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He-eee was a friend of mine… (or, Jimmy Breslin shows his passion)

Nuance:

When anybody you elect tries to end the war, Bush blocks all intentions with a veto or threats of a veto that prevent it. And his Supreme Court is ready to validate whatever he does, this court with its five Catholic justices, and a chief who falls on his face a couple of times that we know of.

Ah, the passion of the liberal journalist!

Sure, Breslin has been farting dust since the NYPD caught David Berkowitz, but still — he’s representative of an era, and more importantly, of a kind of crusading liberal media lion.

The rest of his column, predictably, is pedestrian anti-Bush boilerplate, a tired rehearsal of draft dodging quips and “he’s the stupid” jokes, but I thought it interesting that one of the Good Guys — you know, an iconic New York social justice type crusading for righteousness with a pen that is mightier than any sword (unless, of course, the sword has been beaten into a plowshare and is being used as a giant serving tray to bring freshly dug beets to the collective) — seems to have a hard time with Catholic Justices. And epileptics.

Of course, that doesn’t make him anti-Catholic. Why, not only is he a lapsed Catholic himself, but I bet he remembers just where he was when John was shot, and I bet he literally broke down and wept when they got Bobby.

But these Catholics, well —

Cancerous. And John Roberts? Sorry, but stuff some uncooked corn kernels into his mouth and wait for him to have his next spastic fit, and you’ll have a human Jiffy Pop deciding the most important social issues of our lifetime!

And, well, that’s just not the kind of America Breslin can get behind

(h/t John H)

54 Replies to “He-eee was a friend of mine… (or, Jimmy Breslin shows his passion)”

  1. happyfeet says:

    You know, when it comes to it, this “blog trolling” concept is kind of impotent. What’re you gonna do.

    Here’s some choice Wikipedia copy:

    In 1990, Breslin received an e-mail characterizing one of his Newsday columns as sexist. He responded in the Newsday newsroom with an ad hominem attack by promptly denouncing the sender of the e-mail, Ji-Yeon Mary Yuh, a female Korean-American reporter who was a colleague of Breslin’s at Newsday, as a “yellow, slant-eyed cur.” He also called her what the The New York Times would only describe as “an obscene anatomical reference.” The full quote, reported by Helen Zia in Asian American Dreams, 2000, Farrar, Straus & Giroux, is “The fucking bitch doesn’t know her place. She’s a little dog, a little cur running along the street. She’s a yellow cur. Let’s make it racial. She’s a slant-eyed cunt.” Breslin also appeared on the Howard Stern show to further air his grievances. Newsday suspended him for two weeks without pay, even though he offered an apology to the young reporter.

  2. happyfeet says:

    That’s pretty crude, really. A link would have done the trick I think. Sorry.

  3. Synova says:

    Heh. Crude but necessary.

    Would you take an apology from this guy?

    I honestly think that some people are so invested in their own self-identity as non-bigot, not-prejudiced, non-racist/sexist/elitist, and all around tolerant person that they honestly don’t even *notice* when they are mocking an epileptic.

  4. Kirk says:

    I think this guy is so self-important that he carries the narrative around in his stomach–whatever he spits up is the acceptable precisely because his word is infallible decree.

    How did such a catholic hater become Pope?

  5. molyuk says:

    Jimmy Breslin’s still alive?

    Huh.

  6. Rick Ballard says:

    “Jimmy Breslin’s still alive?”

    Just the body. Brain death occured decades ago.

  7. Dan Collins says:

    It’s just gauche of those Catholics that so many of them believe in justice. By which I mean, inconvenient.

    And epileptics . . . icky.

  8. Sean M. says:

    BECAUSE OF THE OPUS DEI!

  9. Jeffersonian says:

    Obviously pre-Imus days. Plus the Yellow Peril steadfastly refuses to play the victim, so they’re of little use to people like Breslin.

  10. It's gettin' deep in here.... says:

    Like his female(?) counter-parts, Molly Ivins and Helen Thomas, Bresliln ceased to be relevant several decades back. Maybe Helen and Jimmy will soon join the old Texas jenny-mule for a celestial masage-a-twat.(my french may possibly be a little rusty)

  11. TIm P says:

    The less our progressive ‘friends’ have to say of any substance, the more vitriolic they become.
    Breslin just must have forgotten to take his meds, again.

