Being overweight may not kill you, but it could lead to obesity, U.S. health experts cautioned on Wednesday in response to research suggesting that being a bit heavy does not raise the risk of death.
As Taranto would ask, “What would we do without experts?”
House Approves Broad Protections for Gay Workers  (Heh.)
Poll: Clinton lags in quest for male voters
Being overweight could lead to obesity? Who would’ve thunk it?
Where can one apply for these kind of “expert” positions?
In case anyone needs an expert, for anything, here are some of my sample opinions.
1) Having an IQ lower than Caric may lead to stupidity.
2) Being larger than Michael Moore may not be really healthy.
3) Having more botox than Nancy Pelosi is not really the best idea.
4) Voting for Hillary might not be what is best for your pocketbook.
I think we need these kinds of experts like a fish needs a bicycle. Which is to say, if it’s an environmentally conscious fish, he really, really needs it.
I think we’re missing the word “premature” in this assessment since the risk of death is approximately 100% according to my data.
Shirley McClaine’s “lives” and Elvis’ flying ‘nana sandwich notwithstanding.
Speak for yourself, wishbone. I’m planning to live forever; so far, so good.
Somewhere, Irene Cara is singing your tune, Squid.
And damn you for that.
According to the BMI, Doug Barnes – Mr Universe 2007, scores a 29.5 and is .5 points away from being obese. I wonder if he keeps a crash cart on hand when he’s competing.
It’s Doug Burns, not Barnes. I’m not body building expert. However, my BMI is lower than his. HOW’S THAT TASTE FATTY?
Dude.
People still pay attention to health experts?
Why?
And suddenly, I’m flying through the air in leg warmers. Who says llamas get all the good curses.
SarahW – Now that you’ve got the legwarmers, all you need is a ripped up sweatshirt, someone to hose some water on you and the floor, and you are all set. I volunteer.
I do not want to live forever. Getting old kind of creeps me out. The idea of Depends is sooooooooooooooooooo unappealling.
Couldn’t you have hidden that Medusa below the fold or something?
Now I’m going to have go Oedipal and gouge out my own eyes with forks. I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy, but I think I’ll need a lobotomy to get rid of the mental image of that. Thanks, Dan!
afinescotch – That pic of the Hillary bust is certainly not nearly as bad as when she was flashing cleavage on the Senate floor, no?
Every time I see someone say “gouge out my eyes with a fork” I think of Steve Martin in Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, where he has to try to eat with a cork on the end of his fork. Good stuff.
Inversely, being chroniclly and progressively underweight may lead to starvation.
Karen Carpenter could not be more right if she tried.
Hillary solved her problem here in Michigan by getting the Dem to all drop out of the primary except her. I predict it here and now; if Hillary gets elected, Jenny Granholm will be rewarded with a position in Washington. Will she even finish out her term as Governor here in Michigan? I’m giving that a 50/50 chance. Granholm is another one of those talentless, ambitious females brought to us by the womyn’s movement.
Carin – Why would they do that?
State Dems decided they wanted to move up the Michigan primary w/o permission of big brother. So, the national party came down and told ’em ALL not to run in Michigan at all. Everyone complied except Hillary. And, about a week later, Jenny Granholm announced her support for Clinton.
I predict it here and now; if Hillary gets elected, Jenny Granholm will be rewarded with a position in Washington.
That’s one way to get rid of her, I suppose.
You know, In five years, you’re going to be blown away!
Money quote from the Breitbart video: “People have come from as far away as Sacramento to look at our beavers.”
Sorry. That’s not a sculpture of Hillary. That’s clearly Jimmy Carter with an upswept bouffant and tits.
Hillary and ET.
Separated at birth?
Is that patterning on Hillarys! Boobs! a jpeg artifact, or does she have some groovy tribal tattoo on her knockers? Like Jimmy Carter does.
R Sherman – Don’t be disrespectful towards Liz’s beaver. Be kind ;-)
I think it’s some sort of masonry brassiere, Thin Man.
Possibly Hil is sufficiently affected by gravity that even in chiseled stone, they tend to sag.
Damn you, Dan Collins.
Damn you.
Yeah, and someone needs to tell Hillary! that she has a huge booger up her left nostril. You’d think her people would have have checked for that before they showed her the gorgon.
Our friend Scott is not faring well. This makes me sad. His blog is called Acephalous. You make click and fix.
Boy, if the TV camera adds 10 pounds, then the sculpter adds about 20 years. She looks a little like Imogene Coca in her last Carol Burnett Show appearance and she was like in her 80’s.
Yeesh!
Who put boobs on that bust of Kucinich?
If someone would put together a handy chart for me, I could decide how I want to die and then choose the appropriate weight.
