1. Breakfast
2. Small talk
3. Vote for a comprehensive immigration bill they haven’t read, fucking over not only their base, but all those among the American citizenry who don’t profit directly from cheap labor, depressed salaries, a permanent fund-raising tool calling for effective border control, the potential resurgence of unions (and the union dues that come with them, which are then laundered through the Democrat Party in return for votes and favorable pro-union labor rulings), or the growth in popularity of Mexican soap operas.
4. Congratulate each other.
5. Tout “bi-partisan” compromise that will fix the border issues while humanely allowing noble law breakers to emerge from the shadows, demand welfare and health care, have the provisional status put in place to prevent that struck down by the courts, who will side with the “no-second class citizens!” refrain already being prepped.
6. Make the numbers such that they apply pressure to the House to pass something that, while at first blush more strict, will have its teeth removed in conference — all part of the ruling class/corporatist/big labor fan dance.
7. Snack
8. Mill about.
9. Adjourn
10. Dismiss critics (and constituents) as “anti-immigration” extremists unhelpful to the new GOP brand.
11. Grab a happy hour single malt and maybe grope a Georgetown waitress.
12. Sleep like babies, dreaming about all the “revenue” that will be generated by the President’s coming climate change initiatives, which they’ll pretend to find troubling until a last moment amendment convinces them that now they can vote to save the planet — and help the new GOP brand.
13. Get up to pee several times.
14. Begin afresh tomorrow!
I’ll bet Mexicans on the border are pounding starting blocks into the ground in anticipation of this bill being passed.
Mr. Rubio goes to Washington is playing out more like a Lucas-Anakin Skywalker power and corruption tragedy than a heart warming Frank Capra classic on American virtues…
Blake says June 24, 2013 at 11:29 am
I’ll bet Mexicans on the border are pounding starting blocks into the ground in anticipation of this bill being passed.
– See more at: https://proteinwisdom.com/?p=49784#comment-997696
Sir! Is that a Speedy Gonzales reference? The racism of the conservative wing of the GOP knows no bounds!
Sorry Blake, I was momentarily possessed by Keith Olbermann…or Lindsay Graham. It is hard to keep it straight.
No “morning constitutional?”
Maybe that’s their problem.
sure they don’t have time for a Sarah Palin retarded bay joke?
The seduction of wanting to get “immigration reform” behind them must be pretty powerful to these people. What I want to know is, what do they think they are going to accomplish after it is?
“baby”
Call all of those businessmen for immigration reform and ask for some big campaign dough in exchange for their “brave stance” of immigration reform.
I believe there’s room for, “Thank you sir, may I please have another,” three or four times in that list. Whether it is breakfast, snacks, the single malt, or the missing step for flagellation by the DNC.
[…] Goldstein has somehow gotten a hold of the fourteen point agenda for the Senate Republicans that they are, as your read this, […]
Is that a homophobic dog whistle???
Nicely done.
“In America, you have the Evil Party and the Stupid Party. Occasionally, they get together to pass something truly stupid AND evil. This is called ‘bipartisanship’.”
“C’mon, baby, spend the night with me…“
I am stealing that, Mojo…brilliant.
As a bitter-clinger, my natural inclination is toward dog whistles. Or, so I’ve been told.
Too late, I already stole it. Busy filing off the serial numbers.
Blake, I could care what civilian cock Lindsay Graham likes sucking. It is his confusion (or should I say lies) about political orientation I find troublesome. I also find it distasteful when he is going to town on Schumer. At least get a room.
Excuse me, that comment above is to McGehee!