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February fundraiser [sticky; newer posts will appear below – TUESDAY UPDATE]

Rise up! Take to the streets! For freedom!

(I’ll worry about the end game once I’m flush with cash. Hope that’s okay…?)

****
update: about 2/3 there. Thanks to all who have contributed. I promise to buy nothing but the finest cold and flu relief medication.

79 Replies to “February fundraiser [sticky; newer posts will appear below – TUESDAY UPDATE]”

  1. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, JD!

  2. cranky-d says:

    Second, but of course using my real name rather than my fakey internet name.

  3. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, cranky-d!

  4. DarthLevin says:

    Sent. Spend it on a bottle of whatever makes the best Molotov cocktails.

    When we take to the streets, if we’re wearing woad are we racist against Smurfs? ‘Coz if there’s no racisms what’s the fun in rioting?

  5. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, bh!

  6. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, geoffB!

  7. mojo says:

    Steady on there, Braveheart.

  8. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, John B!

  9. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Take to the streets?

    Meh. There’s a bunch’a snow, it’s cold, I don’t have to work today & there’s booze in the house. Plus, it’s Friday.

    Can I stay in, watch The First 48 marathon & just tag the donation “Freedom”?

    I swear I’ll mean it (I am William Wallace, etc). But no way am I going out today.

    Hell, I may even let the dog shit indoors.

  10. Jeff G. says:

    You don’t already let your dog shit in doors?

    Hm. Am I doing something wrong?

  11. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks Chris M!

  12. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Well… I don’t “let” him do it.

    He occasionally plants a stealth bomb if I have a “The Judge can’t see you ’til Monday” type’a deal.

    But always nicely coiled on the tile. Never on the carpet.

    Beagles are very considerate.

  13. Jeff G. says:

    I once saw an installation art exhibit that is eerily close to what you’ve described.

    In fact, come to think on it, where do you live, exactly…?

  14. Jeff G. says:

    (Oh. And thanks, by the way!)

  15. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    I’m now a full-on Texas ex-pat Shanghaied in Arkansas.

  16. LBascom says:

    Hey Jeff, I’ll try and catch you next month. I haven’t worked since the middle of November, but I just know that sweet, sweet stimulus money is going to hit all those “shovel ready jobs” soon!

    Til then, my quick wit and sage wisdom in the comments will have to do.

    Kinda like LYBD’s dog crapping on the tile, and you being happy it’s not on the carpet.

    You’re welcome.

  17. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, BJTex!

  18. Jeff G. says:

    Sorry to hear that, Lee. But no worries: I hear the unemployment rate dropped, and we’re to thank Barack. Also, look at the market. It’s up! So all is well!

  19. LBascom says:

    Don’t I know it, baby! My pension plan is right back where it was two short years ago! Another year like this, and it might be back where it was three years ago! Woo-Hoo!

    I heard about the 9% unemployment rate. If we add another couple of hundred thousand jobs, we outta be back around 5-6%!

    Good times they are, good times.

  20. dicentra says:

    Jonah, apparently drunk-Tweeting from Dulles:

    Hundreds of people ahead of me on line at Dulles. #joy

    Awesome, TSA unionizing. that will make everyone more efficient, charming and considerate. http://bit.ly/hoLFF9 via @keder

    daveweigel Oh god RT @marcambinder: Actual press release: “Obama Administration Celebrates Black History by Winning the Future”

    No one seems excited to get on my plane. What do they know I don’t?

    Since I will be flying 7 time zones ahead, I will have huge advantage in future-winning race.

    Thank goodness I speak jive in case anything goes wrong. shhhheeeeeeeeeeeeet #golly

    You know what would take the edge off? Some airport hare krishnas to beat up. #goodolddays

    jpodhoretz @JonahNRO “I had an uncle in America. He was one of the lucky ones. He escaped in a balloon during the Carter administration.”

    I find drinking a case of Pabst and eating several bean burritos before any transatlantic flight is ideal.

    When I get to the future I’m going to rig it so only I win. #kobiashimaru #allyourhighspeedrailbelongtome

    Now the airline guy says I can’t board with a beer-drinking helmet and a four pound block of cheese. #thanksalotbinladen

    @Noahkgreen Dr. Falken was an idiot. No high speed rail for him when I run the future.

    I would just like to win next Tuesday and then build from that. #startsmall

    If I had a hammer I’d hammer out love between my brothers and my sisters, until the TSA took it away and put me in airport jail.