The gay discrimination law makes me want to vomit. It really does. Discrimination laws are purposely constructed to protect persons who were born a certain way and it also protects religios practice, a notion clearly provided for the in the Constitution. Until scientifically proven different (and I do not believe it will ever be proven), homosexuality, transexuality, bisexuality, etc is a choice made by an individual person. I did EEOC discrimination work for about a year and I’d say every 4th or 5th call I received was from homosexuals claiming they were fired for discrimination. Of course, only about 1 in every 50 actually had a claim based on some sort of bias against homosexuals- most of them were fired for stealing money, showing up late/not showing up for work and all of the other things that get people fired. Under this new law, any person who gets fired can claim to be fired on the basis of their sexuality,even if their sexuality is not well known. Oh sure, once litigation is filed and it gets down to brass tacks, it will be obvious that the person was fired for being a slackass, not for being gay, but it ties up the EEOC, government lawyers, company lawyers and the court system for a year or two before the basis for the complaint comes to the forefront. Merely the threat of homosexuality will be brandished like the Shield of Perseus in front of employers and the openly gay will no doubt use this as an tool to keep them from getting fired, in the event they don’t show up for work, steal money, piss off customers, etc.
Its a ridiculous law. The discrimination laws are already used and abused by minorities- trust me, I could tell you some ridiculous stories about the things miniorities come up with (or make up) when they file these EEOC claims. Gays want to be seen as people but they also want special privileges that sets them apart from other people. I hope this proposed law blows up in the democrats big fat faces.
Sorry about my post- it was serious thought/rant in a sea full of levity.
Isn’t the real problem more that this legislation opens up a path to litigation based on underrepresentation of gays in a particular workplace as de facto proof of discrimination? That’s so gay.
Weight Cause of death
80lbs bulimia
140lbs diphtheria
180lbs slovenia
220lbs pulmonary olestra
260lbs thrombosis of the whopper
300lbs gravitational collapse
Isn’t that a sculpture of Taun We from The Phantom Menace?
If you can’t elevate the discourse, levitate it instead.
Thin Man, what was that you were saying about a 260-pound throbbing whopper?
If it’s any comfort, growing old is mandatory but growing up is optional!
Could we leave Algore out of this?
kelly: That’s clearly Jimmy Carter with an upswept bouffant and tits.
Exactly what I’ve thought every time I’ve seen it.
Matt, Esq.: homosexuality, transexuality, bisexuality, etc is a choice made by an individual person.
So you could wake up tomorrow morning and decide to be gay? Start your day off by saying “Wow. I’m all about Da Cawk from now on!”? Really?
Interesting.
“So you could wake up tomorrow morning and decide to be gay?”
I can’t even get drunk enough tonight to decide to be gay, personally, so I think tomorrow is probably right out.
“Until scientifically proven different (and I do not believe it will ever be proven), homosexuality, transexuality, bisexuality, etc is a choice made by an individual person”
Discriminating against homosexuals certainly is a choice. So is religion. Except there we have the benefit that they are all fiction.
Please. In the real world mostly people just discriminate amongst homosexuals.
andy – There also happens to be that little benefit in the Constitution regarding religion, or did you forget about that?
I go back and forth on the whole genetic vs. behavior discussion on homosexuality. Either way, whether you are born that way, or make a conscious decision as to your sexual preferences, I have seen nothing that entitles them to increased protection within our system of laws.
Matt – I have handled EPL claims, and the ratio of claims that allege discrimiation that turn out to be about anything but the alleged protected class is remarkable. I find nothing to quibble with in your analysis of that.
“andy – There also happens to be that little benefit in the Constitution regarding religion, or did you forget about that?”
For state action right. You noticed that?
“Either way, whether you are born that way, or make a conscious decision as to your sexual preferences, I have seen nothing that entitles them to increased protection within our system of laws.”
Its protection by the category of actual or perceived sexual orientation. So no one has “increased protection.”
Right, andy. This is really a law to protect heterosexuals in the workplace. Does your head hurt, like, constantly?
“This is really a law to protect heterosexuals in the workplace.”
The law protects them exactly the same: they are protected from discrimination against their actual or perceived sexual orientation. Whether they are actually or perceived to be homosexual, heterosexual, or whatnot.
B Moe: I can’t even get drunk enough tonight to decide to be gay, personally, so I think tomorrow is probably right out
Right. Most people can’t switch between da vajayjay and da cawk the way you’d go to Subway for lunch rather than Arby’s. Such people do exist, of course. We call them “bisexuals”.
Which, of course, is a completely separate issue from whether someone’s sexuality should put him or her in a legally-protected employment class.
Doesn’t the mere existence of bisexuals bring into question the genetic aspect of this? Maybe they just got all of the genes.
I always thought that bisexuals just wanted to double their chances of getting laid.
I support drivers licenses for all gays and bisexuals.
“The law protects them exactly the same: they are protected from discrimination against their actual or perceived sexual orientation. Whether they are actually or perceived to be homosexual, heterosexual, or whatnot.”
I want some of that female impersonator lettuce that they’re raking in down Miami way. When I applied they told me I look more like Andrew Bogut than Grace Kelly, but I know they dinged me because I’m hetero. I’m goin’ back and gettin’ PAID!