September 28, 2012

You know, it’s Friday, and it’s been a very tough week for you and us both, emotionally speaking, so if ever there was a time for a little, you know, dancing

Hells no. In fact, he’s really in my doghouse right now (literally; I’ve got the opening shored up with an ironing board and some gorilla glue). And that’s because yesterday the little panzer rat nearly got me into deep shit with the feds by getting himself sloppy drunk on Jack and Gingers, then tried to hire an FBI agent posing as a computer hacker to break in and steal John Travolta’s downloaded gay porn collection. All part of some elaborate blackmail scheme that was supposed to end in a Grease 3, from what I could gather through the drunken babble.

Luckily for me, the cybercrimes guy had a sense of humor. And, strangely enough, his very own armadillo!

Go figure.

Posted by Jeff G. @ 5:28pm

Comments (59)

  1. next on pwtv “dancing with the armadillos”

  2. So what is it about an orange jumpsuit that keeps him from dancing?

  3. I just put in an order for some of your son’s popcorn, so hopefully that will make this week a bit easier for you and the armadillo.

  4. Obama put out a cloying note to “Mom” begging her for an $18,000 loan to cover her birth control costs.

    We shall go on to the end, we shall mock them fight in France, we shall mock them fight on the seas and oceans, we shall mock them fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the air, we shall defend our Island, whatever the cost may be, we shall mock them fight on the beaches, we shall mock them fight on the landing grounds, we shall mock them fight in the fields and in the streets, we shall mock them fight in the hills; we shall never surrender

  5. This one is actually pretty believable. I could see the dillo doing this.

    He has no shame at all.

  6. He has no shame at all.

    – He does, however, have an ego the size of Vermont.

  7. But wait, there’s more! Our researchers have compiled the following list of features that distinguish the free ObamaPhone from a regular cell phone:

    It automatically rejects calls from people with a different opinion.
    Every time you take a picture, it produces a grimmer image of America.
    It doesn’t have a plan; it just keeps telling you how bad the other guy’s plan is.
    When it crashes, it blames your previous phone.
    All 3 AM calls go directly to voicemail.
    It has a really useless app called “Biden.”
    Pairing it with another device sucks all the energy out of the other unit.
    Type in “job search” and it gives you directions to the welfare office.


  8. Sumpin’ new everyday in America’s pasttime.

  9. note practice “catch the glove”

  10. some den beste classics

    Well, not exactly. The situation isn’t precisely symmetric. Their government and their culture and especially their religion had relied on tight control of information given to their people in order to indoctrinate them to get them to act in a way which is to the advantage of the leaders. Our system, on the other hand, is designed precisely so that it works best when our people are best informed and make decisions for themselves.

    And because of that, we as individuals have developed highly refined skills to detect when someone else is trying to fool us, often referred to as “bullshit detectors”. No-one’s perfect at this and anyone can be fooled, but most of us are pretty hard to fool and the kinds of attempts the Arabs have been making recently have impressed the majority of American readers mostly because of their sheer ineptitude.

    Simply put, we may read what they write, but that doesn’t mean we believe it. We’re used to hearing contradictory information from multiple sources and trying to ferret out the truth.

    In their society, the commoners only get their information from tightly controlled sources, and they believe what they’re told (or at least they pretend to) because if they don’t then they will disappear in the night some time.

    But as a result of that, their propagandists also are used to writing for people who are forced to believe, not for those who are used to rejecting crap. When you read things like the official North Korean news agency, it almost reads like a parody.

    In the long run, freedom will triumph. The more free that the people of a nation are, the more they can contribute to the economic and political power of their nation, and the more powerful that nation will be relative to others.


  11. Ahhhhh, these internets!

    A commenter a few several posts back mentioned a YouTube hit ‘Gangham Style’ (in the context that Jeff should fall asleep in a sauna on some bemused Zen warrior’s shoulder, in order to successfully promote intentionalism style, or something), a video I’d never heard of (being out of meme circulation, mostly).

    So, I felt left out.

    Grabbed the flv file off Youtube, rippled the mp3 from that then used Audacity to snag a 21 second clip. Sent that to the my smartphone, to a directory I created with Astro file manager. I now have a ‘Gangham Style’ ringtone no one else on the block will even recognize!

  12. – For your weekend reading list……

    “How to see Uranus with a telescope this weekend

  13. And, strangely enough, his very own armadillo!

    Next week: Two ‘dillos do Vegas!

