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“Orator Obama offers fainting crowd advice on how to stand listening to him”

Move over, Bill O’Reilly.  It’s Obama who these days is looking out for you:

It’s the kind of thing that would have been all over the news all weekend with a previous president.

President Obama was — what else? — campaigning for reelection in a warm, muggy Roanoke, Virginia Friday. He was going on and on, as he seems to do more and more these days.

Suddenly, members of the crowd of about 3,000 began toppling over like flies, no doubt overwhelmed by the voice and words of the Real Good Talker. “This happens at every event,” the president of the United States said modestly.

Spotting his audience collapsing in the heat, Obama didn’t wrap up his remarks. He had more to say. Instead, he began offering medical advice about how people should stand in the heat, you know, bend your knees, drink lots of water, etc. (Scroll down for video)

He also reassured them that “paralegals” were on the way to offer help while he finished talking.

Then, of course, with the crowd laughing at his latest malaprop, the president of these 57 states caught himself, laughed and said, “Paralegals? You don’t need lawyers.”

Officially, the White House did not blame George W. Bush for the error.

Well, not directly, at least.  But if pressed, the White House almost certainly would blame the heat, and the heat, as we know, is a product of global climate change — itself the fault of human industry, as well as human exhalation/plant food, and so, indirectly, the fault of individual humans then taken in the aggregate.

So I guess they did kind of blame George Bush, after all.

Which is reassuring — in much the same way it’s strangely reassuring to know that every time Obama opens his mouth he’s bound to tell at least one lie.  In fact, it’s really the  most consistent trait of his Presidency.

 

 

50 Replies to ““Orator Obama offers fainting crowd advice on how to stand listening to him””

  1. sdferr says:

    That business? You didn’t built that.

    You’ll own what you’re assigned. And then it’s time to pay.

  2. cranky-d says:

    He is such an easy target. He could not survive the kind of scrutiny the average Republican gets.

  3. leigh says:

    Buh-rock, have a seat. We the people have been reviewing your fitness reports for these past three and a half years since you’ve been with the firm. As we’ve spoken about before, you just don’t seem to be getting the job done and, it fact, are actively rejecting the mission statement of what we stand for. Time and again we have called you in and explained policy to you and your team leaders. Sadly for you, even replacing a good many of your foot soldiers with new hires who were more thoroughly vetted hasn’t done the trick. Normally when we take the bull by the horns as we did in the 2010 midterm elections, a man in your position gets the message and corrects his course. Despite many opportunities to reflect on your mistakes, you have not chosen to do so and instead have doubled-down.

    Buh-rock, we here in the USA have weighed these matters carefully and have found you wanting. Unfortunately, you are not the man for this job. Son, we’re going to let you go.

  4. Silver Whistle says:

    Son, we’re going to let you go.

    Racist.

  5. LBascom says:

    Channeling Jeff Goldstein:

    “While we’re at it Sheriff Joe in Arizona [expletive] you,” said Lopez, before going on a profanity laced tirade. […]

    “Get some guts, come down here and meet me face to face. Let’s see how you act then,” Arpaio told the station.

  6. leigh says:

    Son, we’re going to let you go.

    Racist.

    Heh. It’s said with a patronising firm hand on the shoulder to steer one out the door.

  7. Silver Whistle says:

    The “George Lopez” show host was angry when talking about Arizona’s Sheriff Joe Arpaio, who made headlines nationwide when endorsing the SB 1070 law, which gives police enforcement the right to ask anyone who they come across and who they suspect is living in the United States illegally.

    You can’t expect anyone to tell the truth these days.

  8. leigh says:

    “Get some guts, come down here and meet me face to face.”

    Lee, I watched a documentary about Sheriff Joe’s Tent City this weekend. (Did you know he’s from Massachusetts? I didn’t.) He did a guided tour of the tent cities for the photogs and talked to the prisoners while he was there. He asked them how they liked it and naturally, they all groused about the food, the teevee channels that were available and the heat. His answer? “Then don’t come back.” And to douchebags like Lopez, “I’m just doing my job that I’ve been elected to do six times in a row now.”

  9. McGehee says:

    January 20, 2013

    Obama: “Um, Mr. America? I just came to clock in and my time card isn’t in the slot anymore. And I went to my locker and all my stuff is in a box on the bench and somebody else’s name and lock are on my locker. And now Ralph from security is telling me he has to escort me off the premises. So, I’m just wondering, is there something you need to tell me?”

