December 7, 2013

“…let’s ticket his parents for parking their unicorn in a fire zone.” [Darleen Click]

As outrageous as this is, I no longer believe it is just stupidity.

The incident took place the week of October 14th, when fifth grader Johnny Jones asked his teacher for a pencil during class. Jones walked to the front of the classroom to retrieve the pencil, and during his walk back to his seat, a classmate and friend of Johnny’s held his folder like an imaginary gun and “shot” at Johnny. Johnny playfully used his hands to draw the bowstrings on a completely imaginary “bow” and “shot” an arrow back. Seeing this, another girl in the class reported to the teacher that the boys were shooting at each other. The teacher took both Johnny and the other boy into the hall and lectured them about disruption. The teacher then contacted Johnny’s mother, Beverly Jones, alerting her to the “seriousness” of the violation because the children were using “firearms” in their horseplay, and informing her that the matter had been referred to the Principal. Principal John Horton contacted Ms. Jones soon thereafter in order to inform her that Johnny’s behavior was a serious offense that could result in expulsion under the school’s weapons policy. Horton characterized Johnny’s transgression as “making a threat” to another student using a “replica or representation of a firearm” through the use of an imaginary bow and arrow.

This is about aggressively stomping out typical and normal boy behavior. Or any independent, imaginative behavior that doesn’t conform to the “we all belong to government” hive-mind.

Do you think for one moment that the little girl didn’t get the message that she is rewarded for tattling to The Authority?


h/t William Jacobson

Posted by Darleen @ 3:11pm
82 comments | Trackback

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Comments (82)

  1. that Megan Kelly hooch (pictured above) gets the state where this happened wrong

    she says Georgia

    but it looks like this actually happened in “Fawn Grove, Pennsylvania”

  2. and the fascist piece of shit principal’s name is actually Jon Horton

  3. curiously, the bitch teacher goes unnamed

    which makes it really hard for people to shield their kids from this child-abusing whore

  4. the kids should try imaginary bazookas next

  5. the parents here had plenty of warning though that they were endangering their kids by entrusting them to a school run by child-abusing whore fascists

    the fucking school motto is “Providing Progressive Education to Strengthen the Global Community”

    kinda hard to feel too sorry for Johnny’s dumbass parents here

  6. poor johnny he is being taught by the proggtarded

  7. So from pop tarts bitten into a pistol shape to invisible imaginary hand grenades to invisible bows and arrows. Soon frowning will be punishable, then not smiling widely enough.

  8. Fernando Rodney has been killing random baseball fans after his every save, for years now. But then, he’s a Dominican, so probably the moral cognoscenti cut him a bit of the ol’ barbarian’s slack, in keeping with their desire to maintain a healthy internationalists’ bona fides.

  9. Next time the kids should pantomime inserting keys into their desktop surfaces and turning them in unison.

    “Would you like to play a game?”

  10. or a baracky drone strike?

  11. Those kids need to instigate the whole class into reenacting a classic Mexican stand-off.

    Except for that tattle tail big mouthed girl. She could use a little constructive bullying.

  12. Somewhat related. How to angle for a promotion in with the present CIC.

  13. >The only guns permitted will be the following:<

    the asshole will be shot by the guns not "permitted"

  14. “You can’t shoot me! It’s not permitted!”

  15. the asshole or proggtard cum licker

    ” When you die your weapons must be turned into the local police department, which will then destroy them.”

    eff you and your baracky

  16. What is happening inside our country is random and disgusting, and living here in England I am at a complete loss as to how to explain this at all. In 2011 the number of gun deaths in the United States was 10.3 per 100,000 citizens. In 2010 that statistic in the UK was 0.25

    OK, I’m calling bullshit.

    According to this, the entire homicide rate (not just by guns, but all intentional homicide) for the US is 4.7 per 100k. It’s 6.9 for the world, 3.5 for Europe, and 1.2 for the UK.

    Oh, wait, here it is. the jack-ass included suicides and accidents.

    Gee, I wonder how suicide rats in general compare?

    Here we go. pretty close.

    Seems the Brits, having no firearm handy, hang themselves instead.

  17. Some interesting facts:

    1. The number of physicians in the United States is approximately 700,000.
    2. Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year is appx. 120,000.
    3. Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171. (US Dept. of Health & Human Services)
    4. The number of gun owners in the US is 80,000,000.
    5. The number of accidental gun deaths per year (all age groups) is 1,500.
    6. The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .0000188.

    Ergo, doctors are statistically about 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.

