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“Michelle Obama ‘Guest Editor’ for Website Featuring Sex Tips–Including from Prostitutes”

I’m outraged!

No word yet from Karl Rove or Rich Lowry demanding she step down from her role as First Lady — nor, to my knowledge, has Hugh Hewitt commented on her dubious and decidedly improper adherence to her Christian faith.

Tic-tock tic-tock, fellas. Else, how will we know if our outrage is justified?

60 Replies to ““Michelle Obama ‘Guest Editor’ for Website Featuring Sex Tips–Including from Prostitutes””

  1. gr8r_good says:

    LOL!

  2. JHoward says:

    As a progg I’m pissed that FLOTUS has just rendered herself unfit by rendering herself unfit.

  3. Libby says:

    Well why shouldn’t she do this? She’s already been conferred “expert” status on other aspects of citizen’s physical well being – exercise and diet. This is just the next, ridiculous step resulting from taking her pseudo “health guru” role seriously up to this point.

  4. cranky-d says:

    I understand her arms are very toned.

  5. leigh says:

    Did she write that title? It sings like her the prose in her thesis.

  6. Ernst Schreiber says:

    Y’know, when I first saw this in the recent comments sidebar, I swear it said Michelle Malkin.

    You have no idea how disappointed I am, now that I know Jeff won’t be reinventing this site as a “game” blog.

  7. SmokeVanThorn says:

    Hewitt will try to justify his selective self righteousness by saying, in his wearily condescending way, “And don’t call in and say, ‘Hugh, you have a double standard.’ Of course I hold our side to a higher standard. We’re better than them.”

    Actually, “saying’ is the wrong term – he just plays the recording.

  8. JHoward says:

    Recently Hewitt championed Ryan by helpfully pointing out that everybody knew Ryan should be championed.

    Politics is easy.

  9. leigh says:

    Hewitt is kind of a dumbass, isn’t he?

  10. Except she isn’t elected, so she has nothing to step down from.

  11. Jeff G. says:

    Except she isn’t elected, so she has nothing to step down from.

    Oh. I forgot.

  12. Abe Froman says:

    I’m still waiting on someone to release her Body Mass Index so that we can all point and laugh at her for being obese. Not that she is in actuality, but I’d bet that the index says she is.

  13. cranky-d says:

    She is a big girl. NTTAWWT.

  14. Pablo says:

    This is just the next, ridiculous step resulting from taking her pseudo “health guru” role seriously up to this point.

    She wants to be Oprah. But I think she really wants to eat her first.

  15. leigh says:

    She hates Oprah. Thinks Oprah is a big fat slob and a lousy role model.

    Jealous much, M’chelle?

  16. EBL says:

    So long as you are not eating junk, reading junk is okay.

    Of course maybe there were some really good “sex tips” and with Barack away so much…sometimes you have to take matters into your own hands.

  17. EBL says:

    That is probably a visual you all could have done without.

  18. Libby says:

    BMI? Heck, I’d like to know her true dress size or her weight.

  19. Bob Belvedere says:

    Maybe Lady Michbeth took the gig so she could read the sex tips. I mean, after all, it’s not like she’s learning anything from Barry – ask Reggie Love and Kai Penn.

  20. leigh says:

    Heh.

  21. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    I don’t care if FLOTUS does porn. As long as she keeps her big nosy ass out of mine and everybody’s’ business. (talk about a visual you can do without).

    I’ve mostly just read the Akin stuff & the comments here the past few days. I get Jeff’s and a lot of others reasoning and opinion on it (let them control the narrative, etc). But Akin should have dropped out. And not for the “Lowry, Hewitt, Palin, Rove, Romney/ Ryan, RNC” reasons.

    But because he’s a functioning retard that belongs nowhere near the United States Code.

  22. Car in says:

    BMI? Heck, I’d like to know her true dress size or her weight

    She’s a perfect size 8. MISSES.

  23. Jeff G. says:

    But because he’s a functioning retard that belongs nowhere near the United States Code.

    But he’s a functioning retard who wouldn’t have voted to nationalize health care. Unlike the really bright Ivy Leaguers who either want to grow the government or manage the masses — and, in the case of our side, continue to believe that if they just show that they, too, are part of an educated elite, despite their political leanings, they’ll be accepted by the left who runs much of popular culture.