  14. Luckily for me, the cybercrimes guy had a sense of humor. And, strangely enough, his very own armadillo!

    Oh bullshit. He probably slapped a Kotex on his pussy and called it an armadillo.

  15. “How to see Uranus with a telescope this weekend“

    According to some conspiracy theorists, the moon is an optical illusion created by mirrors strategically placed upon Uranus.

  16. Guess what? Althouse might vote for Obama again because Rush played a clip of that awful bellowing ‘ he gave me a phone’ woman once too often and she perceives that it has an ugly, manipulative, ‘racial fear’ dimension that somehow attaches to Romney or something.

  17. Ann Althouse is Meghan McCain with a JD.

  18. JD wouldn’t have her.

  19. Ha! No, I don’t suppose he would…

  20. – Handy viewing tip: Once you’ve located Uranus, point the telescope a little lower and slightly West and you should be able to see Encino.

  21. – First they lied in a combined duplicitous effort to intentionally rewrite history and mislead the public, and now they persist in lying about the lying, and of course who is crying foul? Why who else but that paragon of honesty and integrity, John “lost DDS-180” Kerry.

    – Un-fucking-believable. If one of the four Americans that were murdered was one of mine I’d litterily legally nuke the whole den of rats occupying the White House and the State department.

  22. Reading that Althouse thing about the “fear” of black people, I mean, who “fears” black people because of that phone clip? Who “fears” black folks, period? Or gays?

    Everything you hear these days is about fears and phobia and hate. I usually dismiss it as rhetoric, but I am starting to wonder if that isn’t what is motivating a great deal of the citizens of this country.

    Maybe they really are afraid of their own shadow and hate the things that scare them.

  23. Althouse typifies a new hyphenation: the Hormonal-American. If only we could bring a bunch of state legislators up to today from 1920 or slightly before, to see what these Hormonal-Americans have done to the country, maybe they’d return to their own time and just repeal Prohibition a decade early.

  24. Guess what? Althouse might vote for Obama again because Rush played a clip of that awful bellowing ‘ he gave me a phone’ woman once too often and she perceives that it has an ugly, manipulative, ‘racial fear’ dimension that somehow attaches to Romney or something.

    Can we all stop reading Althouse now? Can we get Glenn to give her up?

    And, please, when was the last time Althouse was IN a city? Women like the one Rush played, over and over, you SHOULD fear them- or the segment of society who they represent. She’s not there for the upwardly mobile, educated black. She was there shouting her membership as one of the failures of black society- the takers.

    Our cities, and it’s denizens, are going down like the mutherfocking bootleg fireworks. A cop came into our shop and said whole areas are basically lawless, and that people need to protect themselves. And Ann just wants to turn the other cheek and pretends it’s not happening, because it’s not happening in her line of sight.

    And it’s not a function of color. The cities just HAPPEN to be populated by folks that could look like Obama’s son. And they also just happen to be represented by race pimps who don’t care what happens to “their people” as long as they get their own filthy lucre as they pretend to fight the power.

    But, you know, I’d like Ann to head to Detroit, get our of her car on the East side – you know, near Kelly and Gratiot, and use her rational mind to get to know those folks. Don’t fear those folks, Ann. VOTE for Obama.

    Put your head back in the sand, Ann. Rush probably made that woman up.

  25. Reading that Althouse thing about the “fear” of black people, I mean, who “fears” black people because of that phone clip? Who “fears” black folks, period? Or gays?

    Sorry, but there *are* black folks you should fear. If you are in Detroit, and in a bad neighborhood, you should fear EVERYONE. Because the battle is over, and we’ve surrendered.

    Policing is racist. Prisons are racist. Crime is racist.

  26. But, of course, I don’t fear that woman.

    I wouldn’t trust her. But I don’t fear her- because she’s a woman. But she belongs to a segment of society that you should fear.

  27. Can we all stop reading Althouse now?

    Who read that goofy fence-sitter in the first place? With the exception of perhaps a dozen linked posts, I hardly knew her.

  28. I don’t read her, but puppyblender links her -just about-daily.

  29. Car, there was a piece on Drudge yesterday – some interview with a Chicago hood gang leader who said “theres no answer for the murder rate except just letting them kill each other off”. 911 does not respond anymore, and the cops are just not showing up to turf wars, school riots, etc..