    What do you mean I have to take off my spaghetti strainer codpiece to board the plane? #thanksalotbinladen

    Everyone forgives crying babies on planes. But if I ceaselessly weep and wail everyone judges. #doublestandard #thanksalotbinladen

    Tell the country “we must win the future” during SOTU everyone applauds. Tell ticket agent same thing get sent to airport jail. #bullshit

    Soylent Green: the official cracker of future winners.

    Boarding now. Heading to future. Sucks for you past-dwellers. High speed rail and rationally classified salmon here I come!

    I put an orange service vest on my boa constrictor, but no ones buying it. #sickofm-fingsnakesonthisplane

    “But stewardess I’m from Ork, this is the way we sit.” #nanunanu

    Good Lord, people are tweeting me as if my baby crying tweet was serious. And you people think ** I’m ** drunk!

    @cathymv You mean they won’t know what soylent green is … Until it’s too late!

    Can’t tell whether the followers annoyed by these tweets outnumber those amused by them.

    Apparently once the cabin doors close you can’t shave a ferret. Something about not removing its service vest #outdatedFAAregs

    I guess I’m just giddy about being named CPAC’s journalist of the year.

    Bummed I’m missing Special Report right now.

    @IMAO_ apparently the confusion is I was making electric buzzer sounds.

    See ya everyone plane go up in air!

  21. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Christ. I think Jonah brought “The Couch” on the plane.

    “The Couch” in the Holy Land…this should be good.

  22. John Bradley says:

    I don’t speak “Twit”, can someone translate for me?

    I assume the “@blah” construct is a response directed at Twitter user ‘blah’, but what does the “#foo” business mean?

  23. Sears Poncho says:

    A few sawbucks to the man with the blog. I have been remiss with the other fund raisers.

  24. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Sears!

  25. BJTex says:

    Strangely enough I’m having the best two months ever in the steel pipe business, all the while starting a 5 day/month chemo system for 6 months.

    Business, blogging and chemistry: It’s what’s for dinner!

  26. guinsPen says:

    The check’s in the mail!

    Pro-rated, of course, for the differently dayed month.

  27. Pablo says:

    I may have a nice wad of stimulus cash headed my way. It would only be proper that I redistribute the wealth.

  28. Pablo says:

    I heard about the 9% unemployment rate. If we add another couple of hundred thousand jobs, we outta be back around 5-6%!

    A couple of thousand jobs a month. For 5 years. If everything else goes right. Then maybe.

    Meet the new normal. Bullets and beans, bitches. And meat, ‘cuz meat is tasty. You’ll want to keep a generator handy for the freezer.

  29. SDN says:

    Jeff, I’m sending you a little something from the snows of Plano…

  30. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks Don, MC, and Steve N!

  31. Pablo says:

    A couple of thousand jobs a month.

    Whoops! That should be a couple of hundred thousand jobs. Still, bullets and beans. You can’t go wrong that way.

  32. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Patrick!

  33. LBascom says:

    Pablo, I was being sarcastic. The 9% was down from 9.7 on the strength of 36,000 jobs. That’s what they were saying on FOX this morning anyway. I don’t know, I don’t keep close watch on the numbers, but I know what horse shit smells like.

  34. dicentra says:

    I assume the “@blah” construct is a response directed at Twitter user ‘blah’, but what does the “#foo” business mean?

    The @blah is where Jonah is responding to someone, unless the letters RT precede the @blah, in which case he’s retweeting something someone else tweeted. So

    The #foo bidness is a hashtag. Ostensibly, you can click on a hashtag and see all of the other tweets that have the same hashtag. For example, the #hhrs is used by listeners to Hewitt’s radio show, so you can join the “thread,” as it were. Hashtags are also used in wit aggregation: right this minute, everyone is joining in on the #statefarmwasnthere “topic.” If you click that link within the next few hours, you’ll see everyone and their dog attempting to crack wise and in some cases succeeding.

    In what I posted, Jonah is using the hashtags sarcastically, which is a common use, too.

  35. Pablo says:

    Pablo, I was being sarcastic.

    Me too, Lee. :)

  36. Mrs Cookies just put the minivan in a ditch. I’m guessing heat stroke, maybe she was distracted by a heat mirage, I don’t know. Anyway, she and the boys are OK, so we won’t be stealing any health cares from the poor today, but the Kia’s a mess. I just put $55 worth of gas in it too. I’ll pony up, but may be late.

  37. John Bradley says:

    Thanks Di, now I feel ‘l33t’ or ‘rad’ or whatever. Possibly even ‘amped’; there’s no telling!

