January 30, 2014

Breaking: “20-term California Democratic Rep. Henry Waxman to retire”

20 terms. 20. As in, around since the Ford Administration. I’d say that the founders would turn over in their graves if they ever thought a creature the likes of Waxman would become such a political institution — or that a free people would enable him to do so — but the fact of the matter is, they all turned over long ago, and at this point, they’re probably just thankful that Waxman’s nostrils, after a lot of soul-searching, have agreed to retire along with him.

Otherwise pens and watches and paper clips and all sort of knick knacks would go mysteriously missing as those two mini black holes continued to haunt the DC corridor. And the left would blame it on an imperfect Constitution that must be amended by progressive fiat.

We’re in a vortex of cyclical narrative sameness. And those nostrils, suited so perfectly for the DC trough, are in some way a metaphor for that stultifying stasis.

Posted by Jeff G. @ 11:40am
31 comments | Trackback

Comments (31)

  1. There is a woman running for that seat. She is a touchy feely, new agey crystal gazing chica from Beverley Hills.

  2. I could live with 20 terms for Representatives, provided we repeal the 17 Amendment and made senators answerable to the state legislatures which the founders intended. Pesky checks and balances.

  3. Ha! That’s great, McGehee.

  4. Normally i think it is unfair to criticize someone for their looks, I mean they are as Gaia made them but, man he is one ugly little bugger isn’t he.

  5. To answer @MangyLover: John McCain.

    To define mangy lover? Meghan McCain. Unless one prefers psycho hose beasts.

  6. I dream of the day when Democrats finally have dead people voting for dead people in office.

    We’re so close, Waxman! Don’t retire! If anyone should break the Madame Tussaud’s barrier, it’s the guy who already has the name for it!

  7. Good riddance…we need more congressional stories like this:
    http://americandigest.org/mt-archives/american_studies/davy_crockett_and_one_wee.php

    but I doubt there will be any…anytime soon.

  8. Capacious, even cavernous, nostrils.

  9. I always thought he just had a mud-dauber nest on his face.

  10. He just got tired of people peering up his nostrils and calling, “Pi-NOC-chio-o-o-o!”

  11. I can’t wait to miss you, Nostrildamus. Even if it gets a whole lot worse.

  12. Worse couldn’t include Sandy spending a miserable career in a House controlled by a party other than her own, however, and concomitantly, Hollywood ruing its asinine choice thereto.

  13. No go on that, Pablo. She’s a carpetbagger and not connected to the power structure in local politics.

    The clock has run out on her 15 minutes of fame.

  14. I always wondered whisky tango foxtrot was the deal with that nose. The guy looks like an extra from the Mos Eisley cantina. (Speaking of wretched hives of scum and villainy…)

  15. He looks like Nostradamus in the original silent film.

    I wonder if the doctor screamed and dropped him when he was delivering him?

  16. –feratu, I think you mean.

  17. Hugo Z, I think you mean,!

  18. Nosferatu? Yes, that sounds right. Thanks, sdferr.

  19. Rush used to call him Nostrildamus.

  20. The rats do seem to be deserting the sinking ship, don’t they?

    As others have stated, this is probably a reflection that Democrats are resigned that they cannot take back the House, and must focus on keeping the Senate in 2014.

    But that prompts the question: Don’t they care about representing their constituents?

    The answer, of course: No. After holding the majority reins of power, people like Waxman can’t be bothered to labor in obscurity. Only the brass ring will suffice.

  21. From Beverly Hills, note Ye.

    Apparently, the Beautiful People like ugly Representatives. Which says something. Not sure what.

    Guy sure took a beating from the Ugly Stick, though. If my dog had a face like that…

  22. Two new posts over at http://www.velociworld.com/

    Worth the wait, as usual, even if they’re as depressing as hell.

  23. She is a touchy feely, new agey crystal gazing chica from Beverley Hills.

    Ad amnesty and a powder dusting of stupid, and you’ve got Mitch McConnel’s GOP.

    Fun reading all you guys.

    Alas, no room for you classical liberal types in the Republican “big tent”.

    Sorry.

    Birds gotta swim & Karl Rove hasta eat.

  24. ..man he is one ugly little bugger isn’t he.

    Guy sure took a beating from the Ugly Stick, though.

    Eye Bleach hardest hit.

  25. Lamont! Come back!

  26. Alas, no room for you classical liberal types in the Republican “big tent”.

    That’s irony at it’s finest.

    The GOP, as currently controlled by McCain-ish leadership, isn’t even trying to stop this Republic’s slide Leftwards anymore. Incrementally ratcheting to doom we are; to disastrous end we collectively boil. ‘Progressives’, like frogs in increasing heated water, have no clue as to what keeps our fragile system running, and themselves alive, and will happily heat themselves to death. ‘Our’ GOP lacks the stamina and balls to effectively thwart them anymore, if they ever intended to do so in the first place.

    The TEAParty was our last best hope. So. We’ll just watch, and wait, and see. And boil right along with the rest.

  27. Waxman’s farewell speech:

    Oh freddled gruntbuggly,
    Thy micturitions are to me,
    As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee,
    That mordiously hath bitled out its earted jurtles,
    Into a rancid festering confectious inner-sphincter!

    Groop, I implore thee, my foonting turlingdromes,
    And hooptiously drangle me with crinkly bindlewurdles,
    Or else I shall rend thee in the gobberwarts with my blurglecruncheon,
    See if I don’t!

  28. If only someone had warned us about the importance of language in the political process — from the critics of the sophists onward to Orwell. Or even, someone in the new media, say, on a blog, would have explored and explicated and implored his fellow partisans to at least consider the real structural problems inherent in the way language was being used that would lead — inevitably, inexorably, predictably — to the progressivism /authoritarianism and anti-individualism / identity politics it was designed to foster.

    But then, HONOR, SIR! CLOWN NOSES! And so sadly, it’s a no go.

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