March 19, 2014

Ho hum, Amanda Marcotte hates babies and demands you notice [Darleen Click]

By golly, the full-moon just passed and Mandy takes to scribbling one of her profanity-laced, click-bait screeds full of the usual narcissistic blather about babies=bad, abortion=good and if you disagree, its only because of The Patriarchy(tm)

I don’t particularly like babies. They are loud and smelly and, above all other things, demanding. No matter how much free day care you throw at women, babies are still time-sucking monsters with their constant neediness. No matter how flexible you make my work schedule, my entire life would be overturned by a baby. I like my life how it is, with my ability to do what I want when I want without having to arrange for a babysitter. I like being able to watch True Detective right now and not wait until baby is in bed. I like sex in any room of the house I please. I don’t want a baby. I’ve heard your pro-baby arguments. Glad those work for you, but they are unconvincing to me. Nothing will make me want a baby.

And don’t float “adoption” as an answer. Adoption? Fuck you, seriously. I am not turning my body over for nine months of gaining weight and puking and being tired and suffering and not being able to sleep on my side and going to the hospital for a bout of misery and pain so that some couple I don’t know and probably don’t even like can have a baby. I don’t owe that couple a free couch to sleep on while they come to my city to check out the local orphans, so I sure as shit don’t own them my body. I like drinking alcohol and eating soft cheese. I like not having a giant growth protruding out of my stomach. I hate hospitals and like not having stretch marks. We don’t even force men to donate sperm—a largely pleasurable activity with no physical cost—so forcing women to donate babies is reprehensible.

Sperm = unborn child? Hmmm… I’m thinking someone flunked high-school biology. But I digress …

This is why, if my birth control fails, I am totally having an abortion. Given the choice between living my life how I please and having my body within my control and the fate of a lentil-sized, brainless embryo that has half a chance of dying on its own anyway, I choose me.

But, of course. After years of Princess Marcotte writing covering topics from A to MEMEME, I bet that’s a real revelation!

I never cared much whether she wanted kids or not. Considering her anger issues and the general unhappy unpleasantness of her, I would pity any child inflicted with her toxicity as a mom.

But I ask, if she is truly serious about never wanting a child, why hasn’t she removed the risk of pregnancy by having her tubes tied? It isn’t a big deal, an outpatient procedure with less recovery time than sinus surgery.

Either she is slightly ambivalent about forever closing the door on parenthood or she’s deliberately courting the chance of getting pregnant so she can dine on writing about her wonderful, fulfilling abortion at some point.

Really, the world is a sadder place for having a desperately unhappy person such as Mandy in it.

[I got the quotes from other places, I won't give the poor dear any extra traffic.]

Posted by Darleen @ 8:25pm
48 comments | Trackback

Comments (48)

  1. >We don’t even force men to donate sperm<

    ‘Pervasive Culture of Sexual Violence’

  2. Does Dear Mandy think there is a man who could maintain an erection long enough to impregnate her in the first place? Or does she think she will be the second known case of parthenogenesis in recorded history?

    A guy can only hear so much about “PIV=rape” and “aborshuns = KEWL” before he starts casting for those other fish in the sea…

  3. babies giggle at almost anything i love that about them plus they love music

  4. i definitely like soft cheese but I like lots of other things too to where I wouldn’t even miss it if there was a sudden catastrophic soft cheese shortage

    pro-tip: lots of regular not-soft cheeses get squooshy-soft if you heat them up a little – yum!

  5. >I don’t particularly like babies. They are loud and smelly and, above all other things, demanding. <

    says soulless cretin. how much of an asshole do you have to be state this
    publicly?

  6. you go koch/soros wymans!!11!!

  7. Alas, if only her parents had thought the same way.

  8. alas if the proggtard party had a soul?

  9. hey putty putin shoot amanda? save the “west”

  10. good allan i be pat b.!

  11. a lentil-sized, brainless embryo

    Ironically, said hypothetical embryo’s mom has a lentil-sized brain — which is nevertheless several million times larger than her heart.