  12. Josh says:

    How crazy of an early adopter was Jimmy Breslin that he was getting emails in 1990? Was that like the first email ever sent?

  13. Merovign says:

    You know, every time I find out that some leftist icon of “social justice” whatever turns out to be a foul bigot, I’m less surprised.

  14. jaed says:

    (Intra-office email systems were common in the late 80s and early 90s. Doesn’t mean he was actually on the Intarwebs – this would have been just a local email system.)

    God, I feel old sometimes…

  15. CraigC says:

    Jimmy Breslin has always been the poster boy for, well, people like Jimmy Breslin. A cartoonish buffoon who thinks he’s smarter and hipper and better than the booboisie, but is really just a blinkered old fart spouting long-dead faux-populist malarkey and tiresome, cliched red-diaper-baby boilerplate. One can almost understand it coming from someone of his advanced age who never got out of the 1950’s, but it’s really only different in style and tone from the crap you can read at any lefty website or coming out of the mouths of Dem politicians.

  16. Josh Miller says:

    1)”He never had enough money
    To pay his room or board
    And he was a friend of mine”

    2) “Ca-Ca-Ca-Catholics?!” – Moral Oral, from Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim.

  17. nichevo says:

    1) Breslin is, of course, Catholic, of the Irish flavor. Thus he feels entitled, and perhaps is entitled, to poke at “his own” sacred cows as Jeff or I might poke at Jews, or baldilocks or Chris Muir at blacks. Whether we would…anyway he seems to revel in it. But enough on that.

    2) He retired a while back. I believe it was in 2004 and his last column was n election eve. He yammered about how it was going to be Kerry in a landslide, neener neener, and then signed off – evidently in no mood for comeuppance. Brave, that.

    3) So now he’s back? If I read Newsday I would have to take a look. It used to be a decent paper but seems to want to out-Times the Times in seeking a liberal demo. We used to chuckle at Grandpa when he called Newsday anti-Semitic but in later years I found it harder to argue.

    4) Jimmy, stick to One-Eye, those columns were fun.

    5) Sucks to get old, don’t it?

  18. The Thin Man says:

    “When anybody you elect tries to end the war, Bush blocks all intentions with a veto”

    Holy Crap Batman, you’d think the constitution would provide some way to stop all those checks and balances from working against the liberal agenda!

  19. Major John says:

    Dear Mr. Breslin, “override of veto”. Google it!

  20. Web Reconnaissance 09/01/2007…

    A short recon of whatÂ’s out there that might draw your attention updated throughout the dayÂ…so check back often. This is a weekend edition so updates are as time and family permits….

  21. David M says:

    Trackbacked by The Thunder Run – Web Reconnaissance for 09/01/2007
    A short recon of what’s out there that might draw your attention updated throughout the day…so check back often. This is a weekend edition so updates are as time and family permits.

  22. Big Bang (Pumping you up) says:

    – Breslin, naw hes a remnrnt of the 60’s and early 70’s – Those herclyon days of covering the sports beat as a cub reporter, slamming down shooters afterhours, and humping whatever unfortunate 10 dollar hooker he could corner in a 5th avenue alleyway.

    – He once did a series of “scathing, hard hitting” expose leeds on the crime bosses of NY. Eventually they grabbed him for an hour and explained to him what a piece of shit he was, and how many laughs he provided the mob with, and then put a gun to his head, decided he wasn’t worth the price of a bullet, and threw his stupid ass back out on the street. After that the joke around the burrows was, so fucked he was lower than a slug.

    – I used to have a friend who worked in an assisted living hospice in upstate NY. The facility named a high security section the “Brelin wing”, and when he heard about it he was all charmed, thinking they admired his work. The friend told me it was hillarious. Apparently you had to be crazier than a technocolored chicken, to get a ticket on that happy-time ride. whajt a freeking tool.

  23. Darleen says:

    Breslin is, of course, Catholic, of the Irish flavor

    and rarely do you meet a people so conflicted about their religion

    [former spouse of a 2nd gen. Irish-American Catholic]

  24. Semanticleo says:

    I think his ‘Catholic’ adhom is reserved for that special sort of
    Papist. You know, the ones who actually like the taste of those little wafers? The cafeteria catholics still believe it took more
    than six days to create the heavens and the earth.

