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Joementum and the Road to Damascus

Joe Lieberman, epitomizing the anti-masculine qualities of an arch conservative in today’s WSJ Opinion Journal:

[…]Now the Damascus airport is the point of entry into Iraq for most of the suicide bombers who are killing innocent Iraqi citizens and American soldiers, and trying to break America’s will in this war. It is therefore time to demand that the Syrian regime stop playing travel agent for al Qaeda in Iraq.

When Congress reconvenes next month, we should set aside whatever differences divide us on Iraq and send a clear and unambiguous message to the Syrian regime, as we did last month to the Iranian regime, that the transit of al Qaeda suicide bombers through Syria on their way to Iraq is completely unacceptable, and it must stop.

We in the U.S. government should also begin developing a range of options to consider taking against Damascus International, unless the Syrian government takes appropriate action, and soon.:

My. Such bluster.

Note the hypermasculinist tropes of the pseudo-male trying desperately to compensate for having his schwantz ritualistically foreshortened: calls for “clear and unambiguous” messages where braver, more self-assured calls for nuanced proddings would have been just lovely. The classification of Assad’s Syria as a “regime” — with all the ugly connotations such a word carries with it (see, for instance, how the Bush regime comports itself), when “rule” or even “reign” are far more noble-sounding, and so respectful. Demands made in places where requests would almost surely show the kind of bedrock leadership abilities intrinsic to an actual man — one who is comfortable in his own man skin, performing manly tasks in a manly way that strives to appear distinctly non-manly.

Whereas Lieberman’s caveman act? It is to blush.

Were Ned Lamont in Congress, you can bet your penny loafers such ostentatious pseudo-masculinity would be eschewed in favor of the kind of genuine masculinity one finds in all the finest salons of Georgetown. Perfectly at home with his inner defeatist, Lamont, whose manhood is beyond question, wouldn’t waste time tossing out empty fighting words. Instead, he’d deftly change to topic from Syria to that of, say, antique cedar hope chests — and thus, with his quiet confidence and superior intuitions, once again make the world safe for Nancy Pelosi to don a head scarf and do some fig shopping while being guarded by the security forces of a terrorist-supporting King.

Which, you have to admit, is so chivalrous that it’s almost worthy of knighthood..

(h/t Terry Hastings)

11 Replies to “Joementum and the Road to Damascus”

  1. mRed says:

    Knighthood or Night Hood?

  2. mojo says:

    …such ostentatious pseudo-masculinity would be eschewed…

    Um… That’s not gay, is it?

    Just checking.

  3. Noah D says:

    [blockquote]send a clear and unambiguous message to the Syrian regime, as we did last month to the Iranian regime[/blockquote]

    We hit Iran last month? I must have missed that.

    [blockquote]the U.S. government should also begin developing a range of options to consider taking against Damascus International[/blockquote]

    Well, start with heavily cratering the runways…

  4. SeanH says:

    See, this is why I’m voting for Hillary. If we had a Clinton in the White House we could just blow the airport to hell and gone and everyone would be happy. That lousy Bush can’t even give someone the skunkeye without getting everyone all riled up about what a cowboy Nazi Chimptator he is.

    Also, nobody questions Hillary’s manhood.

  5. Old Texas Turkey says:

    It ain’t Hillary’s manhood thats under question. Its her carbon life form like similarities.

    TW: Broad Hurdle: nice.

  6. BJTexs says:

    That noise you hear is the sound of Kos and Hamsher grinding their teeth in perfect unison.

    Joementum harshes their mellow and deconstructs their circle jerk.

    Not bad for a faux weenie boy.

    tw: apples O’Donnell *sigh* It was St. Patricks Day, 1979….

  7. Stankleberry says:

    Hahahaha, awesome.

  8. alppuccino says:

    I heard Leiberman snapped a page’s neck betwixt his thumb and forefinger for slightly over-cooking his T-bone. “It defeats the whole purpose! Bring it ovah!!”

  9. BJTexs says:

    I’;ve heard that Lamont has said he would have flown to Damascus and handed out Mentos at the airport while playing Lennon peace songs.

    Apparently the hope was that the suicide bombers would be convulsed with laughter and then suffer massive myocardial infarctions.

    cunning

  10. happyfeet says:

    approximately 60 to 80 Islamist extremists, recruited every month from across the Middle East, North Africa and Europe

    Joe gets points knocked off on the dismount cause he doesn’t specifically mention Saudi Arabia.

  11. happyfeet says:

    Then again, he probably knows what he’s doing.

Comments are closed.