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Recent Comments
- In The Mailbox: 02.28.23 (Afternoon Edition) : The Other McCain on Hey, longtime pw readers…
- In The Mailbox: 12.23.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll truly IS a sad, embittered psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- Danger on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
- In The Mailbox: 07.18.22 : The Other McCain on Patrick J. Carroll might be a psychopath
Yay!
I liked the “smells like corned beef and bible” one, and of course the one from hppyft.
I can’t wait for the next one!!
Go Meghan. Live Free or go down on Democrats!
Okay, I paraphrased. I’ll stop now.
goody goody gumdrops!
They’re Ramona’s Wiener Rolls is what they call them on the package even though they come in the Ramona’s Mixed Burritos pack of a dozen random burritos so maybe it’s something of a category error but I don’t care how rich you are $9.72 a dozen ain’t cheap. Plus if you want Tapatio on top you have to buy that extra. They freeze forever though so you could save some for special occasions.
That’s what I would tell Meghan if I felt like being nice to her and patient which I don’t. Meghan is the new Peggy.
I’m on Atkins now happy. Do they make tortillas out of bacon?
i lost 25 lbs on atkins
wait…
wait..
meaghan found it!
The McCain girl’s well-marbled buttcheeks would be approved Atkins fare. Fat is fuel for the Atkinser.
I never thought I would say this. if I knew this much about Meghan McCain months ago, I could have considered voting for Obastard. Just to keep that Brunhilde-shaped sack of corned beef and cunnilingus out of the White House. “cornbeef?” Someone ought to introduce Meg McMoron to “spell check.”
crious dude[hi]
’tis sno hard[hi!]
but sweet italian[hi!]
sausages
fill the gullet
like a samuel jackson threat
Why do I feel like I shouldn’t dump on Meghan? Mom’s dead, I know she’s not watching. Is she?
marble good [to suck on]
saliva is flava
pebbles be fine
I’m still reeling… Can this smooth-brained tweetering bucket of saturated fat really be serious? Is this really artfully disguised self-parody? I wish I could believe it, but even after checking it out I’m still dubious.
On the other hand, P. T. Barnum’s rule still applies.
Watch your six but don’t look back buttons, Bam-bam’s gaining on you. He don’t like folks fucking with his Pebbles.
White men turning on white men that is fighting the wrong enemy. You both are targets in an oppressive society that sees both of you as a dangerous threat.
Twitter, tweet, twat?
count chocala say go now
fruity pebbles be free
quick…cap’n crunch gave me a lifeboat
but aunt jemima just shook her head
“fool-u live in the land o milk and honey?’
waves her beat stick in my face
“slave driver- the tables have turned!”
i think i’m off breakfast…for awhile
#18
ROTFL. Thanks for getting coffee all over my keyboard.
Maybe I’d better twitter that.
praise allah for bacon smell
u cook/ i’ll clean
Orwell, I found the video because I occasionally do a google search to see if the term “twatting” is catching on yet.
Speaking of zaftig chicks, has Bill Clinton gotten a look at our Miss Meghan? Seems like his type if you know what I mean. And what with her penchant for progressive girlie men like John F’n Kerry, maybe Meg could re-verify the peculiarity of Bill’s equipment and save the GOP all at the same time!
blowhard, that was freakin’ awesome. It’s incredible how so many people can get caught up in turning trivialities into a simulacrum of discourse. It’s not even that revolutionary technically, and functionally twitter is just a blog with hundreds of short, meaningless posts. I guess this is the MTV of the intertubes. A monument to short attention spans and low-content thought.
do cartoon charecters [characters]
always have 4 fingers?
it’s disconcertin’
oppossable thumb wise
anyhoo-two thumbs up for vid-yo
three fingered salute
i think
therefore i…
long for ponds that…
i am here…
rush limb..
oh look/ a tree has limbs[giggle]
sam baugh was quarterback[frown]
slinging sam
oh look…
cleveland
did someone land on the moon?
sometime/somewhere
typing be hard..
look….
The world keeps getting louder. How does one find a signal, not to mention intelligent discourse, in the increasing ambient noise?
Hope you’re all well on this pretty day in Denver, by the way. Last Thursday’s blizzard was less distressing than the posted Twitter.
T&T
Yeah, Orwell, for me it’s a question of what I dislike most.