  25. Darleen says:

    Cleo

    Nice little bigotry there based on pernicious stereotype and devoid of any sense of history.

    Par for the course with you.

  26. Semanticleo says:

    “The cafeteria catholics……..”

    Their souls are in mortal peril for heresy. Are they victims of Opus Dei bigotry? I think you bogey’d that one, Darlink.

  27. me says:

    “Sorry, but stuff some uncooked corn kernels into his mouth and wait for him to have his next spastic fit, and you’ll have a human Jiffy Pop…”

    Damn that’s good stuff.

  28. Darleen says:

    Cleo

    Maybe you should get out more often and talk to actual “wafer loving” Catholics instead of getting your “information” from Christophobic, anti-Papist, Left cult sources.

    To paraphrase Santayana: Newspapers ignorant of history are condemned to reprint it. How else should we interpret the recent headline, describing Pope John Paul II’s address to the Pontifical Academy of Sciences, “Pope Says Evolution Compatible with Faith”?

    There’s not much “news” there. Fifty years ago Pope Pius XII said almost the same thing in the encyclical Humani generis: “The Teaching Authority of the Church does not forbid that, in conformity with the present state of human sciences and sacred theology, research and discussions, on the part of men experienced in both fields, take place with regard to the doctrine of evolution, insofar as it inquiries into the origin of the human body as coming from pre-existent and living matter.”

    While not exactly canonizing Darwin, Pius XII did imply that the theory of evolution isn’t necessarily inimical to Christianity. Certainly he didn’t reject evolution altogether. How then do we explain the big headlines when John Paul II says basically the same thing in 1996?

    One answer: the alleged war between science and religion is good copy. So any chance to chronicle another fight between them is pounced on by the media. The Big Bang? That proves God’s existence-so much for those infallible scientists who think they can explain everything without God. Evolution? That proves human beings come from slime-so much for those infallible theologians with their dogma about man being the image of God. Which side gets the better play depends on who appears ahead at the moment. *

    Concerning cosmological evolution, the Church has infallibly defined that the universe was specially created out of nothing. Vatican I solemnly defined that everyone must “confess the world and all things which are contained in it, both spiritual and material, as regards their whole substance, have been produced by God from nothing” (Canons on God the Creator of All Things, canon 5).

    The Church does not have an official position on whether the stars, nebulae, and planets we see today were created at that time or whether they developed over time (for example, in the aftermath of the Big Bang that modern cosmologists discuss). However, the Church would maintain that, if the stars and planets did develop over time, this still ultimately must be attributed to God and his plan, for Scripture records: “By the word of the Lord the heavens were made, and all their host [stars, nebulae, planets] by the breath of his mouth” (Ps. 33:6).

    Concerning biological evolution, the Church does not have an official position on whether various life forms developed over the course of time. However, it says that, if they did develop, then they did so under the impetus and guidance of God, and their ultimate creation must be ascribed to him.

    Concerning human evolution, the Church has a more definite teaching. It allows for the possibility that man’s body developed from previous biological forms, under God’s guidance, but it insists on the special creation of his soul. Pope Pius XII declared that “the teaching authority of the Church does not forbid that, in conformity with the present state of human sciences and sacred theology, research and discussions . . . take place with regard to the doctrine of evolution, in as far as it inquires into the origin of the human body as coming from pre-existent and living matter—[but] the Catholic faith obliges us to hold that souls are immediately created by God” (Pius XII, Humani Generis 36). So whether the human body was specially created or developed, we are required to hold as a matter of Catholic faith that the human soul is specially created; it did not evolve, and it is not inherited from our parents, as our bodies are.*

    Anything more from your anti-Papist bigotry you’d like to assert, Cleo? Maybe you’d like to now demonstrate your knowledge of those icky religious Joooooooos.

  29. Semanticleo says:

    Darleen;

    So did John Paul and Benedict absolve Cafeteria Catholics of any venal sins for enjoying the act of sex as an end in itself? Or is procreation the only viable excuse for engaging in it?

  30. Darleen says:

    The cafeteria catholics still believe it took more
    than six days to create the heavens and the earth.

    Move your goalposts much, Cleo?