    Let’s try out automobiles vs guns next, shall we?

    Automobiles kill roughly 93 people every day (just over 34k last year) purely by accident, while there were just over 32k gun-related deaths in the same time period. Ergo, more people die in auto accidents than because someone used a gun. (Isn’t something that kills more people by accident than something else does by specific design considered more dangerous?)

    I love statistics.

  18. i love grapefruit marmalade

  19. Solution. Give the kid an invisible imaginary citation which he will pay with an invisible imaginary cash and pay every teacher and admin involved an invisible imaginary salary from now on and give them invisible imaginary kids to teach in some invisible and imaginary school.

  20. I’m not seeing it

  21. what i AM seeing howevers is that Jamie Lynn sounds like America, before it was all obamaraped and covered with oozing sores

  22. where’s bee moe anyways

    I’m a see if I can text him or whatever

    it’s really sad you ones drove him off

    plus Mr. froman too

    Mr. Abe Froman to you

    thank god for that colorado guy what can do the commentings about the Things wot He Made Then Ate

    the rest of y’all are just background noise, mostly

    bless your hearts and all

    it’s just you’re always back in the tard bus where people are all

    a. cheering the latest pro-Christmas Palin proclamation (“Christmas is super I don’t care even if you’re one of them atheist folks it’s like… GINGERBREASD HOUISES PLUS JSUS REASON 4 SEASON)

    b. super-mad how karl rove is being all super-establishmenty… Agin

    c. Carrie Underwood is like the hottest effing nun like ever… I got my ticket for the long way round

  23. Seems the Brits, having no firearm handy, hang themselves instead.

    In the same position, I’d certainly give it some thought.

  24. What is that buzzing? You guys hear that? Sounds like maybe one of those stupid proggie light bulbs gone bad.

  25. “it’s just you’re always back in the tard bus where people are all ”

    He said, between mindless babbling about various species of whores and tiresome foodie anecdotes. But no one gave one single damn about his 2008 Frum-esque advice because they all knew how worthless, insipid, and shallow it was due to the long history of McCainesque Boehner ian type people (who are actually stupid enough to value and follow it) losing. Why, they lose almost as often as they smugly speculate about what’s popular and what needs to be done. Oh well. Losers love to strike a pose.

  26. “i love grapefruit marmalade”

    That would be cute, if it were cute. Oh well.

  27. if you mix red and blue it makes purple

    true story

  28. Britain has a rather unique way of counting some death as an “intentional homicide” a murder. It is only counted if the perpetrator is convicted of the crime and also the crime only appears in the statistics as happening in the year of the conviction not the year it occurred.

    They also play games with the other crime statistics by encouraging the police to downgrade a crime to a lower crime for reporting purposes in order to de-emphasize the actual crime rates.

  29. you can do this experiment home all you need is a blender ok get out your blender

    add a small bag of frozen hayberries

    ok now add a small bag of frozened blueberries….


    it’s science!

  30. “if you mix red and blue it makes purple”

    If you mix stupid and smart it makes stupid though.

  31. you gave to be more proactive than that

  32. *have* to be I mean

    did you know if you have two neato vacuums going at once they get confuzzled and steal each other’s charging stations

    either that or they do it on purpose, which is kind of disconcerting

  33. Also crackers.

  34. Pingback: Sorta Blogless Sunday Pinup » Pirate's Cove

  35. Ergo, doctors are statistically about 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners.

    And that’s why Obama is pursuing a backdoor ban on doctors.

  36. it’s really sad you ones drove him off

    This, from the Karl Rove of driveaways.

  37. Progressives like those at this school live in their own subculture; a cult, really. I don’t think they get together to plan the conspiracy, it just happens from the din of their echo chambers.
    The root of all that is the ethnic, gender, class-studies that go on at the university. That is the lens through which they view everything.

  38. Greetings:

    If you don’t much mind, would you please explain to me why you think little girls would need a “message” to tattle to authority. I beg to differ. It very much seems to me that it is totally instinctual. Especially in my Big Sister’s case.

  39. Who knew?

    While Microsoft’s recent move to encrypt user data made the most headlines, the reasoning underlying its new data protection strategies classify the US government in the same category as a cyber-criminal group.

    Brad Smith, Microsoft’s EVP of Legal and Corporate Affairs, labeled the American government as an “advanced persistent threat” in a December 4 post on The Official Microsoft Blog.