    Ignorance is bliss.

  24. McGehee says:

    BMI? Heck, I’d like to know her true dress size or her weight.

    That info is socked away under guard next to Barack’s college transcripts and the Fast & Furious documents.

  25. sdferr says:

    What a functioning retard’s CV looks like.

  26. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Lookit, I get it Jeff. And I know authors at AOSHQ are sometimes persona non grata around here, but Ace did hit on the thing (and if it came up here and I missed it, apologies) that was the whole “WTF?!” for me.

    Wasn’t about his abortion stance. Or even the “legitimate rape” thing. Between Whoopi’s “rape-rape” and Biden’s senility, sure. If he’d have stopped there. Come out with an apology, he’s sorry, and his tiny brain couldn’t organize a thought into coherent sentences. Ok, cool beans. Up to that point I think he was trying to say, “Don’t punish the infant for the rape. It’s not the child’s fault how it was conceived.” There’s adoption and whatnot.

    But he didn’t stop there. He went on about how a woman’s reproductive system “shuts down during that kind of thing.” A sitting US Congressman running for US Senate actually believes there is a tiny magical hockey goalie in every woman’s vagina (presumably hanging out around the cervix), that spends it’s time working out, staying limber, and drinking gatorade in case he’s needed.

    And then the day comes…BAM!…”legitimate rape.” The magical punani goalie laces up his skates, grabs his stick, puts on his mask, jumps into action, and proceeds, one by one, to whack that rape sperm back down range.

    That’s insane.

  27. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Ok sdferr.

    That’s obviously a joke, but still. The man “own goal’d” himself. He can add “un-forced, disastrous, stupefying comment” to his cv.

  28. McGehee says:

    A lot of people are assuming without evidence that Akin’s comments are hurting the chances of McCaskill being fired and Romney winning Missouri. To the extent the uproar does end up leading to that, I’m not sure the own-goal is his.

    And yes, even Rush Limbaugh can be wrong.

  29. sdferr says:

    Oh, certainly Lybd, no question he owns the initial stupidity. Personally I’d restrict that to using legitimate where legitimate doesn’t belong, with the rest of it merely unworthy of detailed public fuss. The whole picture, though, belongs to many other helpers, coming from everywhichaway. Like I asked, Who defaced the Hermae?

  30. McGehee says:

    Of course, maybe I’m just calmer about it all because I still haven’t bought into the “Oh lawd oh lawd Romney goan save us all!” hype.

  31. leigh says:

    Isn’t Rush on his fourth marriage now? Obviously the other three were the wrong girls.

  32. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    McGehee & sdferr. Agree. There is some serious cui bono in all this. It was just that particular part of the statement he made where I thought he’d been slipped acid or a roofie or something…cuz…damn. And I understand other R’s running don’t want this anchor hung around they’re necks.

    And if he wins he wins, if he looses he looses. Them’s the breaks. I’m counting on the gnat like attention of average voters who were watching DVR’d episodes of America’s Got Talent, never even heard of this. It’ll be a campaign commercial for Obama, but the news cycle will have moved well past.

    I hope.

  33. Silver Whistle says:

    But because he’s a functioning retard that belongs nowhere near the United States Code.

    And this distinguishes him from the other 534 members?

  34. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    And this distinguishes him from the other 534 members?

    It’s not so much that I “walked into that one”, it’s that you guys are smart enough that it should have happened earlier.

    After all, an Alzheimer’s patient is a heartbeat from the Oval.

  35. McGehee says:

    An Alzheimer’s patient who was previously one of the Senate’s most respected members.

  36. sdferr says:

    Thomas Sowell’s take on Dinesh D’Souzas’ documentary movie, which is apparently doing well at the box office.

  37. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    I remember that McGehee.

    Biden was respected along with Robert “Grand KKK Kleagal” Byrd, and Teddy “just breathe through your gills Mary Jo, I’m out of scotch…I’ll be right back” Kennedy.

  38. palaeomerus says:

    “She wants to be Oprah.”

