Ho hum, Amanda Marcotte hates babies and demands you notice [Darleen Click]
By golly, the full-moon just passed and Mandy takes to scribbling one of her profanity-laced, click-bait screeds full of the usual narcissistic blather about babies=bad, abortion=good and if you disagree, its only because of The Patriarchy(tm)
I don’t particularly like babies. They are loud and smelly and, above all other things, demanding. No matter how much free day care you throw at women, babies are still time-sucking monsters with their constant neediness. No matter how flexible you make my work schedule, my entire life would be overturned by a baby. I like my life how it is, with my ability to do what I want when I want without having to arrange for a babysitter. I like being able to watch True Detective right now and not wait until baby is in bed. I like sex in any room of the house I please. I don’t want a baby. I’ve heard your pro-baby arguments. Glad those work for you, but they are unconvincing to me. Nothing will make me want a baby.
And don’t float “adoption” as an answer. Adoption? Fuck you, seriously. I am not turning my body over for nine months of gaining weight and puking and being tired and suffering and not being able to sleep on my side and going to the hospital for a bout of misery and pain so that some couple I don’t know and probably don’t even like can have a baby. I don’t owe that couple a free couch to sleep on while they come to my city to check out the local orphans, so I sure as shit don’t own them my body. I like drinking alcohol and eating soft cheese. I like not having a giant growth protruding out of my stomach. I hate hospitals and like not having stretch marks. We don’t even force men to donate sperm—a largely pleasurable activity with no physical cost—so forcing women to donate babies is reprehensible.
Sperm = unborn child? Hmmm… I’m thinking someone flunked high-school biology. But I digress …
This is why, if my birth control fails, I am totally having an abortion. Given the choice between living my life how I please and having my body within my control and the fate of a lentil-sized, brainless embryo that has half a chance of dying on its own anyway, I choose me.
But, of course. After years of Princess Marcotte writing covering topics from A to MEMEME, I bet that’s a real revelation!
I never cared much whether she wanted kids or not. Considering her anger issues and the general unhappy unpleasantness of her, I would pity any child inflicted with her toxicity as a mom.
But I ask, if she is truly serious about never wanting a child, why hasn’t she removed the risk of pregnancy by having her tubes tied? It isn’t a big deal, an outpatient procedure with less recovery time than sinus surgery.
Either she is slightly ambivalent about forever closing the door on parenthood or she’s deliberately courting the chance of getting pregnant so she can dine on writing about her wonderful, fulfilling abortion at some point.
Really, the world is a sadder place for having a desperately unhappy person such as Mandy in it.
[I got the quotes from other places, I won’t give the poor dear any extra traffic.]