Given: when a New York Governor says, in a fairly straightforward and exceedingly difficult to misinterpret manner, that those citizens of his state who don’t believe in abortion on demand, gay marriage as an institution, or a ruler’s diktat to change the Second Amendment without going through the Constitutional process, have no business being New Yorkers, and aren’t, in effect, actual New Yorkers, that Governor — himself part of a New York aristocracy — is decreeing that his kingdom has certain standards, and citizens who refuse to adhere to those standards fall into a second class category, worthy of either excommunication or a willing egress from the pure Utopian goodness that the Governor demands be upheld. That is, he wishes to purge New York of the human garbage that keeps blocking the Heaven on earth that comes from same sex marriage, weapons that are altered cosmetically to look like muskets, and the ability to avoid the punishment of giving birth to the child you find in your womb after having gotten drunk on Appletinis and then gone home and gotten banged by some low-level financial planner who convinced you he was a high-level stock broker.
Resolved: conservatives, classical liberals, Reagan Democrats, and some libertarians should flee New York and wait for it to devolve back into the late 60s-70s crime-ridden, trash-encrusted, eyesore of a socialist hellhole it once again aspires to become. Because frankly, I miss the gritty crime movies — the French Connection, Death Wish, The Seven-Ups, half of all blaxploitation flicks, bits of the Exorcist, etc., — that captured the decrepitude of New York in that era. And I’m looking to be pleased.
I understand that New Yorkers are proud. But that just means that when their scion of a Governor lets it be known that nearly half of all prideful New Yorkers aren’t authentic New Yorkers and don’t stand for what New York stands for, those New Yorkers should call his bluff and take their tax monies and productivity elsewhere. Let New York become the wannabe cosmopolitan Potemkin city it so longs to be, even as its faddish flirtation with the Detroit Diet turns it into one giant episode of Hardcore Pawn.
And then when both coastal outposts of liberalism go broke and become crime ridden, we can send in Snake Plissken to clean shit up, and maybe as a result have access to some affordable beach property — because the first rule of our new cleansing would be that Hollywood and Broadway be relocated to 8 Mile and East LA.
update: related (h/t Darleen)
But, but, but… It’d be a more authentic and vibrant city.
. . . half of all blaxploitation flicks . . .
I had to pop over to YouTube and revel in nostalgia that is Super Fly. Thank you, Curtis Mayfield.
If we offer it back to the Dutch, do you think they’d take it?
Kinda seems like the odd republican who wins control of these blue bastions and brings them back from the brink isn’t really doing us much of a favor. New Yorkers (and blue staters in general) love to tout NYC, as a model of their worldview, but most of them seem to have short memories of what it was like when they had decades of full control.
And let’s not forget C.H.U.D.
I mean, literally take it, as in hooking it up to a fleet of tugboats and hauling it away, to use it to shore up their dykes and levees?
It certainly wasn’t very tolerant of Cuomo to push for a less diverse New York population, eh?
Is it just me or does Cuomo sound like a tweenage girl describing who’s getting invited to her birthday party?
As a New York State resident and in the spirit of the Hyannisport conclave, I am personally opposed to Andrew Cuomo having a cameo as a victim in a real life version of a Charles Bronson vigilante movie.
On the policy level however, I must be tolerant and accepting of the inclusion of life imitating art in People’s Republic of New York State.
HOMOPHOBE!
What, no ANTI-SEMITE for the levees?
Escape From New York?
Don’t call me “Snake”…
— Donald Plissken
One needs only listen to Evil Eyes Andy speak to realize that bastard don’t know jack shit about what it means to be from Noo Yawk City, nevermind anywhere north of Yonkers.
Snake Plissken? I heard he was dead.
There’s still “gritty'”being made. I’ve been watching this French TV show, “Braquo” and it is gritty.
Speaking of excommunication: Andrew Cuomo claims to be a Catholic, even though he is living with a woman not his wife. He flagrantly supports and promotes abortion, which is a violation of Catholic doctrine. Why has Cardinal Dolan (or whoever Cuomo’s Bishop is) not excommunicated him?
Andy has said that faithful Catholics are not true New Yorkers. The bishops should return the favor and declare that he is not a true Catholic.
I’d even settle for Jack Burton if Snake Plissken isn’t available.
