey to sharpen one’s focus.

  72. happyfeet says:

    I might could see The Informers movie.

    Mr. Bob that sucks really hard, even worse than the water polo thing. I have a coffee cup from the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs. I remember they had this crazy huge church organ and some way cool architecture with lots of dramatic stairs hither and yither. And coffee cups what you could buy.

    But still I wish the best for this kid. Sometimes police cars just want exploding, you know?

  73. happyfeet says:

    honestly Mr. bh it’s mostly that I’m afraid that reading Mr. Ellis while actually living in LA might be harmful and confuzzling

  74. Abe Froman says:

    Wow. That’s brutal, Bob. I don’t have a whole lot of sympathy for the Canucklehead, but you done got royally screwed.

  75. happyfeet says:

    especially canadian police cars

  76. Bob Reed says:

    Thanks for the good thought fellows. As I said, everything ultimately worked out OK, despite all of the angst of that time.

  77. Abe Froman says:

    I wonder if Jeff is still around. I totally spaced on offering up NYC suggestions/recommendations/help.

  78. Bob Reed says:

    You can probably contact him via e-mail Abe.

  79. bh says:

    I have thoughts that way myself but Jeff’s a traveled fellow.

    Shit, he’ll tell you where to hang out in different parts of Italy, New York, Maryland, and the high ass places I’ll call Den Ver.

    Not sure that he knows Denmark or Serbia though. We should maybe lure him there and then make fun of his inability to find a major roadway after being blindfolded in the woods.

  80. Abe Froman says:

    Yeah, I kind of assumed Jeff was familiar with New York. But if someone hasn’t been here somewhat recently, the cost of things can be shocking. I still weep inside every time I pay ten bucks or more for a beer.

  81. Bob Reed says:

    I know. I remember when a 100 dollar bar tab represented some serious drinking. But now, it’s just a few rounds for a couple of buds out bending an elbow.

    Criminal I’m tellin’ you.

  82. bh says:

    You guys should really consider putting all that on your account.

  83. Abe Froman says:

    Expense accounts are for people in suits. I’m just lucky that I come from dive bar and pool table stock, so I do penance for the obscenity that is la vida trendoid by also knowing all the still relatively cheap bars and restaurants in town.

  84. bh says:

    Expense account?

    Nah. I meant face stabbing in a darkened alley account.

    These two things are often confused. No biggie.

  85. Sarah Rolph says:

    My suggestion for NYC is the Circle Line boat tour. Goes, as the name implies, all around Manhattan.

    Another cool thing to see is the Cloisters, way up on the northern tip of the island. You can take a bus there. And of course, if you go on the Circle Line, you see the Cloisters from the water.

    I suppose it is telling that my favorite parts of the city feature getting the hell out of the city.

  86. Slartibartfast says:

    Mr. Chopra’s criticism of Palin is sorta all over the map but it’s rooted in the idea that she’d make a crap president.

    As opposed to all of the sterling presidents we currently possess?

    >unelectable

    >

    A self-crippling concern. If unelectable is accurate, then you have nothing to worry about. If not, you have nothing to worry about. So: why worry?

    ultimately it never mattered vis-a-vis security clearances, assignments, etc; as long as I openly admitted it

    I have a very good friend (who is technically in my professional chain of command right now; upchain) who has a possession arrest on his record. He also possesses a TS clearance. You’re correct: as long as you own up to it, and it’s sufficiently obviously due to youthful stupidity, it’s a temporary setback.

  87. Slartibartfast says:

    Oh. Please disregard the HTML-fu.

  88. happyfeet says:

    no as opposed to ranting about Sarah Palin outside of the very particular context of her presumed presidential ambitions and the bus tour antics that he presumes are part and parcel of said ambitions

  89. Slartibartfast says:

    presumed presidential ambitions

    Note the first word. It’s very important, that first word; you’re resting a whole lot of blather on it.