    Oprah doesn’t even want to be Oprah these days. She’s fallen a long way. She’s stuck on cable now. CABLE.

    She’s decayed to the Chuck Woolery/Skip Stephenson/ Hollywood Squares guest level of celebrity.

  39. Jeff G. says:

    But he didn’t stop there. He went on about how a woman’s reproductive system “shuts down during that kind of thing.”

    Yeah, getting the truth about what a religious conservative meant from Ace’s blog was probably not the best idea, LYBD.

    I’m still recovering from learning how Rick Santorum was going to make me wear dead children around my neck and eat nothing but Christ Crackers on Sundays. Or, if he were ever to be elected President, would outlaw Gabriel Malor.

  40. Ernst Schreiber says:

    … I think he was trying to say, “Don’t punish the infant for the rape. It’s not the child’s fault how it was conceived.” There’s adoption and whatnot.

    But he didn’t stop there. He went on about how a woman’s reproductive system “shuts down during that kind of thing.” A sitting US Congressman running

    In point of fact lamont, he did stop there.

    You know, I think there should be some punishment but the punishment ought to be on the rapist and not attacking the child.”

    Your problem is that he didn’t start there.

    “Well, you know, uh, people always want to try to make that [i.e. a rape exception to a general abortion ban] as one of those things, Well, how do you – how do you slice this particularly tough sort of ethical question.

    “It seems to me first of all from what I understand from doctors that’s really rare. If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down. But let’s assume that maybe that didn’t work or something. You know, I think there should be some punishment but the punishment ought to be on the rapist and not attacking the child.”

    Or to put it another way, your problem seems to be that he didn’t choose his words with better care, and that was, shall we say, unhelpful.

    youbigdummy [smirk]

  41. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Fair enough Jeff. We’ll just have to differ some. The Santorum or Palin crap was all generated by their side. The whole “The other” thing. Ok. You could argue context and play their game, or you could say “fuck you and your juvenile play ground I know you are but what am I?” idiocy. We’re busy trying to save the Republic. But, you gotta admit this was a bit different.

    And by “what a religious conservative meant”, I’m curious as to what you took from the magical, “little to no legitimate rape pregnancy because of rape proof vaginas” statement.

    It sure as fuck wasn’t a lucid statement.

    What was he attempting to say? “Most “legitimate” rapes don’t occur during the ovulation period of a woman’s cycle”? Ok…but dude. He didn’t say that.

    Again, I get where you’re coming from and agree in concept, (screw the venue in which I read the thing that stuck out to me…don’t matter), but you can’t square that circle with that part of Akin’s remark.

  42. palaeomerus says:

    sdferr says August 22, 2012 at 12:10 pm
    What a functioning retard’s CV looks like.

    Meh. Akin is a mere engineer. Sure, they know a little math and technical jargon, but they can’t write “Hills like White Elephants” or other great freshman lit short stories like a humanities major can. Happyfeet taught us THAT. Why a fancy calculator could do most of an engineer’s job. It’s dead end busy work meant to productively occupy mediocre minds.

    (insert rolling eyes emoticon)

  43. palaeomerus says:

    And obviously engineers are easily confused when evaluating womb security features. Nor do they instinctively know, as their betters do, that the words “rape” and “legitimate” will explode like political antimatter if they ever get too close.

  44. Jeff G. says:

    LYBD —

    It seems to me geoff B and Monster, among others, have been linking things related to that here the last two days. The “science” for the belief seems to come from Nazi studies on raped women. And even today, fertility clinics, OB/GYNs, etc., speak to the factor of stress on either conception or carrying to term.

    I would think rape is a stressful occurrence, especially if by rape we’re talking “legitimate” (or forceful) rape.

    But then, who knows. I think it’s more fun just to laugh at the silly godbotherers until we need their votes to save the country.

  45. Jeff G. says:

    Also, as palaeomerus just pointed out, Akin is a functionally retarded engineer.

    Good thing those math / physics exams don’t ask him about where babies come from, or how long ago dinosaurs were put into the fossil record by the Devil to fool us and make us distrust Jesus.

  46. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    Ernst,

    Start there or end there…If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down. But let’s assume that maybe that didn’t work or something.