1. It’s a fad. And I’m a curmudgeon at heart. I came of age when it was cool and cutting edge to get your ear pierced. Like that was edgy, to do what everyone else was doing. It was always my theory that it was more hip to be able to get beer. The girls always thought so.
2. It’s devolutionary. Less information instead of more. Impossible to follow, with all discursive tracings ultimately leading to inanity.
3. People I like do it. Which I dislike. Imagine walking into Jimi Hendrix’s house and accidentally seeing him pop and locking to a Britney Spears song?
We can only talk to twitter-bots. Everyone else laughs at us.
happyfeets, didn’t SNL teach you not to taunt the happy fun ball?
barney frank hearts hot dogs
#8 They are called chicharonnes, (chee-chaw=row-nayes).
“i lost 25 lbs on atkins
wait…
wait..
meaghan found it!”
Sorry, but that’s fucking funny.
Hope he/she/it Twitters it.
Sometimes she looks good, other times she looks too thick. I generally like curves, though – I don’t like the Ethiopian look.
she’s a good ride
going up hills in the snow
she’s my…[at] traction
but downhill she shines
something ’bout nascar draft
and…[shout out to buff bob]
she helps me put the couch n the van!
she was..an american girl!
[it put’s the obama lotion on the skin..
and puts the taxes in the basket
put the taxes in the f’king basket!]
Meghan? I would hit it.
So would I !
Now that is one nice juicy booty.
Bobby Orr !
robert gordon orr
sweet! thanks jd
story…
i was working on a 40 story skyscrape
and i told the elevator [local union #4]
that i would only tell him what floor i wanted to go on
by naming boston bruins names[from 1972]
ie-stansfield-floor 17
jon bucyk-floor 9
dallas smith-22
u get the idea…
so i tells the mug…i’m so happy about this turn o events
i lay out my thinking… to him..
and he says-straight faced
“i don’t like hockey”
man-was i shutdown
I’ll admit that she has her charms.
buttons–I love reading your stuff.
if i go twitter
i ain’t coming back
just think ugly twin
140 carrotts
snark/ fat ass pad?
check/corn chex-honey nut chex
remind of the time i drove a cab
my exact words-“shit- i can be nice to anybody for 15 minutes”
thanks cowboy
story/ my naked body is full of them
i worked the 24’7 shift at 7 11-xcept it was called U-Totem
in santee calif
so they ‘manager’ shows me the ropes-blah blah
then we get to the nacho machine….
she says[ yeah-i worked for a woman]
and-sing to me- they[meaning customers] can take ALL the chips they want…but [[cheese dispenser] splat splat- only 2 splats
and she could not stress that enuff
two…splat splat=cheesey dollops
ok say i
so every friday at 3 am a biker dude who looked like lemmy/ 6 ft 8/ big dude
would come in
and splat splat splat cheese fuick splat
every chip was drowning in splat cheese..
so… after 3 weeks/ i took umbrage… and said.. hey bub
[i called him bob!’]
u wanna take it easy on the cheese?
he paused and looked at me like he was a gonna kill me!
so- lesson learned/ midnight shift at u totem
is best to shut up
cowboy- u started it!
u totem[ha] story number two
the door were on the right
the counter exit wa on the left
we sold alkyhaul/ beers/screwtop wine etc…
so
everytime a juvenile dlinquant would walk up to the counter..
i knew he would run…
happened often…
fast forward 3 months[ i be fired yo]
we sit around a pool party/ out of beers and money
i says
give me a ride to u totem/ keep the engine runnin’
people liked me that day
bobby orr snap
Not coming between a biker and his nachos is good advice.
don’t wanna hi jack thread/ just mumbling
4 real megs oh my god/oh my god!
i love protein wisdom!
oh god oh god [squeal/sha—Reek]
story
my dad was called “reeka”
cuz he sold vacumn cleaners on the side[eureeka]
but i told peeps we called him reeka cuz he smelled…
he beat me/ but…not enuff
I always wonder what it would be like to explain twitter to someone from the 50’s. And then watch how they cry when I tell them we can talk mindless shit across the world to each other for free through the ether yet still don’t have flying cars.