  90. happyfeet says:

    it’ll be a credit to her should she choose not to run, and I’m definitely leaning towards thinking she’s not running if only cause of the side of the bread what has the butter is a decided known known to our Sarah

    but also she has a history of daffy and erratic decision-making

  91. pdbuttons says:

    who’s this sarah chick and does she
    have a website or 800 # because i’d buy a “tea”-ha ha shirt from her even if it was marlon brando white
    i have a indelible marker so i can
    write some crazy-ass shit on it

  92. pdbuttons says:

    if she ran i would
    rent a corky- retarded kid and plop plop plop him
    in a ‘lil’ stroller and start a run run rudolph sarah
    save the christmas and i know that
    the only reason i did-put effort innit was cuz
    i am a cad and i like female butts in
    spandex and this is a cry for help pat benatar

  93. happyfeet says:

    run run rudolph sarah save the christmas is I think a pitch-perfect encapsulation of the je ne sais quoi what a Palin candidacy promises

  94. pdbuttons says:

    don’t be a grinch

  95. happyfeet says:

    sarah palin sheryl crow sugar cookies huffy bikes butterscotch new ponies peace be with you and also with you

  96. pdbuttons says:

    fat white guys with silver beards
    bore me
    unless they got gifts

  97. pdbuttons says:

    a pd hf throwdown!
    i’m in!

  98. pdbuttons says:

    u start
    asshole face

  99. pdbuttons says:

    bobby orr!

  100. happyfeet says:

    I will start on a positive note by listing my favorite things about Sarah Palin what I like most or are kinda interesting

    1. endless merchandising possibilities

    2. she’s very pretty. She could be on tv she’s so pretty.

    3. she’s a hard worker she probably already has her garden put in and she might even get two tomato crops this year

    4. she likes to drill baby drill

  101. cranky-d says:

    Put a sock in it, hf.

  102. happyfeet says:

    run run rudolph sarah save the christmas Mr. cranky

  103. pdbuttons says:

    the reason- if i hafta have onethat i’m gonna vote for snowbilly hoochie
    was because she was a lil old mayor and she got elected
    and white guys tried to shuffle her off to buffalo
    and she said “bullshit on that”

  104. happyfeet says:

    that is a perfectly nice reason I think

  105. pdbuttons says:

    she has the “fuck you” power
    i like

  106. happyfeet says:

    fuck you powers grow ever more puissant the more you don’t use them I think and they can atrophy with overuse unless maybe you’re samuel jackson then nevermind

  107. pdbuttons says:

    as the curtain shuts
    and u gaze down at ur ruby slippers
    a choice/ not a echo

  108. pdbuttons says:

    would i like every potential lil baby to be born
    with a dr pepper in theer clutches?
    no- i would like happyclam to join me on the sarah sarah sirhan sirhan don’t call me shirley
    boo hiss on any m otherfuckers whop
    whatever
    lockl and load

  109. happyfeet says:

    10 2 and 4 baby wants some more

    as for sarah palin she is still on her post-gubernatorial quest to find herself I think and I’m rooting for her

  110. pdbuttons says:

    iam having a change operation from..
    a/ to b
    just cuz happyfeet is..
    u know
    and to see him/it/her bust it for sarah reality-town
    vote from ur heart ha ha ha

  111. Abe Froman says:

    I feel like I’m eavesdropping on two preschool children at a playground.

  112. pdbuttons says:

    coke or pepsi?
    snow hoochie helicopter shoo9ter got hot? teeny daughter who is- obviously tried-wink
    or that arrogant asshole
    pick ur lemon
    lemon picker

  113. pdbuttons says:

    hi abe- jump in

  114. happyfeet says:

    do you for reals think she’s running though?

    I think it’s a really remote possibility. Romney Pawlenty and Huntsman. Those are the choices so far.

    It’s very bleak.

    Perry could grab the nomination I guess. But I’m not sure what any of this is gonna accomplish.

    Team R has desperately failed to craft for itself a mantle of leadership.

    They spended all weekend golfing and bickering about abortion pledges.