    So now we’re assuming that on rare occasion her super hero anti-rape powers don’t stop the rape sperm. It’s just stupid on a galactic scale. It’s not “choosing words better”, he’s claiming “doctors” are telling him this!

    We can all agree to disagree on this Akin thing here or there, and I’m not trying to start any pissing match, but good grief.

  47. Jeff G. says:

    Did you miss what I just posted?

  48. palaeomerus says:

    Well you can’t go around learning stuff from Nazi’s jeff.

    The whole concept of ‘Nazi’ is insidious and infectious. It rewrites your mental DNA. They were bad people Jeff. You have to reject EVERYTHING they said and did. That includes seemingly good Nazi stuff stuff like exercising, eating healthy, and being kind to animals. Once you start down that Nazi road there is no going back. Just ask Charles Johnson. He’ll tell ya. You have to be an anti-nazi at all times. It is a rigorous discipline. You think “what would the nazi do” and then you do the opposite, or you’ll black out, and wake up in Fallschirmjäger gear on the Polish border and then the nightmare will start again.

  49. Ernst Schreiber says:

    You know, the only way we’re going to resolve this “incidence of pregnancy after forcible rape” dilemna is to work up a Number Six.

    FOR SCIENCE!

  50. palaeomerus says:

    Okay.

    That shit I just posted was too cynical and maliciously sarcastic even for me. Sorry. I’m in a bad place today. I need to just sit on my rage for a few days I think. It’s been doing too much of the driving lately.

  51. Jeff G. says:

    Not all that long ago Ms Malkin was worried about how the music of Kid Rock might poison the Bush daughters’ inauguration party with its devil lyrics and hypersexualized rhythms. And she’s going to tell me I need to believe an engineer thinks there’s a magic vagina with a rape kill switch?

    As I noted, the science behind the piece informing what he said came from stress studies on concentration camp rapes.

    Others here have noted that this belief was fairly widespread in the pro-life community for quite some time, though it may no longer be the case.

    At the very least, you’d think people who back a party platform that is pro life would have heard of this and not reacted to as if the Christer didn’t believe rape could actually produce pregnancy.

  52. Ernst Schreiber says:

    What was he attempting to say?

    I think Akin was trying to say too much too succinctly, which is the entire problem with a soundbite driven media culture.

    If you want substantive people who can discuss substantive issues substantively, stop catering to the low-info short attention span voter!

  53. leigh says:

    Never mind Akin. What pearls of wisdom has Joe Biden gifted us with today at his three (3) fund-raisers in Detroit?

  54. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    stop catering to the low-info short attention span voter!

    I’d love for that to happen! But…other than a few of us here and there…that’s the majority of the electorate.

    And sorry Jeff. I read it after I posted comment (took the dog to, uh, water the neighbors flowers and commented before hitting “refresh”).

    Others here have noted that this belief was fairly widespread in the pro-life community for quite some time, though it may no longer be the case.

    I don’t picket abortion clinics, but I’m pro-life and this is all news to me. But I can imagine outside of a Ron Paul/Stormfront gathering, it’s probably not in the pro-life movements best interest to quote Nazi “medical studies”. True or not, that’s some heavy ammo for the other side. Also, I think “stress factors” in a Nazi death camp came from more than just a “rape pregnancy”. And “being able to carry to term”? Well, half one rotten weevil infested potato a week for sustenance, disease ridden bunk houses, the threat of death at any moment, and smoke stacks billowing carbon and ash (both from humans, and possibly people they knew), sure I can see a female body “shutting down that process”.

  55. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    And if you meant “occupation rapes” (France, Holland, Italy, etc) I guess maybe that’s different. We know what those countries did to Nazi collaborators. Especially the women. The men just got shot.

  56. leigh says:

    Thanks pala!

  57. Lamontyoubigdummy says:

    What pearls of wisdom has Joe Biden gifted us with today at his three (3) fund-raisers in Detroit?

    I think they now just have him communicating in grunts and whistles at these things while a WH minder (kinda like Scientology) stands in front of the microphones and “translates”.

  58. leigh says:

    Ooh! Romney throws down on the prezi.

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