What’s there to say? The guy choked on a pretzel. ‘t happens…

‘Course, Andrew Hofer’s prolly right: you never hear about people who eat their pretzels with a mouthful o’ hopsy suds choking on the crunchy, salty goldenbakes. Naw. Those folks are far too relaxed. The doughy pretzelchew just melts in the molars and slides easily down the gullet once the skids’ve been greased and numbed a bit…

Andrew also says we should start thinkin’ ’bout pretzel diameter regulations (and, one might add, we should take a look at those dangerous sodium levels while we’re at it). But I have an alternative theory of the incident: I think Bush actually fell asleep while eating his pretzel. D’yall catch that Miami/Baltimore game? It was like watching a can of paint watching paint dry. I mean, it was meta-boring…!

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