    The term advanced persistent threat (APT) refers to an attacker, usually an organized group of malicious attackers, that should be considered harmful and dangerous — and an overall method of attack that plays a “long game.”

  40. you ones drove him off

    I hear a dog whistle.

    You can’t be serious, happy. You are the only one on this blog to receive repeated warnings from the host to stow your bullshit or leave.

    I’ll mark this one up to drunk posting.

  41. Has anyone heard from Brad Smith, Microsoft’s EVP of Legal and Corporate Affairs, lately?

  42. I’ll mark this one up to drunk posting.

    Then why does he act this way when he is sober? (Or is he ever? It would explain, although not justify, much.)

  43. If you don’t much mind, would you please explain to me why you think little girls would need a “message” to tattle to authority.

    It isn’t a message that they need to tattle, per se, but that they will automatically be believed and approved of for doing so.

    Unless they are wearing glasses. In the movies, little girls who wear glasses are always liars. Or worse. (Little boys wearing glasses are implicitly Know-It-Alls.)

  44. Hey! I wore glasses when I was a little girl.


  45. Has anyone heard from Brad Smith, Microsoft’s EVP of Legal and Corporate Affairs, lately?


  46. I’ve been wearing glasses since kindergarten. It’s not my fault that I actually DID know it all.

  47. I know I certainly thought I did.

  48. Drumwaster, Leigh: There’s a reason my beloved bride calls me ‘Smarty Pants Big Head’.

  49. Bob, that’s sweet and a lot nicer than what some wives call their husbands.

  50. I didn’t say that’s all she calls me…

  51. Everyone will have coverage, but no doctor or hospital will take it.


  52. I thought Tiddy Bear was a joke and that turned out to be real.

  53. New Affordable Care US health plans will exclude top hospitals

    I’m sure Barak I will fix that for us

    if we appealled to his mercifulness

  54. Who here who watch the Mentalist was surprised when the woman he met on the beach on some South American island turned out to be an FBI agent?

    I would have been much more surprised if she hadn’t.

  55. Ernst: I prefer to call him ‘Barack The Unready’, after Æthelred of unblessed memory.

  56. Calumny! Æthelred loved England.

  57. I would love to see a Thunderdome matchup between happyfeets and that Megan Kelly hooch; one that begins with him referring to her that way to her face.

    I think she’d fuck him up bigtime.

  58. I think she’d fuck him up bigtime.

    And with a million watt smile on her face.

  59. I’ve seen her get the Eyes of Death when she goes in for the kill in an interview. She and Janine Pirro are not to be messed with.

  60. i do not have time for thunderdomes with propaganda sluts until after the holidays

  61. You’re supposed to only saystuff like that in the event that such an encounter became possible.

  62. oh.

    you know it’s not like there’s some kind of manual

  63. It’s in the by-laws of the Fight Club.

    Now that I’ve broken the first rule, I have to go to the store.

  64. Putin dissolves state news agency, tightens grip on Russia media:

    President Vladimir Putin tightened his control over Russia’s media on Monday by dissolving the main state news agency and replacing it with an organization that is to promote Moscow’s image abroad.

    (Insert your own joke about MSNBC here…)

  65. MSNBC’s mama is so fat

  66. McGehee: Calumny! Æthelred loved England.

    How about, then, Eystein The Fart of the House of Yngling?

  67. Putin, “The reports of the death of Communism are greatly exaggerated.”

  68. I’m-a go create a bunch of Wikipedia articles about made-up ancient Vikings too, and it’ll be cooler than the one you made up.




  69. how fat is msnbc’s mama?

  70. From Íslendingabók [The Book of Icelanders] by Ari Thorgilsson…


    I first composed Íslendingabók for our bishops Þorlákr and Ketill, and I presented it both to them and to Sæmundr the priest. And when it pleased them to have it thus or to add something, I wrote it in the same fashion, without genealogies and biographies of kings, and added what become known to me later and which now is more fully declared in this one than that one. But whatever is incorrect in this scholarship, one should consider better what is proven to be truer.

    Hálfdan hvítbeinn [white-leg], king of the people of Uppland [Upplendingar], son of Óláfr trételgja [tree-feller] king of the Svíar, was the father of Eysteinn fretr [fart], father of Hálfdan inn milda [the gentle] and inn matarilli [the food-stingy], father of Goðröðr veiðikonungr [hunting-king], father of Hálfdan inn svarti [the Black], father of Haraldr inn hárfagri [the handsome-hair], who was the first of this dynasty to become the sole king over all of Norway.

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