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I am so / into me / I can’t think of nothing else

…And when hermaphrodites fall in love, they just kinda chill and enjoy a tasty beverage. Because what else are they going to do?

****
h/t BH

9 Replies to “I am so / into me / I can’t think of nothing else”

  1. Joe Geoghegan says:

    They’re hermaphrodites, Jeff, not androgynes.  They can do the ol’ rack-and-pinion.  You know, like those Technics(R) legos? 

    See?

  2. Joe Geoghegan says:

    Let’s try that again.  You know the cable jack, and it has that thing, but at the same time, the other part also has a whatzit, and so it’s not clear who’s doing what to whom?

    What?  No, that’s just a sunburn.  Shut up.

  3. Jeff G says:

    Hermaphrodites can enjoy tasty beverages too, Joe. 

    Can’t they?  Sunburn?  What now?

  4. Joe Geoghegan says:

    Yeah, but you also said, “what else are they going to do?” Which said to me that you were picturing a couple of Ken dolls without their Speedos on.  I mean, without the pubis-to-hip incisions.

    And it’s just not so!  They can give each other the ol’ reversi-deucey.

  5. Jeff G says:

    Ah.  Oh.  Oh. Ugh.

  6. Joe Geoghegan says:

    Ball and socket!

  7. Bob Gnarley says:

    I heard from a board certified doctor that hermaphrodites don’t have periods but they do get some cramping.

    *Badumm-PISCH!*

  8. I read somewhere (actually, I think it was Scientific American) that there’s actually a small handful of genders because there are variations in hermaphroditus? err, hermaphrodisia? uhhh, hermaphroditicality? hermaphroditicness? crap, I give up.  Anyway, if I remember correctly it was something like HERM (balanced hermaphrodite), FERM (more female), MERM (more male) and some other equally “interesting” variations.

    While we’re plumbing these depths I might as well throw out the question of whether it would be legal for hermaphrodites to marry each other?  Does that count as mostly gay, mostly heterosexual, or “other”?

  9. Joe Geoghegan says:

    Okay, when my son was born, we registered his birth with the state and reported his sex.  I have heard that doctors will choose the likeliest sex of a hermaphrodite for purposes of recording the birth, acquiring a social security number, etc.  I’d have to assume that if two hermaphrodites wanted to get hitched, they’d have to be lucky enough to have been recorded as “M” and “F”.

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