“Just remember what ol’ Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, and the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big ol’ storm right square in the eye and he says, “Give me your best shot, pal. I can take it.”
Rick Perry should start making moves to transfer the NYSE to Texas. Build infrastructure, including IT stuff…
You just know that de Blasio is gonna need to balance his socialist agenda on the backs of NYC’s wealthy. We can already see his disdain for them in the “inequality” of street plowing.
When the pain gets too severe, have Wall Street bail.
Without their dollars, NYC will collapse into the socialist paradise it deserves.
The only thing that might stop this is if the financial elite love the NYC culture (Broadway, etc.). They might not want to move, but if it makes too much financial sense for their employers what choice will they have?
>>joelwickham says January 22, 2014 at 11:10 am
Speaking of excommunication: Andrew Cuomo claims to be a Catholic, even though he is living with a woman not his wife. He flagrantly supports and promotes abortion, which is a violation of Catholic doctrine. Why has Cardinal Dolan (or whoever Cuomo’s Bishop is) not excommunicated him?<<
He married and divorced a Kennedy; thus, he has received "the Boston Diocese Dispensation." Timmy Dolan doesn't have the balls to issue an over-riding ecumenical decision.
But, but, but… It’d be a more authentic and vibrant city.
Detroit is pretty authentic.
Feral.
Whatever.
Beck is pretty sure that Cuomo is trying to out-Progg de Blasio, because no punk NYC mayor is going to be king of THAT hill.
Even so, message received. Hannity has had it, and Beck is demanding that Cuomo tell him whether he wants Beck’s tax money or not, given that part of his company plus 200 employees are still there.
frankly, I miss the gritty crime movies
Serpico.
I also support efforts by the rest of NY state to carve the NYCancer out of their body. That will leave Ithaca mighty confused, but it’s only half-progg anyway, so confused it will remain.
If Cuomo were LDS and he were shacking up so publicly, he’d be excommunicated in a New York minute.
Pun intended.
One might be permitted the conjecture that were Cuomo LDS, he could not be elected Governor to his own New York State.
Or even Catholic.
That’s an incredibly stupid idea. It’s the pseudo-morality of the financial elite that makes New York the cesspool of Fail that it is. Why in hell would Texas want to do that to itself?
I’m bettin Les Gold wouldn’t be all that welcome in NYC either…
“Why in hell would Texas want to do that to itself?”
They can’t come where anyway until people forget about Enron. We’re too corrupt here in Texas to host a stock market. Or at least DAFW is. And hOuston blows up every other months so that’s no good. And Waco is boring.
If *I* were gonna move the NYSE, I’d move it to Hawaii. Duh.
I’ve move it to Meteor (Berenger) Crater in Arizona. It would save some time having a big pit all ready to go.
Maybe they can set the next Resident Evil game there, though I doubt people’d notice the zombies much.
“Kinda seems like the odd republican who wins control of these blue bastions and brings them back from the brink isn’t really doing us much of a favor.”
Not sure about that. We’ve had 20 years of relatively (for NYC) good governance. People start taking things for granted. A new generation of idiots, many recent arrivals, elects their “conscience.” Things deteriorate and for some who are able learn, there is a lesson. I am one person who learned this lesson.
As far as people voting their conscience, it’s from my experience of the well-off leftists who predominate here, more voting their guilty conscience. They don’t feel entitled to their wealth, much of it inherited or married into. The people actually making their money tend to evolve politically. The people inheriting it and marrying into are the ones who will never change their affiliation. It’s a lifelong penance for them. And Cuomo is one of them.
Thanks for the counterpoint. I hope there are plenty more voters with their eyes open, and willing to accept some harsh reality.
I’d be happy to be wrong in this case.
Not as much as I’d like you to be, coming from here, raising a family here and emotionally invested in the place as I am. Cuomo, among his despicable attributes, is a finger in the wind kind of guy. He was once a DLC guy in the Clinton admin. He’s also been pretty shrewd at playing the people’s emotions. He’s got a real pinko mayor to contend with on his left flank, one whose legislative goals may come to a stop in Albany, as they conflict with some of Cuomo’s initiatives. Cuomo is probably shoring up his left flank for the coming battle with deBlasio, the words part of which is already underway with their competing approaches to funding deBlasio’s promised universal nursery school. Will be entertaining, and of course dispiriting, to watch this play out.