  115. pdbuttons says:

    i am worried about global stuff ans my sweat glands and abe
    cuz momma said every hot dog with a crown
    shouldn’t be trusted

  116. pdbuttons says:

    even the president
    of the united states
    has to stand naked
    mmm/ reminds my of/ keith richards is gonna sing a song
    i gotta pee

  117. pdbuttons says:

    helen keller felt stairs
    and landed on her fore-head

  118. pdbuttons says:

    helen keller felt stairs
    and landed on her fore-headhot

  119. pdbuttons says:

    ice cream truck bjork
    calms city hills

  120. happyfeet says:

    global stuff and sweat glands always get me

    down

  121. pdbuttons says:

    i wanted to play
    with donny mac
    and he was an idiot
    so i threw the ball
    into the middle of the street-he got killed
    and he got run over
    mangled up
    guilty as charged

  122. pdbuttons says:

    crosby dirt sperm and fingernails are having a charity aid sing thing sonny bono ex-wife will ski into ur heart and steal ur heart did i say heart?
    heart

  123. pdbuttons says:

    lonliness
    is a crowded room
    full of open hearts
    that turn to stone
    all together/ all alone

  124. pdbuttons says:

    how many straws/ does a man hafta suck
    to right ur ship?
    this is a story of the hurricane
    he got blameeeeeeesd 4 something he never done.but
    one time he coulda beeeeeeen the champion of south park
    i love south park
    yer mom

  125. Slartibartfast says:

    Another thread turned to crap by happyftpdbuttons.

  126. happyfeet says:

    that is an uncharitable view

  127. happyfeet says:

    run run rudolph sarah save the christmas Mr. Slarticus!

    I love that.

  128. Squid says:

    that is an uncharitable view

    So is “Obama is ruining the country,” but sometimes there’s no charitable way to state the obvious.

  129. happyfeet says:

    Obama is ruining the country but it beats a sharp stick in the eye.

  130. newrouter says:

    by allan i hope this is the kiss of death

    Even though he won’t be able to cast a vote, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.) picked his favorite Mormon candidate in the GOP presidential field on Tuesday: Jon Huntsman.

    link

  131. Mike LaRoche says:

    sarah’s going to run
    and sarah’s going to win, the
    pikachu’s last sigh

  132. pdbuttons says:

    if a baby races elected pezdentsi’d bet on bachmann

  133. pdbuttons says:

    ha! who ruined the thread?
    spit in the mirror and rub it/come clean

  134. happyfeet says:

    this is one of the better threads I think

    it is a thread of quality and distinction

  135. happyfeet says:

    here is the story of Mr. Ebert’s naughty naughty tweet and the aftermath and how can we shame him to where he will stop the naughty tweetings?

    Alexandra Petri, self-appointed tweet police hoochie.

  136. guinsPen says:

    If you haven’t got a penny,
    A hap’peedee will do.
    If you haven’t got a hap’peedee,
    God’s blessed you.

  137. Bob Reed says:

    Well Mr. Buttons, is this thread headed to 1000 also? I’m always impressed by how, er, healthy your avatar looks.

  138. Bob Reed says:

    I was never a fan of MTV’s “Jackass” series, thinking that, much like “Jersey Shore”, it contributed to the decline of the collective American I.Q.

    That said, I saw something in “The Daily Mail UK”, about Ebert’s obnoxious assertion in the wake of that fellows demise, and thought that it was classless at the very least.

  139. newrouter says:

    “it is a thread of quality and distinction”

    swiss cake rolls that’s distinction says the hoochie little debbie

  140. happyfeet says:

    I never saw Jackass I was busy back then – wasn’t that also around when they did those bosnia serbia wars or whatever?

  141. Abe Froman says:

    I made a Darwin Awards crack on a NY hipster music blog yesterday, but I’m not Roger Ebert, so I can be all crass and insensitive about dead idiots. I only saw a few segments of jackass ever, but that was more than enough. Kind of like Johnny Knoxville as an actor though.

  142. JD says:

    Jackass is/was one of my all-time favorites.

  143. Abe Froman says:

    I can picture you having been partly crazy when younger, JD.

  144. JD says:

    I was all crazy, Abe. I still am, if you ask Better Half.

  145. pdbuttons says:

    aww- u like me! admit it!
    so- im a plasterer and a general contractor
    got a contract for
    pet smart inc and i gotta go tomorrow and do my stuff and it’s the second one i gotta do
    and it;s like the wal-mart of pets they got grooming
    so i’m [at the first one]
    doiong my stuff
    and this woman comes over and starts to gab/ about pets- and i tell her that i had a blue cat andthe conversation ended

    et smart

  146. happyfeet says:

    you have to be careful when you drink and drive your porsche is my understanding cause of they’re quick like a bunny

  147. happyfeet says:

    everyone likes Mr. buttons cause of buttons is a value-added proposition

  148. guinsPen says:

    The horse of a different end that you’ve heard tell about.

