NAACP calls Hallmark graduation card “racist”; egrets prepare for yet more hypotheticals
A graduation card sold at local stores has been pulled from shelves after a civil rights group raised concerns about the content. The group claims the card’s micro-speaker plays a greeting that’s racist.
It is a graduation greeting from Hallmark that says, “Hey world, we are officially putting you on notice.”
Members of the Los Angeles NAACP did take notice. As characters known as “Hoops” and “Yoyo” banter on, African American leaders hear offensive language.
“And you black holes, you are so ominous. Watch your back,” the card vocalizes.
“That was very demeaning to African American women. When it made reference to African American women as whores and at the end, it says ‘watch your back,'” said Leon Jenkins of the Los Angeles NAACP.
When Hallmark was reached by phone, they said the card is all a misunderstanding. The card’s theme is the solar system and emphasizes the power of the grad to take over the universe, even energy-absorbing black holes.
The card company says the card speaks about the power the grad will wield.
“The intent here is to say that this graduate is not afraid of anything,” explained Hallmark spokesman Steve Doyal.
Yeah, well. Reasonable — and so reasonably offended — blacks heard something different from what you intended them to hear. Right there. In the text — which, as it isn’t bound to any intent, says what it says. That the conventions of a certain segment of the black community differ from those adopted by Hallmark is Hallmark’s failing. What’s “racist” is what someone hears as racist — else there’s no reason to pull the card from stores.
And before any of you chalky white folk chime in on this, remember: It’s a black thing. You wouldn’t understand. And if you are black and still disagree, you are inauthentic, anyway. So shut up.
Me, I just thank God no child or his dog were injured in the making of this textualist performative.