  31. Semanticleo says:

    I believe you changed the subject away from the Opus Dei-ers on the Supreme Court with their institutional bigotry. Bigotry as ‘two way street’ is the topic YOU chose. Deal with it. The question stands;

    “So did John Paul and Benedict absolve Cafeteria Catholics of any venal sins for enjoying the act of sex as an end in itself? Or is procreation the only viable excuse for engaging in it?”

  32. Donald says:

    That was one fucking great song. 680 Club Atlanta around 1980 (?). Ole hollow eyed Jim Carroll, channeling Lou as much as possible. Awesome (Cartman style)!

  33. Jeff G. says:

    My washing machine is broke. You think if I stick Judge Roberts’ head in the water when he’s having a fit I can get up a good agitation?

    It’d be holy water, of course. Because I really like my socks.

  34. mishu says:

    Miss Cleo, you must really miss your psychic friends days don’t you?

  35. Saint Dymphna says:

    I heard that shit.

  36. mishu says:

    “So did John Paul and Benedict absolve Cafeteria Catholics of any venal sins for enjoying the act of sex as an end in itself? Or is procreation the only viable excuse for engaging in it?”

    Well, you know you must kill the kid (or clump of cells) if you just screwed for the cum because of the HYPOCRISY!!!!111!!ONE!

  37. McGehee says:

    Why is Miss Cleo so solicitous of the souls of people she’d just as soon see herded into rail cars and trundled off to North Dakota?

  38. Spiny Norman says:

    Why is Miss Cleo so solicitous of the souls of people she’d just as soon see herded into rail cars and trundled off to North Dakota?

    For the sake of picking a fight. Nothing else.

  39. So Jimmy Breslin’s still alive?

    redux

  40. MarkD says:

    Isn’t he Olberman’s father? That degree of venom isn’t learned, it’s inherited.

  41. TomB says:

    Cleo, are you trying to make a point, or are you just flinging poo?

    ‘Cause you don’t do either very well.

  42. BumperStickerist says:

    Jeff –

    Samurai Appliance Repairman runs, arguably, the greatest site in the history of teh interwebs.

    http://fixitnow.com/wp/category/washer-repair/#SlideFrame_1

    Yours, hell, *mine*, included.

  43. Darleen says:

    Mz/Mr Cleo believes that The Da Vinci Code is in the non-fiction part of the library.

  44. Big Bang (Pumping you up) says:

    ‘Djah ever notice how religion haters, such as Cleon De-vegan, are the all-time “experts” on all things religious. Something like Olberman doing house call brain surgery, except done viciously, and with glee. Theist assholes. Far as I’m concerned Cle-hole, you can go resurectum yourself – dork.

  45. happyfeet says:

    It’s nice to think that Jimmy Breslin will leave this world wholly convinced it’s a far worse place in spite of his his lifelong efforts.

  46. Semanticleo says:

    Pig farmers, when asked how they can stand the smell, often say they find the smell sweet, given time.

    Likewise when someone named ‘Big Bang’ uses big words like
    ‘asshole’,Cle-hole, and resurectum to facilitate his self-espression. it is………………………..

    *sweet*

  47. Major John says:

    Shouldn’t you be bothering Tom Maguire?

  48. Additional Blond Agent says:

    Sure, Breslin has been farting dust since the NYPD caught David Berkowitz, but still — he’s representative of an era, and more importantly, of a kind of crusading liberal media lion.

    Crusading lion, eh? So *that’s* what they’re calling raging alcoholics these days. >8^>

  49. Great Mencken's Ghost says:

    “My washing machine is broke. You think if I stick Judge Roberts’ head in the water when he’s having a fit I can get up a good agitation?”

    Have Tim Johnson gargle his inauguration speech. That orter suds up real good.

  50. Big Bang (Pumping you up) says:

    Ah….a Theist pig-farming expert, all rolled into one…that must explain the smell…..

  51. Patrick Chester says:

    Anyone sense some sort of impotent frenzy from folks like Cleo? As if they want to destroy all they deem evil but can’t so they use all this snarkiness and vitriol to make themselves feel better?

  52. happyfeet says:

    It’s the impotent frenzy of people who can abide nothing less than the final solution.

  53. happyfeet says:

    What they should do instead is listen to Don Henley cds and talk about artisanal cheeses.

  54. Major John says:

    “talk about artisanal cheeses.”

    OK, 41 years on this Earth and I believe that is the first time I have ever seen that phrase. Who says you can’t learn anything new?

Comments are closed.