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“Gitmo Looking for Instructor to Teach Terrorists Watercolor Painting”

That headline is a bit hysterical-sounding and frankly misleading, and I’m disappointed, because I’ve come to expect better from CNS News.

First off, there are no “terrorists” at Gitmo.  Because we don’t want to unfairly and negatively stigmatize these political and economic perpetrators of man-caused disasters.

Second, Obama made it a campaign promise in 2008 to shut down Gitmo — it being a symbol of maltreatment of the noble Other and the denial of human rights — and the left (including then state senator and later Senator Obama) made it a priority that this impediment to multicultural understanding and mutual ethnic and religious respect be treated as a blight, a stain on the honor of liberty, using it as a bludgeon against warmongering GOP torturers from about 2002-2003 on.

Therefore, it follows that the left, having been in power since 2008 and having for two years had a supermajority in Congress and control of the presidency, immediately closed down Gitmo, making any call for an “instructor” to teach “watercolor painting” absurd.

Because a closed-down, empty detention center doesn’t have the need for watercolor instructors.  Or resume-writing instructors.  There being no one to teach to use watercolors or write in active, compelling, bulleted language.

So.

I think we can fairly dispose of this story as an example of right-wing hyperbole and fabulism.  Because QED, and &tc.

11 Replies to ““Gitmo Looking for Instructor to Teach Terrorists Watercolor Painting””

  1. serr8d says:

    Oh, I’m sure they can communicate quite well in bulleted languages. Just let them out, they’ll prove it soon enough.

    As for watercolors? Send cans of spray paints and that Fairey fellow.

  2. leigh says:

    Watercolors? Feh! Let them have the Tom Sawyer treatment: buckets of white wash and a six inch brush. Make those living quarters sparkle like a new dime!

  3. happyfeet says:

    happy trees are key

  4. newrouter says:

    ” Teach Terrorists Watercolor Painting”

    i think depicting nature is haram in moeland

  5. dicentra says:

    Any watercolor teacher who doesn’t mind having the brushes repeatedly jammed into her eyesockets is more than qualified.

  6. sdferr says:

    . . . Wellpers, it’s June: do you know where your Tropical Cyclones are forming?

  7. Blake says:

    dicentra, interesting thought. I think we have a lot of people in the Senate and the House that should volunteer to teach watercolors at Gitmo. After all, those are the same people that sympathize with terrorists.

    Think offering to sharpen the ends of the brushes is going too far?

  8. dicentra says:

    I keep thinking about the nurse whose patient grabbed her through the bars and smashed her face repeatedly against the bars, and 16 plastic surgeries later she was still not doing so well.

  9. guinspen says:

    Sounds like a job for lemonyellowfoot, then.

  10. SBP says:

    “i think depicting nature is haram”

    Any animal or human being, usually. Abstract floral/leaf patterns are generally okay.

    Quite a number of Christian and Jewish groups have had similar rules, and some do to this day.

    From what I’m seeing the prohibition in Jewish groups seems to be mostly against three-dimensional or “2.5D” sculpture or engraving (i.e., taking “graven” quite literally), while some Christian groups (some Mennonites and other Anabaptists) don’t even allow 2D drawings or photographs.

  11. sdferr says:

    Right here, to answer my own question.

Comments are closed.