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The “‘if Hank Moody were a meatball trying to chat up a plate of fettucine’ post” post

HM: “You ever hear that song about the meatball that rolled off the table and into a bush? That was me. Though it helped that the bush in question was already wet as a canoe bottom. So I can’t take all the credit…”

0 Replies to “The “‘if Hank Moody were a meatball trying to chat up a plate of fettucine’ post” post”

  1. B Moe says:

    As long as it wasn’t another bush…

  2. JHo says:

    This’ll bring out the rabble.

  3. TaiChiWawa says:

    Yet all the while he kept thinking of a steaming plate of linguini with clam sauce.

  4. DarthRove says:

    Sadly, this post is cast in a pop-culture reference I don’t understand. Is it possible to translate this into Star Trek-ese? I’m imagining something with Kirk, green Orion slave girls, and a cup of tribble-infested coffee, perhaps?

  5. The Lost Dog says:

    I LOVE BUSH! Especially wet ones…

  6. Diana says:

    Hold on to your meatballs, everybody … (fettucine is just flat spaghetti).

  7. Makewi says:

    If Natasha McElhone were a lesbian seeking to attend my prom, she would have my permission. Depending on what her date looked like, of course.

  8. RD says:

    Sadly, this post is cast in a pop-culture reference I don’t understand

    Hank Moody is a “misunsterstood” whining little douche on a Showtime series hardly anyone watches.

    Just like Jeff.

    Well, except that I can’t quit Jeff. Which is why I keep coming back, despite my ostensible loathing of the man. His beauty. It haunts me.

  9. Makewi says:

    It’s too bad the aliens didn’t take RD instead of Mulder’s sister.

  10. Jeff G. says:

    Soon I’ll have comment approval. Meantime, I’ll use some of my misunderstood genius to play with RD’s comments any way I choose.

    Asking him to fuck off out of here doesn’t seem to take, unfortunately.

  11. Dana says:

    Does the Five Second Rule apply to a meatball which has rolled off the table and under a bush?

  12. Jeff G. says:

    Shit. That last one cost a whole slew of Reverend Lovejoys.

    You’re like Bender in Breakfast Club. You can’t stop yourself. And the detention just keeps piling up.

    Only instead of scoring Molly R you wind up with Emilio Esteves all up in you.

  13. newrouter says:

    “I’ll be ready. Oh yes. I’ll be ready…”

    progg loser

  14. newrouter says:

    mr jeff g.

    looking at the lay of the land, will you be selling “buy squid™ pitchforks” bumper stickers anytime soon?

  15. newrouter says:

    pw folks how about a squid™ pitchforks brand bumper sticker design contest?

    design here

  16. JD says:

    Charles hearts RD

  17. Abe Froman says:

    It’s weird watching an anonymous nobody with obvious psychological problems trying to taunt someone who has a respected blog where lots of people congregate. It’s like a day old clump of dog shit making fun of the park.

  18. Jeff G. says:

    The funniest thing about the cockslap is how often it’s mentioned on lefty sites, or by lefty trolls in the comments.

    It’s like they needed me to say it so that they could pretend to be outraged, even as they use it themselves every chance they get.

    Like, for instance, RD here tonight.

    You usually have to wait until they can blackface someone or use “nigger” to see them so excited!

  19. Dana says:

    Our esteemed host wrote:

    Only instead of scoring Molly R you wind up with Emilio Esteves all up in you.

    I tasted my Lenten Friday dinner of peanut butter crackers and Mountain Dew on the way down; please don’t make me taste it again on the way up.

  20. Dana says:

    RD wrote:

    Many hot springs enthusiasts prefer the natural feel of simple wooden tub to these new fangled fancy superjet models, because it feels more like a hot spring, and elicits a feeling of tranquility in the soaker.

    Yeah, ’cause there’s really nothing that says nature quite like a splinter in your bare ass.

  21. Mikey NTH says:

    On top of spaghetti
    All covered in cheese
    I lost my poor meatballs
    When somebody sneezed.

    They rolled cross the table
    An onto the floor
    And then my poor meatballs
    Rolled right out the door.

    They in the garden
    And under a bush
    And my poor meat balls
    Were nothing but mush.

    If you love your meatballs
    All covered in cheese
    Hold onto your meatballs
    And don’t ever sneeze.

    (And Don’t Ever Sneeze.)

  22. Mikey NTH says:

    Condensed RD:

    *wibble*

  23. Carin says:

    These are the best RD comments EVA! He’s really taken his game up a notch. I’m just grateful I didn’t see what he said before they went through “the filter.”

    Think of it as an editor RD.

  24. serr8d says:

    rd is a minor league troll of the sophomoric variety; run-of-the-mill, bathtub ring dull, as predictable as a wind-up jack-in-the-box, and stupefyingly boring. A ‘2’ on the troll scale (given thor was an 8, eugenics nishi a 4, and poor guitar hero William a -1).

  25. Mikey NTH says:

    *wibble, wibble*

    (I am helping RD with future comments. I am a humanitarian like that.)

  26. Carin says:

    rd is a minor league troll of the sophomoric variety; run

    Well sure. Before Jeff tweeks the comments. Then they are the BESTEST EVA.

  27. fettucine says:

    fettucine is just flat spaghetti

    We prefer circularly challenged.

    No wait, that was last year, its  planarly enabled now.  Yeah that’s it.

  28. B Moe says:

    RD reminds me of the chickenhawk or one of Foghorn Leghorns other indefatigable little pissant nemesis.

  29. geoffb says:

    Foghorn Leghorns other indefatigable little pissant nemesis.

    There is a distinct flavor of a certain “B” word in there. Foghorn had a dog didn’t he?

  30. J."Trashman" Peden says:

    Foghorn Leghorns other indefatigable little pissant nemesis.,

    Who ever thought of responding to an Alphabet Soup? Instead of eating it?