  149. pdbuttons says:

    so she comes overchecking me out
    im working but the smell of female stops my trowel/ and i give her a gaze
    hi- hi
    she got calf high leather boots and im thinking
    blow job blowjob blowjob

    and she tells me/ she saves feral cats or something
    uhh- i gotta get back to work

  150. newrouter says:

    so a jackass takes a high performance economy on a drunken test drive and kills himself. is this relevant?

  151. happyfeet says:

    you can’t legislate a positive attitude it has to come from inside

  152. pdbuttons says:

    may i ask newsrouter a question
    of course i can and if i keep talking to myself i might talk my way
    into a mental house
    theres a fine line yadda yadda genius
    so’ if u r kind of nuff
    what is the best grateful dead song cuz i kinda hate em
    and i went to college and washed dishes and took shit
    4 500 clams
    and this dead-head’s uncle had a boat and he went out in feburary 4 two weekks and made 2 thousannd diggy dollars and i think i learned about envy that weekend

  153. pdbuttons says:

    what did one dead-head say to the other
    dead head when they ran out of drugs?
    this music sucks that’s all i got

  154. pdbuttons says:

    i am thinking about adoptin a ca t only from one of them gals supermodels from that video
    addicted to love with bobby palmer
    and i wouldmuggy for camera with kitty cat
    and get my teeth cleaneeed and smile 4 the camera buyt
    sad to say
    when the lights dim and make up off,,,

  155. guinsPen says:

    Sixty-three words into comment number hondo fifty-three is another thing what comes from there.

  156. Bob Reed says:

    So the Dalai Lama walks into a Pizza parlour, and the counter guy, Vinny, says, “what kind of pizza d’you want, bub?”

    And the Dalai Lama replies, “Can you make me one with everything?”

    Without missing a beat, Vinny says back to him, “Madon! I thought that was your gig; Fuhgeddabowditt…”

  157. happyfeet says:

    Mr. Lama reminds me of my grandma. Just very polite and sweet-natured.

  158. happyfeet says:

    except for grandma being dead and all

  159. Bob Reed says:

    He seems like an alright fellow happyfeet. In #157 I was trying to recount a play on words involving Buddhist theology that I heard within the last few days. Since this thread is about NY I Brooklyn-ized it.

  160. newrouter says:

    “except for grandma being dead and all”

    so is karl rove marx. mr. lama is a leftoid “creature”.
    mr. lama is a non threatening communist.

  161. pdbuttons says:

    wot is the sound off one hand clapping./
    lassie/cripp;ed wet lassie

  162. happyfeet says:

    Marco fails to mention that his pansy-assed state is shivery quivery scared scared scared of drill bits

  163. pdbuttons says:

    how many motherfucking wet lassies does it motherfucking take to change a motherfucing light bulb?
    roddy mcdowal

  164. geoffb says:

    Fits here.

  165. pdbuttons says:

    why did liz taylor cross the street?

  166. happyfeet says:

    just when you least expect it bam there’s a penguin!

    What a wonderful wonderful world.

  167. sdferr says:

    We have an opportunity to rid ourselves of Bill Nelson in 2012, and though I don’t know who’ll end up running against him I still think we’ll get it done. After that we may see the Fl senators singing another tune about the gulf.

  168. happyfeet says:

    I’m not blaming anybody I just thought it might have warranted a wistful mention… but yeah Nelson is not good for America

  169. guinsPen says:

    We sent Junior on a moonbat hunt.

  170. Pablo says:

    what is the best grateful dead song cuz i kinda hate em

    That depends on what you’re doing. If you’re looking for love, go with Sugar Magnolia.

    In other news, it seems that Nutroots Nation is coming to my doorstep. Heh.

    That headline is pretty clunky, ain’t it? I was thinking I oughta go downtown, buy some drinks and commend some barkeeps for a minute there.

  171. guinsPen says:

    Little prick never texts.