No moon colonies either, Tman.
ever see ur dad
who never drank
have three beers and a bristol creamn?
and do the twist?
therapy-my wallet is open
and no cities under the sea. *sigh*
K-Fed, Bret, & Flav – As Bruce Willis said in a movie – roll her in flour & look for the wet spot!
louchette..
my dam dam dam diddly dam
louchette…
i’m a fan fan fiddely fan
[sung/ ha/ stomped to claudette/ e bros/
buttons… ilu 2 bb. ;-D
i love my beat down dad
he lies on a hill w/ view/
my fnmily say
what to plant?
me say
corn!
my old man would laff if corn stalks be peepin upside
this is th end[beginnn’] of the pd buttons sag
u want mo’ stories?
check ur wisdom
thanks jeffy
be bi fo anna
goldstien!
lenny
baby was a black sheep
baby was a whore
u know she’s big
but she’s gonna get bigger…
baby baby baby was a rock and roll
NIGGER
outside is insanity
thats where i wanna be
a shy boy/ couldn’t lace up his skates
get em on the ice…
red light district….
eastwood got cape
bob got 4
Speak for yourself. If you don’t have one, it’s your own fault.
i had this professor once, a friend actually, and a sadistic surrogate mother. i was even her TA for a while/. she was a difficult person. to an infamous degree. challenging and demanding and sometimes abrasive. but she was very, very brilliant. and when she spoke it was wise to listen carefully. and she tried to convince me for a long time, based on nothing specific in the two film texts, but only on some gut level hunch or instinct or intuition of hers and her understanding of kubrick as an author, that ‘2001: a space odyssey’ and ‘a clockwork orange’ took place in the same narrative universe, on same planet, at the same moment. just, as seen from very different social and class perspectives.
i’m old. *le sigh* and when i was small it all seemed so very possible. and soon. and i’m disappointed for sure that more of the 2001 stuff has not yet come to pass. but also horrified and heartbroken that so much of the clockwork_O stuff *has.*
A good friend of mine was managing a Wendy’s when they first started having salad bars. This big ass dude comes in one night and asks him, “That salad bar is all you can eat, right?” My buddy says yeah, Dude says he wants it, pays his money then refuses the little bowl you get. Walks over to the freshly stocked bar and starts dumping all the containers of toppings into the big bowl of lettuce, then dumps a whole thing of salad dressing on it, picks up the big ass bowl of lettuce with all the shit now in it and walks back to a table and eat it.
The whole fucking salad bar.
We specialize in mindless shit.
so many buttons so little time. bookmarking.
i got in a toe accidsent once [once] the toe cops came
measured/
i me start whistlin’
some are…mmmm preachers…mmmm
every…mmm boy….. gunnysack,,,,
them PIGIEONS run to him….
hmmmmm/ w/out
hmmmmm/w/in…
u aint seen nothing like JEFF
JEFF/ GOLDSTIEN
if i could say a few words
i’d be a better speaker
The whole fucking salad bar.
*urrrp*
Rino-Barbie, heading to Toys R Us. Want one.
Kroger has Keebler® Meg Tweets™ on sale, three packages for four dollars!
my daddy thought he was kubrick
“paths o glory my son”
fuck! i got an older bro bro,,,
‘paths of glory’
should i say yes papi?
or nod?
i nod….
my nay boors call em nurse stanklove/ and thats when he built the ….
ya know
priests were on me 24/ 7/ cuz o my diggin arms
and lips…
so any hoo
[2 b continued]
rino barbie/ funny!
Where’s my JET PACK.
DAMMIT.
I’m waiting for Ann Coulter’s inevitable rejoinder. That should be spectacular.
#49 Tman, I’m from the fifties. Let me tell you stories about being halfway around the world talking mindless shit to each other…
Nah, you had to be there. You can keep your twitter. Reality is better.
I just love the “Live Free or Die” flag-dipped skulls. Nothing says edgy like skulls.
You Gotta Wonder Dept:
Did the ShamWow guy tell the hooker to “watch his nuts”?
OT:
“…After P’brain endlessly mocked and humiliated thor’s Dad â€
You’re a fucking liar, you genital wart.
Prove it.
FUCKING PROVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Fucking liar.
I’m trying to give a crap about Meghan McCain, but since I stopped giving a crap about her father months ago I’m having a hard time of it.
the bit is funny, though.
Anything that involves a happyfeet shout-out is automatically worth it.