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Orlando Bloom wants you to vote for Change

And by “you,” presumably he means either geeky twenty-somethings who like to dress in pirate garb, or gay boys.

Didn’t we once fight a Revolution so that we didn’t have to listen to assholes like this?

Somebody needs to push past his security entourage and dump Mr Bloom’s tea into his giant swimming pool.

h/t MKH

66 Replies to “Orlando Bloom wants you to vote for Change”

  1. you’d think he might at least act American.

  2. Bob Reed says:

    Maggie,
    He can’t act…

  3. Bob Reed says:

    Makes you wonder why so many foreigners are involved in O!s campaign, doesn’t it?

    I guess it helps in the socialist cocooning…

  4. but… but… he’s soooooo pretty.

  5. hlem says:

    So, the foreigners and communists are coming for all your precious bodily fluids, eh?

  6. AJB says:

    Foreigners like Obama, therefore Obama must be bad.

    Whatever.

  7. Jeff G. says:

    Whereas Bloom has already swallowed yours, right hlem? Or is it the other way around?

    PARIS HILTON IS MY MASTER! I VOTED WITH LINDSEY LOHAN!

  8. Sdferr says:

    Wouldn’t you say it would depend on which foreigner AJB? Were it Maggie Thatcher praising Obama you wouldn’t have a qualm or two?

  9. Jeff G. says:

    Yeah. We don’t like us no furriners. A-hyup.

    If you want cartoons, try TVLand.

  10. Old Texas Turkey says:

    he’s not american either.

  11. happyfeet says:

    His skin looks really soft too. Like a girl’s. We should all do masks while we wait for them to announce McCain is our new president I think. Maybe do those biore strip thingers too.

  12. If you want cartoons, try TVLand.

    Cartoon Network, might be a more sure thing. or, we have a Funimation channel here…. FOREIGN CARTOONS!!!! course they’ve bastardized them for American audiences. heh.

  13. Old Texas Turkey says:

    sorry wrong thread

  14. Jeffersonian says:

    Come to think of it, but Rivendell and that elf mountain were kinda creepy collectivist backwaters.

  15. Kirk says:

    Kip could slap the shit out of that guy.

  16. John Cheshire says:

    I wish I could see the videos you post. I know you use a MAC so I downloaded quicktime on my home computer and my laptop but neither on will play the videos.

    I feel like the kid in class who is laughing because everybody else is, while nervously looking around and hoping that they are not laughing at him. Of course I could just feel that way because I voted today. I literally had to hold my nose to vote for McCain. I vomited in my mouth a little bit when I did and promptly went home and took 3 showers to wash that dirty feeling off. So, you know, it could be that.

  17. John, it’s a youtube vid. it runs using Flash… I had problems with it yesterday when adobe updated the plug-in. It took many attempts at re-loading it, but it eventually worked. hope that helps.

  18. lee says:

    I literally had to hold my nose to vote for McCain

    Going by how I felt a few months ago, I thought I would have to do the same. Surprisingly it went down like fine wine.

    I guess everything is relative.

  19. TaiChiWawa says:

    Orlando Bloom would be a fine name for a florist.

  20. kelly says:

    Or a manicurist.

  21. Jim in KC says:

    Or an appetizer.

  22. Hvy Mtl Hntr says:

    He has a reel purty mouf.

  23. kelly says:

    Or a fluffer.

  24. kelly says:

    Or felcher.

  25. lee says:

    Or a Obama WH intern.

  26. Pellegri says:

    but… but… he’s soooooo pretty.
    Fortunately it’s a quality I can admire if he’s bound and gagged.

    Not that I have bondage fantasies about Orlando Bloom or anything…

  27. JD says:

    Pellegri – I have missed you. Much.

    Are you sitting there with your arms crossed ‘neath the ample bosom?

    ;-)

  28. JD says:

    Kelly – I think that it is more of a felching fluffer.

  29. Vladimir says:

    Elves are not Americans.. they’re Middle Earthers.

  30. Darleen says:

    John

    it shows up on FoxFire

    for some odd reason, this is one of the only sites that won’t run the embeds on my IE.

  31. Darleen says:

    yikes… Firefox!

    (I’m home with a fever … )

  32. John Cheshire says:

    Maggie,

    Thanks for the tip but it still shows as a big emtpy box with a little red X in the top left corner. I do not have any problems with other sites that embed U-tube videos. I am stumped.

    BTW the only people who care what Bloom has to say spend most of their time squeeling while watching High School Musical.

  33. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Gimli: “Never trust an elf!!”

    And, Gimili was son of Gloin ya know.

    Sage advice I’d say. Very wise.

    Plus…Orlando Bloom?

    Gayest. Pirate. Ever.

    The sexual tension was all between him and Johnny Depp.

    Gotta love Disney.

    Disney Exec: “You know what this movie needs? A butt-pirate!”

  34. Dan Collins says:

    Wait. Is Sauron running?

    I wrote in Burge/Goldstein, just like the rest of you!

    Guys?

  35. happyfeet says:

    Crap I forgot about that.

  36. If you ask me his name sounds like some kind of prosthetic vagina. “This minxy model is the Sausalito Lilly, and to the left, that saucy little number is the Orlando Bloom”

  37. John Cheshire says:

    Darleen,

    I downloaded firefox and now instead of a little Red X I get a message telling me to “click to download plug-in” which I have done. Still no progress. I blame it on Bush.

  38. happyfeet says:

    He’s just a ditz. Harmless really I think. I like him more better than the Leo DiCaprio version anyway. That one has an attitude and I’m not comfortable with him emoting at me all the time.