  12. proggtardia today: eugenics edidition

    >I like not having a giant growth protruding out of my stomach.<

  13. You really have to wonder what the hell happened to her that she’s so damaged.

    Before the progressive women’s studies cultural marxism revolutionary feministism programming convicted her in the righteousness of her damage, I mean.

  14. Why doesn’t she just look in the mirror and say, “I don’t have any problem with bashing a toddler’s brains out,” and get it over with. The whole appeal to the very early stage when there isn’t a brain yet is pointless kabuki.

  15. Hmmm… I’m thinking someone flunked high-school biology.

    Basic anatomy and human sexuality too. Except for the mechanics bit.

    I like not having a giant growth protruding out of my stomach.

  16. In Amanda’s world I’m out of my mind because a co-worker of mine is probably due in a month or less and I think it’s great.

    I really hope she decides to come back to work though, for the purely selfish reason that she does a great job and takes some of the pressure off the rest of us.

  17. in failifornia if you want tasty queso though you have to make your own, pretty much

    this is cause they stupid

  18. hey isn’t this the hooch what was gonna work for John Edwards but got fired like a bitch?

    John Edwards loves him some babies like nobody’s business

    so

    that’s just one of life’s little ironies i guess

  19. I like not having a giant growth protruding out of my stomach.

    Then stop eating the baby, Fatbastard.

  20. I don’t know the deal between Jeff and PJMedia –before my time an’ all that. But it seems to me that everybody over there is playing his tune and singing his song lately.

    Case in point, Richard Fernandez in his own piece commenting* on the wages of sin linguistically incoherent anti-foundationalist rhetoric mistaken for Real Life (TM) and vice versa:

    I really don’t blame president Obama. He is who he is. And he told everyone what he was going to do right up front. I am going to fundamentally transform America. Abolish unproven missile defense systems. Delay or stop all future combat systems. Take our bombers off hair trigger alert. You didn’t build that. Etc..

    The Kos boys heard ‘im. They got it loud and clear. Same with the Occupy Crowd. They didn’t think he was kidding. But all the pundits said, “nah he can’t mean that. He’s only saying that as rhetoric. He’s going to be a traditional, centrist democrat.”

    And was he?

    But it’s not just Obama the elite weren’t listening to. When Putin said, I’m going to take the Crimea. I’m going to restore the glory of Russia, the reaction was the same. “Nah he can’t mean that. He’s only saying that as rhetoric.”

    When China says it’s going to claim the whole South China sea, do we listen? Do we listen when Kim Jong Un and Islamic fanatics say they’re going to turn America into ash and kill every Jew and take over Israel?

    We hear the words, but our understanding is: “nah he can’t mean that. They’re only saying that as rhetoric.”

    Each step of the way they’ve told us exactly what they mean to do. And each step of the way we’ve decided they don’t mean it, even when they do.

    We don’t need Kennan. We need our ears cleaned.

    Seems like “fundamental unseriousness” is now deadly serious business.

    *I regret that I am unable to link directly to the comment –severely outdated hardware and software. It was the top rated comment earlier –don’t know about now.

  21. Marcotte acts as if she is the only person in the history of Mankind to ever have any trepidation about children. I certainly worried about the ways in which my life would change the moment my spouse and I discovered our family would increase by one. (The plans for the three week canoe trip in Gates of The Arctic National Park went out the window in favor of nursery furniture, for example.) Certainly, she’s well within her rights to refuse to accept those changes. What’s troubling, though, is that she implies that those who choose differently are idiots. I can appreciate her argument; She, however, cannot fathom the rationale for the opposite position, to the point where she disparages those who weigh the pros and cons and chose differently, and does so with an extraordinary amount of vitriol. It is that vitriol which demonstrates that she’s been scarred in some profound way.

  22. Kids are loud, smelly and demanding?

    Why am I having trouble distinguishing between Mandy and her description of a baby?

  23. Mandy Marcunt so needs to be stripped and thrown in a cell with a gang of Muslim terrrorists….we might extract more information and confessions that way.

  24. Especially the brainless part?

  25. The most shocking aspect of her tirade is the implication that their are guys in her world willing to sleep with her.

