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Obama Superstar [Dan Collins]

Just for the record, months ago, when he first announced, I wrote IowaHawk about doing Obama Superstar:

Obama, Hey-Bama, Bama Bama, Obama, Hey-Bama, Obama!
Barry, Barry, won’t you rescue me?
Bama, Obama, Hey, Superstar!

But to do this properly, since I don’t really have the time (and my computer’s on the fritz), I’m wondering whether we can’t divvy the thing up, with people taking a song or two to parodize.

Barry, do you think you really should run?
Taking on Clinton’s just like playing with guns!
And face it, Barack, Bill is blacker than you’ll ever be.

Up to the Senate it was fine;
Too steep this presidential climb.
And they’ll hurt you if they think you’re kind.

On the plus side, though . . . think of the earmarks jokes.

10 Replies to “Obama Superstar [Dan Collins]”

  1. mojo says:

    How about “Barry” – (after The Who)

    Do you think it’s all right
    to leave the girls with uncle Barney?
    Do you think it’s all right?
    He’s had a few too many tonight.

  2. Moron Pundit says:

    I’d be down for rewording a song. Got one you’d want me to put out? This rewording stuff is one of my strong suits.

  3. Dan Collins says:

    Pick one. Clean Slate.
    Once we have a number of them, I suppose we’ll have to come up with a plotline and adjust them, but for now it’s all open season.

  4. Dan Collins says:

    Ow. Looks painful, man.

  5. Obama Superstar!

    Dan Collins wants lyrics.

    I’ve got the ‘chop.

  6. Pablo says:

    “This Jesus Must Die” is telling in that so little of it needs to be changed.

    PRIEST ONE

    Good Bubba, the campaign waits for you.
    The spin docs and the pollsters are here for you.

    BUBBA

    Ah gentlemen and Hillary, you know why we are here.
    We’ve not much time, and quite a problem here

    MOB (outside)

    Obama! Superstar!
    Obama! Superstar!
    Obama! Superstar!
    Obama! Superstar!

    HILLARY

    Listen to that howling mob of voters in the street!
    A trick or two with Oprah, and the whole town’s turned on me.

    ALL (inside)

    He is dangerous!

    MOB (outside)

    Barack Hussein Superstar!

    ALL (inside)

    He is dangerous!

    MOB (outside)

    Tell us that you’re who they say you are.

    PRIEST TWO

    The man is in town right now to whip up some support.

    PRIEST THREE

    A rabble rousing mission that I think we must abort.

    ALL (inside)

    He is dangerous!

    MOB (outside)

    Barack Hussein Superstar!

    ALL (inside)

    He is dangerous!

    PRIEST TWO

    Look Bubba, they’re right outside our yard.

    PRIEST THREE

    Quick Bubba, go call that Blitzer ‘tard.

    BUBBA

    No, wait!
    We need a more permanent solution to our problem.

    HILLARY

    What then to do about Obama of Chicago?
    Miracle wonderman, hero of fools.

    PRIEST THREE

    No riots, no army, no fighting, no slogans.

    BUBBA

    One thing I’ll say for him — Obama is cool.

    CARVILLE

    We dare not leave him to his own devices.
    His half-witted fans will get out of control.

    PRIESTS

    But how can we stop him?
    His glamour increases
    By leaps every moment; he’s top of the poll.

    BUBBA

    I see bad things arising.
    The crowd crown him king; which our Hillster would ban.
    I see blood and destruction,
    Our elimination because of one man.
    Blood and destruction because of one man.

    ALL (inside)

    Because, because, because of one man.

    BUBBA

    Our elimination because of one man.

    ALL (inside)

    Because, because, because of one, ’cause of one, ’cause of one man.

    PRIEST THREE

    What then to do about this Obama-mania?

    CARVILLE

    Now how to we deal with a magic negro king?

    PRIESTS

    Where do we start with a man who is bigger
    Than Jesus was when Jesus did his water into wine thing?

    BUBBA

    Fools, you have no perception!
    The stakes we are gambling are frighteningly high!
    We must crush him completely,
    So like Jesus before him, this Obama must die.
    For the sake of the nation, this Obama must die.

    ALL (inside)

    Must die, must die, this Obama must die.

    BUBBA

    So like Jesus before him, this Obama must die.

    ALL (inside)

    Must die, must die, this Obama must, Obama must, Obama must die!

  7. B Moe says:

    JOHN EDWARDS sings:

    I don’t know how to love him.
    What to do, how to move him.
    I’ve been changed, yes really changed.
    In these past few days, when I’ve seen myself,
    I seem like someone else.
    I don’t know how to take this.
    I don’t see why he moves me.
    He’s a man. He’s just a man.
    And I’ve had so many men before,
    In very many ways,
    He’s just one more.
    Should I bring him down?
    Should I scream and shout?
    Should I speak of love,
    Let my feelings out?
    I never thought I’d come to this.
    What’s it all about?
    Don’t you think it’s rather funny,
    I should be in this position.
    I’m the one who’s always been
    So calm, so cool, no lover’s fool,
    Running every show.
    He scares me so.
    I never thought I’d come to this.
    What’s it all about?
    Yet, if he said he loved me,
    I’d be lost. I’d be frightened.
    I couldn’t cope, just couldn’t cope.
    I’d turn my head. I’d back away.
    I wouldn’t want to know.
    He scares me so.
    I want him so.
    I love him so.

    I can’t see changing a damn thing.

  8. Pablo says:

    I can’t see changing a damn thing.

    Scary, ain’t it?

  9. Steve says:

    This is the song that Obama reminds me of.

    http://www.hamienet.com/midi7595_Superstar.html

    Barack Obama, Superstar!

    Who are you, what kind of change are you are talking about?

    Barack Obama, Superstar,

    Who are you, what kind of change are you are talking about?

    Barack Obama, Superstar

    Who are you, what kind of change are you talking about?

    Adoph Hitler could really rally those masses, and Olde Joe Stalin could make them walk barefoot through broken glasses, And Ho Chin Minn, he could bring the crowd in, and that Po Pot he know how his words could make them hot…

    Now do you believe?

    Now Marshall Applewhite made them think that they were going to go to Heaven on a comet, and David Koresh he sent his faithful on a path to Armageddon. And of course we all know about olde Jim Jones. His people did what he told em and that Kool-aid got overflowin…

    Now do you believe? (the mesmerized crowd shouts back Yes we Believe) Now do you believe?(louder) Yes, we believe! Hallelujah now get that sister some water (the front row of women then faints).

    Barack Obama, Superstar,

    Who are you, what kind of change are you are talking about?

    Barack Obama, Superstar

    Who are you, what kind of change are you talking about?

    Now do you see yourself as as Che’s Second comin… Or maybe you set yourself up on a path even higher. Perhaps you do see yourself as the new Messiah, start a new religion with you as its idol.

    Do you believe?

    Cults of personalities well they very rarely end well and with yours it could set the earth a trembling… For when you come unglued as all cult leaders in the end do, you could push that nuclear button and set the earth afire..

    Barack Obama, Superstar,

    Who are you, what kind of change are you are talking about?

    Barack Obama, Superstar!

    Who are you, what kind of change are you talking about?

    Barack Obama, Superstar!

    Turing America into one big Manson Family

    Barack Obama, Superstar!

    Turning America into one big Manson Family

  10. Clay Poe says:

    Barack is an evil man who is convincing his idiotic supporters that he will do this country good. Hitler did the same damn thing, and he is going to lead this country to oblivion damn it. If this country is going to survive the test of time Barack’s body must be made a corpse before he gains the power of presidency.

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