  30. You go Rom Emanuel! How does it feel to be a sad pussy who can’t even begin to do what Rudy Giuliani did which was enforce the damned law equally? How come you won’t let a store sell chicken in your shit hole burning windswept concrete wasteland of a city but you can’t even stand up to violent gangs? I mean Nursey Bloomberg is a tyrant and an ass and everything but at least his city isn’t on goddamned fire. He had working toilets and unbroken windows in HIS city.

  31. Guys, you’re missing the fun. Althouse is actually whining about comments within this post from Carin, BMoe and McGehee:


  32. Sorry I Callahan,

    I should have checked to see if your link actually worked before I reposted it.

  33. “This is a classic theme in anti-Althousiana: jealousy that I have readers and, especially, that I get Instapundit links. (Hey, I’m a guestblogger on Instapundit right now. If I wanted, I could go over there myself and write a post lambasting Rush Limbaugh for playing and replaying that racial-fear-stimulating video over and over. But I’m keeping it here, in this cozier place, where I let commenters in. And there are 600+ shots at me in the “How Racist?” comments thread.)”

    She thinks that “anti-althousia” is a thing and it’s really about link jealousy. She doesn’t think that someone is reacting to something she said that is ridiculous or a broad preponderance of various ridiculous things that she’s said over the years that are ridiculous. Oh no! It’s just jealous people. What she said was totally fine and beyond the scope of anyvalid criticism if. Obviously if Car In weren’t so link jealous and if instapundit still linked him, he’d like agree n’ stuff. Right?


  34. I just followed your link, I Callahan. Althouse reaffirms my reasons to never read her disconnected flailings.

    And it’s got nothing to do with her being a female blonde lawyer of decadent privilege, in case she’s looking to point tentacles.

  35. Ha ha ha …

  36. guess I got under her skin.

  37. Obviously if Car In weren’t so link jealous and if instapundit still linked him, he’d like agree n’ stuff. Right?

    Yea. She’s totally got my number.

    Because that was really the thrust of my argument.

  38. – Progressives really really hate it when one of the natives get in front of a camera and show off the Lefts imposed reservation existance and mentality, and all its nakid social repercussions.

    – Conservatives are expected to simply accept the pejoratives the Left uses against them routinely in the interest of keeping the race card alive, and thus the political advantage. Sans that narrative, and the advantage among the minorities it affords, , the Democratic party would essentially cease to exist.

    – The fear in the room is the Lefts fear, if ever they let go of the tigers tail.

    – I don’t blame them. They should be afraid.

  39. Uh oh! Protein Wisdom just got linked at instapundit!

    And the chess game continues apace.

  40. I just wrote a reply over at Althouse’s place, but I couldn’t figure out how to assign my name to it. I signed in using my Google account, so the comment appears as Student X.

    Briefly, I think it’s rather despicable to ascribe to racism what should be ascribed to a particular mindset nurtured by a particular political ideology, whose cynical proponents then uses its panders to keep perpetual voter client groups secured.

    More, for someone who speaks a lot about free speech, Ann seems quite willing to use leftist tactics — the faux moral outrage of the PC warrior, in this case — to stop any meaningful discussion in its tracks. It’s as if we are somehow to blame because the race of the phone woman was what it was. It’s not about race. It’s about entitlement. We’re near the electoral tipping point, where 50.1 can vote themselves the stuff of the 49.9 — and the permanent ruling class doesn’t much care, because they can keep the divisions going to raise funds, all the time holding onto their power and their perks and living in their cloister of status quo sameness.

    Many of us here have speculated that, near election time, Althouse would find a way to rationalize voting for Obama again. Maybe this was a trial balloon, I can’t say for certain. But I do know this: anyone who votes for Obama this time around represents a threat to individual autonomy, a stable rule of law, and the separation of powers. And these are the very things that protect our liberties from a government class that is already making noises, at its academic fringes, about the overvalueing of free speech, and the hoary, Enlightenment construct of natural rights that needs be done away with to allow government to better “fix things.”

    Friends of mine will become, largely due to their ignorance, my enemies. And that will be a sad day for me, I can tell you that.

    Still, having said all that? In the end I doubt she pulls the lever for Obama.

  41. I notice once again that people who could care less what Plato has to say feel somehow compelled to parade their ignorance of what Plato has to say. It’s a weird modern phenomenon, as it happens, oddly related to the core of intentionality.