  26. I actually prefer that she not have a baby. Ever.
    The gene pool is f-ed up enough as it is. I want her malignant genetic code to die with her.

  27. Mandy would make an excellent Nazi. She hates everything.

  28. “Adoption? Fuck you, seriously.”

    Who gives a shit about your angry tweener slogan of “fuck you” Amanda?

    It’s a human life you are dismissing.

    You’re a privileged, whining, aging but never maturing, irresponsible idiot who claims she can’t get access to $9 birth control at a Walmart because of a war on women.

    Not that you qualify as a woman beyond a perfunctory statutory chronological definition.

    No creature is so doomed as one too stupid to feel any need to care for its young.

    You are a sad, un-fuckable, wanna be MTV loser, and should be insulated from issues of reproduction, child care, and treated like the un-ready perpetual child you are by any potential sex partner not made of plastic.

    Fuck you Amanda, or rather don’t EVER fuck a piece of garbage idiot like you.

  29. Seriously, what kind of screwed up world are we going to live in when porn, bullshit, scamming, diddling, and banging have totally replaced actual sex? 20% suicide rate? Massive over-self medication? A fluid and sub-tribal ‘packs and loners’ social structure?

  30. If you’re on a PC you can press ALT and type 0153 and get ™

  31. In theory, by taking herself out of the gene pool the future will belong to those who disagree with her. I guess that is why propaganda and suppressing other opinions is so important to her types.

  32. No one wonders where the aversion to stretch marks comes from?

  33. Meanwhile, over by Stacy’s, stand amazed at the page-boyed Amanda!

  34. I almost (not really) feel sorry for Mandy. She has nothing to look forward to in her golden years.

  35. g the door on parenthood or she’s deliberately courting the chance of getting pregnant so she can dine on writing about her wonderful, fulfilling abortion at some point. –

    This. It’s the ultimate affirmation. She will be able to wear her coat-hanger necklace with pride.

  36. Amanda Marcotte is at risk of becoming pregnant?? Seriously?

  37. She’d like people to think so.

  38. daveinsocal says March 20, 2014 at 9:02 am I actually prefer that she not have a baby. Ever. The gene pool is f-ed up enough as it is. I want her malignant genetic code to die with her.

    I suspect her malignancy is something learned rather than genetic.

    No child should be punished with her as a parent, though.

  39. Didn’t we recently decide some epigenetic traits were heritable?

    (agreed that her issues aren’t natural –at least not wholly)

  40. if amanda had a baby the first thing she would probably notice is how gosh darn cute it was

    after that she would let it suckle at her breast for so it would stop crying

    after that she could still have sex in any room of the house to where her hungry vagina wasn’t deprived of the attentions it needs for many many months still while the baby remained a more or less oblivious infant and also indulge her craving for soft cheeses

    and they lived happily ever after the end

  41. Dayum, feets! You almost becoming normal again. What gives?

  42. Actually, foul mouthed misogyny is the normal. Foozle, peabnut bubber and baby wazzles are come-ons for the marks.

  43. No one wonders where the aversion to stretch marks comes from?

    That sure sounds like something The Patriarchy™ would be responsible for.

  44. palaeomerus, in the coming meltdown, of which Mandy is viscerally aware, the only useful skill Mandy has is making babies. And Mandy is well past her prime in that department, so, rather than admit she’ll be left to starve in the street, due to her lack of negotiable skills, Mandy rails against the very things that would make her a valuable commodity.

  45. Sadly, guins, you are right. I wonder if he is a douche in real life, or saves it for spittle-flecked foaming remarks on the blog. Teh Funny is greatly outweighed by Teh Mysogyny.

  46. “We don’t even force men to donate sperm”

    And in return we don’t even repeatedly discharge 12 gauge shotguns at your torsos when you stupidly come near us. It’s a form of cooperation that borders on mutualism.

  47. Pingback: The First Street Journal.

  48. Wow. The people commenting over there are fucking insane. The pro-life side is lovingly referred to as “forced birthers”.

    They’re just flat out delusional

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