  39. Chris S. says:

    Not all that different from the Tom Cruise Scientology vote- Barack Obama does have that Soka Gakkai International demographic all locked up . . .

  40. kelly says:

    JD: Don’t blame me. I don’t really know what those words mean. I got them from alppuccino. Are they naughty?

  41. happyfeet says:

    I’m bored with the whole America Decides thing. Just tell me if I live in a third world backwater or not so I know what to pick up for dinner. Jeez. I think I’m gonna assume we are still America and just have buffalo burgers. What do people in Baracky’s America eat anyway? I’m not doing organic crap I’ll tell you that right now and anything grown anywhere near this city isn’t going in my mouth. Tots. I bet we’re in for lots of tots.

  42. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “I wrote in Burge/Goldstein, just like the rest of you!”

    I wrote in Sowell/ Cheney. Goldstein gets hired as POTUS Cheif of Staff, BUT, when Pelosi or Reid are summoned to the Oval, he may or may not be ordered by the President to shoot their legs, submit ’em and make them tap.

    This will be how President Sowell will “Veto.”

    Oh, and as COS, Jeff will have to tend the White House Rose Garden and bury in there whatever body Cheney tells him too.

    Mulch, compost, dead terrorist, it’s all good.

    Also, he has to stock Camp David with good scotch and 70’s porn.

  43. happyfeet says:

    And there’s no way Baracky is up by 15 in Pennsylvania. That’s completely retarded. If Pennsylvania had some overwhelming urge to be a dirty socialist commune you’d figure someone would have noticed already. There’s plenty in Philadelphia what scan for signs of that sort of thing all the time.

  44. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “If you ask me his name sounds like some kind of prosthetic vagina. “This minxy model is the Sausalito Lilly, and to the left, that saucy little number is the Orlando Bloom.”

    So Orlando Bloom is basically a walking, talking Georgia O’Keefe?

    Explains a lot.

  45. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    yikes… Firefox!

    OTOH, the FoxFire browser will run on a computer you’ve whittled out of a tree stump with a Bowie knife.

  46. Jeff Y. says:

    Yeah. Tea bag that bitch.

  47. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “And there’s no way Baracky is up by 15 in Pennsylvania.”

    I’m with feets. All that means at this point is Barry’s up 15 in Philly…Shocka!

  48. happyfeet says:

    What else is gay I think are exit polls.

  49. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Barry would be up by 15 in Philly if the place had been nuked this morning.

  50. […] Jeff Goldstein reports that it’s all over….Orlando Bloom urges you to vote: “And by “you,” presumably he means either geeky twenty-somethings who like to dress in pirate garb, or gay boys.” Hey! I love Orlando Bloom, as long as he’s wearing a leotard and a blond wig. […]

  51. Pellegri says:

    I missed you guys too, JD. ♥

    And maybe my arms were crossed… You can bet if I had a trussed-up Orlando Bloom in the house, I would be doing just that with a frown of stern disapproval to go with it.

    Socialisms?? In my house??

  52. happyfeet says:

    Is it just me or does anyone else keep getting this thread mixed up with the shove a dick in his mouth one?

  53. Dawn says:

    Screw all of you! Orlando Bloom rocks and is sooooooo fine! Who cares if he’s not American? He’s British and sexy so I’m with him. Vote for change. Go ahead, yell at me, but I couldn’t take all the shit you were talking about him. So yell at me.

  54. lee says:

    Go ahead, yell at me, but I couldn’t take all the shit you were talking about him. So yell at me.

    Dawn, you ignorant slut!

    Nah, I can’t do it sweety. You’re just too cute!

    Can you post a picture? Pleeeease?

  55. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    “Orlando Bloom rocks”…”Go ahead, yell at me, but I couldn’t take all the shit you were talking about him. So yell at me.”

    We’d prefer to just make fun of you if it’s all the same to you.

  56. guinsPen says:

    Dawn…

    go away you’re nO! good for me.

  57. guinsPen says:

    Tainted goods, as it were.

  58. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Wait…

    Anybody know Dawn? I haven’t seen her, but if she’s commented here before “Orlando” I’ll apologize right now for being a smartalecky dick.

    On the other hand, if she runs an Orlando Bloom website and Googles mentions of his name every 30 seconds (like an Obama loonie), and showed up here to “defend him,” all bets are off.

  59. On the other hand, if she runs an Orlando Bloom website and Googles mentions of his name every 30 seconds (like an Obama loonie), and showed up here to “defend him,” all bets are off.

    That’s my guess, LYBD.

  60. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Psst… Dawn, honey? He’s gay.

    So…perhaps you might want to refocus your libido on a more appropriate target.

    Just sayin’.

  61. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Well maggie, I totally get her.

    In her bedroom she probably has a poster of Obama on one wall, and a poster of Orlando Bloom on the other…their eyes look at her all sexy like…follow her around the room.

    I get it.

    I had the same posters. Except mine were Linda Evangelista and Stephanie Seymour.

    And, ya know…then I graduated Jr. High and went to Highschool.

  62. lee says:

    Thanks for making me feel dirty guys.

    Dawn, I will have you know, is a hot 30 year old I imagine.

    And saucy!

  63. pdbuttons says:

    orlando-obama
    orlando-obama
    which to choose?
    if only you’d clone me

    but now that the evilbushfundies are out
    mybe i’ll get my wish

  64. lee says:

    pdbuttons is nishi!

    All you surprised should be embarrassed.

  65. guinsPen says:

    wish

    A turtle in every pot?

Comments are closed.