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Embrace of Changeyness Makes Michelle Obama Proud [Dan Collins]

of America for the first time in her adult life.

And not only because Barack’s doing well. 

Headline of the Day: 
EX-HOMECOMING QUEEN BEATS DISABLED SISTER WITH PROSTHETIC LEG 
(In case you’re wondering, you laughed because you’re a horrible person). 

Big deal. Same thing happened to me when I wore my “Sure Would Dig Some Poontang” t-shirt to the YMCA.

22 Replies to “Embrace of Changeyness Makes Michelle Obama Proud [Dan Collins]”

  1. happyfeet says:

    People are feeling the same pain. If I really thought that I would iron my face I think.

  2. Dan Collins says:

    You’d be a very strange sort of superhero, hf.

  3. happyfeet says:

    Iron Man. I saw the trailer at Cloverfield.

  4. Darleen says:

    Dan

    I think the Quote of the Day in regards to Obamessiah comes from Susan Sarandon

    So I think he definitely has convinced people that he stands for change and for hope, and I can’t wait to see what he stands for.

    BWHAHAHAHAHA!

  5. Dan Collins says:

    Bwahahahahaha! indeed!

  6. Alcyoneus says:

    The Audacity of Trope.

    The trope of synechdoche, that is. Thank you Michelle for holding your life as a stand-in for all of us.

    What a bitch.

  7. B Moe says:

    You would have to really not believe in karma at all to say something like that out loud, I think.

  8. Alcyoneus says:

    Iron Man could be a great film, if they don’t introduce all that sappy relationship crap that ruined Spiderman. All we need is a little hate and revenge, mixed with the desire to save Little Johnny. Powdered Toast Man is really the model here.

  9. Alcyoneus says:

    I reject karma and kismet in favor of an expensive cafe at the end of time.

  10. Dan Collins says:

    The birth of a new phrase: “You can’t beat that with a prosthetic leg.”

  11. A fine scotch says:

    Dan,

    If your shirt had read “Pooter” rather than “Poontang”, you cleaned up at the Y. Kids don’t like to be reminded of Ted Nugent’s soul patch.

  12. Alcyoneus says:

    A woman engaged in violence? Why, that never happens. Strange.

    You can’t beat that story with a prosthetic leg. (h/t Dan)

  13. A fine scotch says:

    Drat,

    That should read “you would’ve cleaned up at the Y.”

  14. Harry says:

    This obviously spells the downfall of Obama. I just don’t see how he could possibly recover from this.

  15. Dan Collins says:

    Hey, Harry, we’re not taking sides. We’re enjoying the show.

  16. happyfeet says:

    Is Harry being serious? I think Harry is being sardonic. This can’t possibly actually be reported anywhere. That would be startling. Who’s Harry anyway?

  17. nishizonoshinji says:

    the black jackie kennedy.
    yup

  18. nishizonoshinji says:

    oh…and happyfeets is my hero

  19. Sean M. says:

    Let’s look at this seriously. Michelle Obama has never had hope in her adult life in spite of the fact that she’s married to a man who managed to be elected to the United States Senate, without any serious legislative qualifications, which we’re constantly reminded is the greatest deliberative body in the world.

    Wow, she’s got some really high expectations. Good for her hubby. Maybe not so good for the rest of us.

    And, yes, I know that probably makes me a racist. So be it.

  20. Rob Crawford says:

    Michelle Obama has never had hope in her adult life…

    What does that tell us about Barack?

  21. JD says:

    If the only way to ever have hope for this country is for one’s spouse to be a Presidential candidate, then all of the huddled masses are doomed to a lifetime of despair. Michelle and Barry O – Please deliver me from a lifetime of despair!

  22. Percy Dovetonsils says:

    “Kids don’t like to be reminded of Ted Nugent’s soul patch.”

    They should be, the little bastards, if they truly wish to learn how to rock.

    Ah, Michelle, my belle. Such a walking, talking stereotype of the urban post-nationalist sophisticate.

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