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The Oprah-fication of Canada

“EDMONTON — Corrections Canada won’t let guards at maximum security prisons wear stab-proof vests because it sends a confrontational ‘signal’ to prisoners.

“If you have that kind of presence symbolized by (a stab-proof vest), you’re sending a signal to the prisoner that you consider him to be a dangerous person,” said Tim Krause.

“It interferes with what we call ‘dynamic security.’ We want staff to talk to prisoners, to see how they’re doing.”

Yes, and I want to eat nothing but hot dogs and cotton candy and stay thin enough to front a sexy Styx tribute band (I do a mean “Blue Collar Man”) but that ain’t gonna happen, either.

Krause, as luck would have it, does not actually patrol a maximum security prison. Instead, he patrols a private wood-paneled office, where his underlings say he maintains a “wonderful rapport” with both his stapler and his ink jet printer — neither of which, they insist, has ever threatened him with a sharpened toothbrush or tried to bend him over a washroom sink and remove his pants.

Last month, Sun Media reported a guard at the Edmonton Institution was threatened with disciplinary action several times by prison brass for wearing a self-purchased stab-proof vest on the job.

The guard, who asked not to be named, said he intends to keep wearing the Kevlar vest.

“Yes, I’m violating the rules. But management is stepping on my right to defend myself,” he said.

Kevin Grabowsky, of the Union of Canadian Correctional Officers, said the notion that inmates might be “offended” is a “complete crock.”

Careful there, Kevin. “Crock,” from what I understand, borders on “hate speech” in your country.

Evidently, nobody in Canada took my salami suggestion.

[via Reason]

10 Replies to “The Oprah-fication of Canada”

  1. rick says:

    Hey, look. I’ve been in prison, man. And any “correctional officer” that comes near me wearing “protective clothing” sends a clear and VIOLENT MESSAGE to me, he’s like saying, he FEARS me, he wants to HURT me, AND KEEP ME DOWN AND I DON’T HAFTA TAKE SHIT LIKE THAT!!!

    Uh…uh…I mean, it’s probably a really good policy to like, not encourage any sort of, you know, hostility and such, in the inmate population. At large. I mean.

    Thank you.

  2. jane m says:

    Well, this is what comes when Liberals are allowed to be in complete charge of running a country for 10 years…public safety and health, education and worst of all prison administration are reminisent of Alice in Wonderland.  Is there any hope at all that a conservative(left center to us) government will ever take over Canada again? What a fine mess.

  3. Russell says:

    Maybe it’s just that Canada thinks the best defense is a good offense, and are changing their policy so that every guard will be required at all times to stab any prisoner within lunging distance.

    Now that’s “dynamic security!”

  4. Kate says:

    Why on earth would you need a kevlar vest on a golf course?

  5. Eric Akawie says:

    Umm, isn’t the fact that he’s locked up in prison “a signal to the prisoner that you consider him to be a dangerous person?”

  6. jdm says:

    C’mon, Eric, they’re not in prison because they’re dangerous, they’re in prison because they did something inappropriate.

    Think of their sentence as a time-out, a time to reflect.

  7. Tongue Boy says:

    No, they’re in prison because their racial, ethnic, or sexual identity presents a discomforting critique to the prevailing Eurocentric culture and its mind-numbing conformity.

    Or something like that.

  8. nathan says:

    Hey, Styx is my favorite band, I can play about 80% of their songs on guitar.  You wanna form that tribute band regardless of your girth, you call me first.

  9. Jeff G says:

    Bitchin’.

  10. Coolings says:

    Could u all please get back here on mother earth, prisoners are offended if a guard wears a stab-proof vest? all u canadians are living in high sky.

    u all should come here and find what realy offends a prisoner, or go check other world wide C.I.A prisons in Iraq or Cuba. if getting stripped infront others is not offending hten i guess no prisoner is being offende.

    Thank You

Comments are closed.