    Mr. America: “Only the same thing I’ve been telling you since November 6. You’re fired. You don’t work here anymore. You will not receive any more paychecks. You’re no longer authorized to be in this building. I will not be writing you any recommendations. Get the hell out of here.”

    Obama: (long pause) “So, um, see you tomorrow then?”

  10. LBascom says:

    Unfortunately McGehee, Obama will be picking up his quarter million a year paycheck for the rest of his life.

  11. leigh says:

    I believe he only gets SS protection for ten, though. So there’s that.

  12. George Orwell says:

    Just thinking about Queen Barack’s “you didn’t build nuthin’ by yousef” schtick, it occurs to me that day by day She is looking more and more like Ivy Starnes from Atlas Shrugged. Think about the noxious unspoken assumption. You did nothing by yourself, you have nothing except for the forbearance and effort of others… in fact, you not only don’t deserve to claim anything exclusively for yourself, by Her own tortured illogic you own nothing. All of your “hard work” is eclipsed by others who came before you. You ingrate. All you have belongs to someone else. A perfect negation ownership and ultimately, self.

    Plus, Ivy Starnes is more butch than Barack. But then again, who isn’t?

  13. George Orwell says:

    Unfortunately McGehee, Obama will be picking up his quarter million a year paycheck for the rest of his life.

    Oh, just wait. Barry will become richer than Slick Willie, First Rapist of the White House and Authentic Black President. He will be a bigger thorn in our side than Jimmy Carter, and he won’t wait a moment to start trashing his predecessors, even Democrat ones.

  14. LBascom says:

    This is good, from instapundit:

    I DON’T KNOW, BUT UNDER OBAMACARE I’VE GOT A SINKING FEELING I’LL FIND OUT: Virginia Postrel: How Much Is Your Kidney Worth?

    UPDATE: Reader Michael Ryan emails: “If you are healthy, somebody along the line gave you some help. There was a great doctor somewhere in your life. Somebody helped to create this unbelievable American medical system that we have that allowed you to thrive. Somebody invested in bikepaths and broccoli. If you’ve got a healthy body — you didn’t build that. Somebody else made that happen. Cyclosporine didn’t get invented on its own.”

    And reader Kevin Murphy writes: “Just remember, organ donation isn’t a mandate, it’s a tax.”

  15. motionview says:

    Ok I’m thinking to myself do I mention this or is it just silly? Then I see a Scalia / intentionalism post go up and I don’t care, here’s teh silliness, I have reading to do:
    Peter Baker ?@peterbakernyt Not to be cynical, but press pool was out in motorcade ready to leave and then brought back into arena in time for successful kiss-cam redo.

    They don’t kiss normally, somebody else made that happen, and when they finally did they had to call the MBM back in to see the kiss, to erase the image of the Won getting booed for not being kissed by his wife.

  16. leigh says:

    Gross.

  17. Pablo says:

    Sununu lit the fuse. BOOM! About frigging time someone did it. Of course…

  18. “Well, not directly, at least. But if pressed, the White House almost certainly would blame the heat, and the heat, as we know, is a product of global climate change — itself the fault of human industry, as well as human exhalation/plant food, and so, indirectly, the fault of individual humans then taken in the aggregate.”

    But O! has told us no business (industry) was made by anyone…without government…so…ZOMG, GOVERMENT IS TO BLAME FOR AGW!1!1 /Leftie head exploding

  19. guinspen says:

    Suddenly, members of the crowd of about 3,000 began toppling over like flies.

    Well drop a domino on me.

  20. leigh says:

    Sununu has been a stealth bomber the last ten days or so.

    I likee.

  21. leigh says:

    Article also at Pablo’s link:

    The Republican governor of Texas today welcomed President Obama to the Lone Star State by asking him to distance himself from comments made by Attorney General Eric Holder comparing the state’s 2011 voter identification law to a “poll tax,” the Jim Crow-era laws that were declared unconstitutional in 1937. “Perhaps while the President is visiting Texas, he can take a break from big-dollar fundraisers to disavow his Attorney General’s offensive and incendiary comments regarding our common-sense voter identification law,” Gov. Rick Perry said in a statement. “In labeling the Texas voter ID law as a ‘poll tax,’ Eric Holder purposefully used language designed to inflame passions and incite racial tension. It was not only inappropriate, but simply incorrect on its face. The president should apologize for Holder’s imprudent remarks and for his insulting lawsuit against the people of Texas.”

  22. Caecus Caesar says:

    If you’ve got a book — you didn’t write that.

    Somebody else made that happen.

