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One last visit (cranky-d)

“Bam, bam, bam.”

I tried to ignore the noise.

“Bam, bam, bam.” A pause.  “I know you’re in there,” he yelled.  “You may as well open the door.  If you don’t I will.”

I sighed, and got up to open the door.  The sound of gunfire didn’t go well with my neighborhood, and I thought it better to avoid it if possible.  The stairs creaked as I made my way down to the front door.  I opened it and looked down at him.  His beady little eyes were partially shaded by a tiny fedora sized for his tiny head.  A new affectation, maybe, or perhaps he’d been into the noir again.

“Well, invite me in, jackass,” he said.  I said nothing.  He walked past me and up the stairs.  I closed the door and followed.  By the time I got upstairs to my place I could already hear the sound of glass contacting glass.

“Is this all you have?” he yelled.

“Yes, that’s all I have,” I said.  “I wasn’t expecting company.”

“You mean you weren’t expecting me.” I heard the sound of liquid splashing into a glass.  “I’ll pour one for you, too.”

“Thanks.” I sat down, and he brought me a drink.  “So, what do you want?”

“Nothing, really, just saying goodbye.”

“I don’t like the sound of that.  The last time I saw you, you threatened to kill me.”

“You took me seriously?” He waved it off with a paw.  “I was just pissed about what you and the other posters had done to the place.  Now that Jeff is really coming back, it’s all okay again.”

“That’s a relief,” I said and took a long swallow.

“You’re damn right it is,” he muttered.  We sat quietly for a while. 

“So, what have you been doing with yourself?” I asked.

“Not much, keeping a low profile.  Did a bit of dancing at the club again.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, really.  I had to.  You guys have driven the site ratings way down and ad revenue is totally shot.  There’s barely enough money left to buy even the cheap tequila.”

“How’d it go?”

“Slow.  People haven’t been going out that much lately.  Too cold for them I guess.”

“Meet any new friends?” (tried to link to explain this reference, page is gone apparently)

“Ha, ha, ha,” he deadpanned.  “You’re funny.  I’ll bet people would pay to see you.”

“Well, you never know.”

“I learned my lesson.  Anyway, things will soon be back to normal and I can stop working.  If you’re lucky you’ll see me on Fridays.  Maybe.”

I thought about it for a while.  “I’ll miss it.”

“Really?” he asked.

“Well, some of it, anyway,” I said.  “The parts where you threatened my life, not so much.”

“Yeah, me too, but I’ll be happy to have things normal again.” He finished his drink.  “Mind if I have another?” he asked.

“No, go ahead,” I answered.  “There’s plenty for both of us.”

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