  172. pdbuttons says:

    as wet lassie/ down/ i can really tell she’s a beat,,

    comes dragging her bareely beating heart
    across the river and
    with her mournful eyes she looks up at me
    her saviour!
    do i say- u wanna go out?
    uuuu-wanna,,,go out?

  173. happyfeet says:

    National Soros Radio’s Frank James drops down hard to his knees and enthusiastically slobs our butch militaristic president’s bellicose knob

    On the eve of his Wednesday evening speech to the nation in which he will announce how he plans to reduce troop levels in Afghanistan, it’s Obama who finds himself fending off calls for a rapid drawdown of U.S. forces there.

    And it’s Obama White House aides who have defended, against Republicans and Democrats alike, his power as commander-in-chief to order the U.S. military to play an extended role in the NATO effort to bring down Libya’s Moammar Gadhafi without formal congressional approval.

    Not so long ago, national security was the Republicans’ strong suit. Try as they might to gain traction on such issues, Democrats found themselves unable to break through.

    But times have changed; Republicans have lost the advantage.

    Frank deserves a raise.

  174. pdbuttons says:

    not sorry/ when i see venus i think of dylan
    botticellies niece etc
    i mean/ give me a good dead song
    or ha ha
    are there any?

  175. pdbuttons says:

    if u got 2 drummers u should have riddim

  176. Pablo says:

    Frank deserves a raise.

    You could probably buy Frank with a pudding cup.

  177. pdbuttons says:

    castanets are underrated
    so said the joan
    said to the chatchi

  178. guinsPen says:

    Come quick, Eunice !

    Junior’s struck the mother lode !!

  179. guinsPen says:

    Finally, a postcard.

  180. pdbuttons says:

    one
    just one goof feaf ull dink song
    just one
    if u name a greatful dead song that is half ass good/
    i will 9 who am i?}\
    stones/ jumpin jack
    beatles- from me 2 u
    abba-waterloo
    bee gees-
    ha or not ha the grateful dead suck!

  181. Bob Reed says:

    Well, it may seem hack-tastic to suggest this, but

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pafY6sZt0FE

    Busted, down on Bourbon street…

  182. happyfeet says:

    this is interesting and little-noted I think

    Whitman doubts she will ever again run for elected office, and for many months she said little about the campaign. But she has started popping up recently on radio and TV. For a beaten candidate who wishes to remain relevant in politics – Whitman is advising Republican front-runner Mitt Romney in his presidential campaign, and she plans to involve herself in California ballot initiatives – it helps to stay in view.

    maybe she’ll advise him not to piss away a fortune on a vanity campaign of little substance

  183. Bob Reed says:

    Whitman backing Romney; who wouldn’t have guessed that…

  184. happyfeet says:

    it’s a read the whole thing though cause she sorta maunders on about how she thought everyone really liked her it’s just blah blah blah

    it’s pretty pitiful

  185. pdbuttons says:

    i wrote a book its called leaves
    of grass and its about blowjobs and wet dogs and roddy
    mayor cheese and wet dogs / mmm/ iggy pop ans furniture and maybe roxy music but i got editoor

  186. pdbuttons says:

    so the door bell rings
    and no ones there/ but then i hear a voice/ low but getting louder
    waly whitman walt whitmam matt damon walt whitman
    and i think- “fuck- mm- shit- oh fuck me!
    zo i pull the power to shut off the lights and stuff
    but im not all there cuzzy wuz its dawn breaking
    over matt damons head and i am freaking out and ive drawn the shzdes
    sooooo- i yam mnickey rourke despareteh
    help

  187. Mike LaRoche says:

    eric roberts to the rescue!

  188. Spiny Norman says:

    Maunders? I think you mean “meanders”, ‘feets.

    Just trying to help.

    I liked “butch militaristic president’s bellicose knob”, though.

    ;^)

  189. happyfeet says:

    this maunder! “To talk incoherently or aimlessly.”

    but meander works too

    but bless her heart she really must be mortified

  190. guinsPen says:

    Thus spake Mr. Maunder.

  191. pdbuttons says:

    what kinda person that saw a moth fluttering outside its window attracted to light open up the window
    to let it in and then the moth fluttered about and- ha!- bugged the shit outta u and u think “oh shit!, i’m an idiot!” but then i got a drivers liscene so it all equals out

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