  38. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, John S!

  39. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks Charles W and di!

  40. lilida says:

    Jeff: did my Paypal transaction go through? It hasn’t cleared my bank yet, which is unusual for this length of time, but Paypal confirms.

  41. Jeff G. says:

    Yes. Thanks, Lilida!

  42. Mueller says:

    This is getting to be a habbit. Like almost every month or something.

  43. John Bradley says:

    The post is roughly half the height of a normal post, with curly hair on its feets?

  44. Stephanie says:

    Just sent my cart fees to you today since Mother Earth ain’t cooperating. It’s cold!

  45. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Stephanie!

  46. Mueller says:

    #45
    wise ass

  47. Mueller says:

    habit

    happy now?

  48. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Mueller!

  49. Mueller says:

    Waddaya thanking me for? I haven’t done nuthin. this time I’m gonna have to sell a kidney.

    Not one of mine, of course.

  50. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Terry!

  51. JD says:

    Anderson Spider silva is a fucking monster.

  52. Rupert says:

    Jeff – You can have what’s left in my paypal account plus any money from a Steeler win over 14 points. It’s all I have to go on. Until my Big Ten picks succeed I’m left with little to offer.
    Once again thank you for teaching me basic writing. They say Hemingway wrote the best in paragraph form and Joyce had the best sentence structure. I don’t know. You have some of the best sentences of all time.
    Sunday – I hate the Packers (as a Bear fan), but love their quarterback, and their city and stadium; however, Pittsburgh has always been my playoff team during those rare years the Bears didn’t make it. Good Luck to all.

  53. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Evan!

  54. serr8d says:

    I’m a known and provable jinx to whatever team I pick.

    GO STEELERS~!

  55. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, serr8d!

  56. Darleen says:

    Hi boss, my payday is Wed, so a few bucks your way then.

    Hopefully I can hang on to my job … there is a huge fight brewing between the state and counties since Brown’s idea of saving the state money is dumping programs on the counties. The question being whether or not the counties can just cut those programs.

    Certainly the Feds are dumping stuff on the state but telling same states they cannot cut anything.

    Isn’t Winning.The.Future fun?

  57. Jeff G. says:

    If Obama gets a second term, he can thank his 3000 press secretaries. Whom I believe should be tarred, feathered, and run out into the wilderness on a [high speed?] rail.

  58. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Whom I believe should be tarred, feathered, and run out into the wilderness on a [high speed?] rail.

    And then hunted by Rutger Hauer, like in that movie Surviving the Game.

    I always liked Ice-T for some reason.

    The actor/rapper what dates the white chick with the huge ass and moose knuckle, not the refreshing drink.

    Anyway, I’m glad he survived the game.

    He seems like good people.

  59. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Jim!

  60. Spiny Norman says:

    You’re welcome! ;^)

  61. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Heh. You spilled the beans Spiny. From here on out you’re getting the, “I’m a doctor Jim, not a….”

    And I’m calling you “Bones”.

  62. Jeff G. says:

    I have a SuperBowl party I have to drive an hour+ to get to — in the snow.

    So naturally, I’ve already started drinking. I figure I should be asleep about 10 minutes before I get to the party. Good thing I have programmable GPS on my iPhone.

    That thing drives the car for you, right?

  63. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    OnStar Jeff. That’s where the real money (ambulance) is at.

  64. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, LMC!

  65. geoffb says:

    And then hunted by

    … William Holden in “Open Season“.

  66. TRHein says:

    Your PayPal still doesn’t like my card.

  67. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, John H!

  68. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Roger!

  69. JD says:

    As an aside, usually these threads are troll magnets. Registration seems to be working.

  70. cranky-d says:

    Our last troll found it to be too much work to keep registering new names, I guess.

  71. Rupert says:

    Jeff – Sorry to report that I have had no luck. My comments lack any substance and are very badly written. Still, I have hope. Maybe with a lot of work (and luck) I’ll have something to add to your site. Good Luck and God Bless. ——-

  72. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Weslee!

  73. John Bradley says:

    You know what you never see on these threads? Screaming yellow electric hamsters.

    Which seems like quite the statistical anomoly, given the sheer density of hamster-posts on every other thread.

    Just sayin’.

  74. happyfeet says:

    zoinks!

  75. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, William!

  76. Bill M says:

    I’ve paid my indulgence. Absolution, pretty please.

  77. Jeff G. says:

    Thanks, Thomas!

Comments are closed.