Garrett: “This might have nothing to do with the question, I admit, but — from my perspective — I’d explain it this way: if a building were on fire, and it came down to my having to save either, say, Kirk Cameron, or Spider Pedro, the guy who scores me my rock, Cameron would be a Left Behind potato crisp.
“Harsh, I know. But deep down, a person has to know what it is that matters most — you know, who and what they really are about — no matter what corporate-branded logistical tripe their theme song may be peddling. Plus, the fire would help me to torch up without having to bum a lighter off some filthy street person. So, like, there’s that…”
****
cross-posted at National Lampoon’s The Zaz Report.
Comment by Semanticleo on 8/29 @ 9:09 am #
Another paradigmatic post.
Palin is HOT!!!
Is Cap’n Ahab still a womanizer? If not, I question his choice.
Comment by Carin on 8/29 @ 9:10 am #
Oprah represents so much of what I loath about women. Ugh. Makes me ashamed of my gender.
Comment by Jeff G. on 8/29 @ 9:15 am #
I’m nothing if not paradigmatic.
Plus, symmetry. If one requires such.
Comment by mojo on 8/29 @ 9:24 am #
Symmetry is highly over-rated. Like Oprah.
Comment by scooter (still not libby) on 8/29 @ 10:02 am #
Someone should market Left Behind potato crisps. “They’re RAPTUROUSLY delicious!”
Comment by scooter (still not libby) on 8/29 @ 10:03 am #
Also, Tom Robbins has interesting things to say about symmetry in “Even Cowgirls…”
But then, he has a lot of interesting things to say about a lot of things.
And bullshit can be really interesting. But I digress.
Comment by Jeff G. on 8/29 @ 11:26 am #
Probably not the best post to use to debut on NL.
Oh well. I have a self-destructive streak.
Comment by the Other Ken on 8/29 @ 11:30 am #
I have a Melvins CD on which Leif Garret sings “Smells Like Teen Spirit.†This, I suppose, is completely irrelevant except to say that I cried my eyelashes off when I heard it.
Comment by Jeff G. on 8/29 @ 11:35 am #
He’d eat them cried off eyelashes for a pint and a cheeseburger.
Poor lad.
Comment by Pablo on 8/29 @ 11:37 am #
Heh. I hope it pays more than change.
Comment by Jeff G. on 8/29 @ 12:22 pm #
Oh, I’m a wealthy man now, Pablo.
Just always click over and they’ll have to keep me on.
Comment by Barrett Brown on 8/29 @ 12:31 pm #
“Probably not the best post to use to debut on NL.”
Sure it is. We’ll take the whole shebang, all or nothing, anything, ecstasy’s the birthright of our gang, etc.
Comment by dicentra on 8/29 @ 12:32 pm #
Nice gig, Jeff. It might take awhile to build an audience, so keep going. I’ll click over a few times a day to make it look good.
Comment by mojo on 8/29 @ 12:33 pm #
Would that be the company that bought the name of the company that brought you the “National Lampoon”?
Comment by Jeff G. on 8/29 @ 12:34 pm #
We shall return the poon to prominence, mojo. Anna Nicole’s ghost will help.
Comment by mojo on 8/29 @ 1:22 pm #
I’d love to see the ‘poon resurrected, I just doubt the Messiah will be willing to lay his hands on. Maybe we should remane it the “National Lazarus”…
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Thanks for such an helpful post.
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