BAGHDAD, July 1 (Xinhuanet) — “A defiant Saddam Hussein rejected charges against him in his first appearance before an Iraqi judge on Thursday, saying ‘this is a theater, the real criminal is Bush’…”
Reached for comment, former Vice President Al Gore concurred, then finished his strawberry-banana smoothie.
Testifying for the defense, a large whale like mammal who reeked of cheese whiz and mutton stated that before George Bush illegally invaded the defendants country, everyone in Iraq was doing fine and didn’t need any help pushing their fellow countrymen through industrial grade shredders. Also, the large bloated bovine stated that those beheadings we are witnessing now in Iraq were analogous to the revolutionary militiamen from America.
He then proceeded to eat the Jury, the judge and most of Saddams defense team.
The judge replied (sketchy translation here):
“Look, we’re hanging you ass off a streetlight in the middle of the-formerly-known-as Motherfucker Square and letting birds pluck out you eyeballs. You want a lawyer watching or not?”
I believe his first punishment should be a session with Queer Eye for the Straight guy. Then a little cameo with Extreme Makeover for a nip and tuck on those bags under his eyes. Only then should be buried in the sand.
In other news Affan warns Sudan to stop with in 48 hours.
I think after that he’ll strenuously object to Sudan’s behavior.
After that I think he’ll get the UN human rights council to formulate a harshly worded letter where the Sudan rep who sits on said counsil will threaten himself.
The Americans have been defeated. Saddam’s army has roasted their bellies. Is this thing on? Bush is criminal.
You know that Joe Isuzu guy had a great career until Baghdad Bob here ruined it.