  42. I see the comments over there are running quite strongly against Althouse.

    Her rebuttal to Carin reminds my of those white liberals (and some squishy conservatives) I’ve spoken to who insist that illegal immigration and our lack of border security aren’t really a problem, and call me “racist” for thinking it is. Even after I tell them I’m of hispanic ancestry and am originally from a bordertown.

  43. Mike, check out Insty’s latest link in re the immigration racism nexus.

  44. That’s typical of the left on the immigration issue, sdferr. Just like the Elian Gonzalez case a dozen years ago.

  45. The ironic thing about Althouse is, by seeing racism where none exists, she only defines herself. Point your boney white finger at Rush all you want Ann, there’s three boney white fingers pointing back at yourself…

  46. Rush Limbaugh certainly catches a lot of hell nowadays, for doing what he’s been doing for some 26 years. If anything, he’s wiser and mellower now than when he first started his political punditry gig. What’s changed is that many people who criticize him aren’t solid in ideology; they are adrift in ‘losing more slowly’. These people constantly recalibrate their stances, to keep the favor of the correct cliques.

    When a cultural anchor sets itself in bedrock beliefs and values, be it Limbaugh or the TEA Party or Outlaw!, there’s those who imagine it as a wicked thing, becoming more ‘radical’ or ‘dangerous’, because they move farther and farther away from center themselves, unknowingly for the most part. I can tell Ms. Althouse has never been strongly anchored in a political belief system that’s staunchly Conservative. So, she drifts away.

    She can see Balloon Juice Reef from her front porch by now, I’ll warrant.

  47. Set anchor at Balloon Juice Reef! Progressives will only insult you behind your back then.

  48. FREE MUMIA!!!! Errrr, I mean the Armadillo!

  49. “Free Mumia? Hell, gimme two!

    “We’re sorry sir, only one to a customer.”

  50. “I see the comments over there are running quite strongly against Althouse.

    Yeah, by digging in with this nonsense she’s basically bending over in front of one of those hand-cranked wheels with four steel toed boots mounted on them that you occasionally see in cartoons.

  51. Heh, palaeomerus. And for some reason that brings this song to mind.

  52. What killed me about Althouse (I only read her when linked) was her sense of superiority over being “undecided” because she was keeping an “open mind” and hasn’t decided who she’ll vote for this time.

    Ya gotta be fucking kidding me.

    Then, she somehow rationalizes that what Rush says on his radio show is a factor in deciding whether to vote for Obama or not. Not WrightAyersCzarsNobudgitTrilliondollardeficitsFastandfuriousSolyndraMid-eastinflamesUnemploymentOutofcontrolimmigrationDomesticpreditordronesSCJKagenOutofcontrolregulationCoalplantsshuttingdownRisinggaspricesQE3 or any of the rest of it.

    No…whether Rush was playing on the emotions of racially sensitive people or not. THAT’s the kinda thing that gets her attention and is a part of her decision on whom to vote for.

    People take this woman seriously?

  53. Weird, my run on word was cut off.

    Oh well, I’m not going to try and recreate it. Just know, it was a significantly longer word…

  54. People take this woman seriously?

    mewings of a “stockholm syndrome” person

  55. a salvage:

    “Not WrightAyersCzarsNobudgitTrilliondollardeficitsFastandfuriousSolyndraMid-eastinflamesUnemploymentOutofcontrolimmigrationDomesticpreditordrones
    or any of the rest of it.”

  56. Ah, yes…thanks sdferr.

    Would have been a shame to miss QE3

    This is why the Federal Reserve through QE 3 and massive amounts of mortgage backed security purchases is essentially robbing from Peter to pay Paul. The end result is that you have shifted more of a burden to renters to essentially take off a bit of steam from home owners. Now you have major private equity investors buying properties and hiking rental prices since they are able to borrow money cheaply. In all reality you have shifted a larger burden on those least likely to have the means to afford it. This is why we have seen the middle class shrink in the last few decades and the ranks of the poor grow even larger. With over 46 million Americans on food stamps we really are becoming a split nation. And again, refer to the chart above on family spending. With the rise in the cost of food you are squeezing the lowest rung even further. Yet this is the setup of the current system. The Fed is picking winners at the expense of others. This is what occurs when you have manipulated money creation and coddling the banking sector versus actual real growth in the economy. When you see those headlines about inflation figures keep all this data in mind.