  23. BigBangHunter says:

    – Meanwhile, as the first couple do staged public appearences (badly), and the Progressive campaign boiler room Bains endlessly at the moon, reality keeps sticking its ugly head out of the Wonces hidey/just ignore it box….

  24. BigBangHunter says:

    …..and while we’re on the subjecy the Dems are so intensly interested in, okay, lets talk.

    – I don’t really mind helping the Left distract from THE DISASTEROOUS FUCKING ECONOMY for a few days.

    – After all, we’ll always have Bernenke.

  25. leigh says:

    Romney is pounding Obama’s unhelpful remarks about small business.

    Heh.

  26. rjacobse says:

    People dropping from the heat, a.k.a. heat stroke.

    That’s serious, as in drop-dead (literally) serious.

    But #OccupyResoluteDesk tries to make it a (not-even-remotely-funny) “ha ha” moment that they’re fainting ‘cuz “I am so fricking AWESOME.”

    And then he keeps on with the verbal diarrhea, blathering on, exposing even MORE people to the risk of heat stroke.

    Puke.

  27. leigh says:

    rjacobse, Obama is blathering away in Texas right now and using the same stupid “joke” about out-sourcing vs. in-sourcing. He also wants to grow the economy from the middle out. What? The man has a screw loose.

  28. BigBangHunter says:

    – Latest Rassmussen presidential tracking poll.

    – You can see the Romney peaks, Obama dips, every time the economic numbers come out. Then Obama makes a small recovery by attacka like Bain, but not quite back to the same level, so his trend line is steadily downwards, and we still have more than three+ months of economic/job reports to go before the elections.

    – The Lefturds can’t be feeling real happy right now.

    – Also check out the job approval charts at the bottom of the page.

  29. leigh says:

    I saw that this morning, BBH. I haven’t been over to Intrade to see what the spread is lately, but last I looked they still have the Wonce as the favorite. Of course, they’re internet bookies, so they want to make money on sucker bets, too.

    Honestly, I can’t find anyone of the slobbering Obama fans from last time around who are over the moon with the idiot this time. I’m only saying “I told you so!” when no one can hear me. Everytime we have one of these cult of personality candidates: Kennedy, Clinton, Obama—the R’s have to spend years sweeping up their messes and re-establishing trust with our allies and fear in our enemies. Other than all the guys who were in love with Sarah Palin last time because they thought she was the hawt (I’m quoting my BIL who is 75), I can’t remember keeping a framed picture of the president on my night-table or swooning or criying when they spoke. I did take my kids to see Bush and Cheney when they did their whistle stop tour in Pittsburgh and that was fun, but no one fell to the ground and spoke in tongues, thank goodness.

    I think Obama throwing out what he thinks was a witicism with the crack about outsourcing, he has stepped into the lion’s den since business is Romney’s niche. I heard someone call him the Stormin’ Mormon today. I laughed because he’s so reserved, but maybe he’ll get his Irish up after having his integrity attacked.

  30. Pablo says:

    I think Obama throwing out what he thinks was a witicism with the crack about outsourcing, he has stepped into the lion’s den since business is Romney’s niche.

    Ahem.

  31. leigh says:

    Yup, Pablo. The guy is turning dick-stomping into an art form.

  32. BigBangHunter says:

    – Yeh, I saw that earlier Pablo. Bummbledicks swooning loons are so focused on finding anything they can to cover Obama’s total lack of business acumin, and at the same time throw up smoke deflecting the economic horrors, they are running the Golden Urkle right into a wall.

    – Best of all, hes too fucking dumb to see it.

    – More, faster please.

  33. BigBangHunter says:

    – Mush as he’s hard to stomach in so many ways, I liked Trumps advice to Romney:

    – “Tell Obama you’ll show your tax records just as soon as he publishes his school records.”

  34. McGehee says:

    Leigh, does that mean the soles of Obama’s shoes have a mushroom bruise?

  35. newrouter says:

    romney rally report

    +mittens didn’t light his hair on fire but gave a good speech twitchy

    +carl cameron of fox kept almost walking into me while he was texting

    + someone ask john delano, kdka tv reporter and fdr relative, if he worked for fox news.

    +the ss made me give up the 3 ” adjustable wrench on my key chain

  36. leigh says:

    Yes it does, McGehee. Heh.

  37. sdferr says:

    You’re comparing the President to Mussolini.”

    Yeah, and? If the fascist fits, wear it, Barry. And you too, Barry surrogate Karl.

  38. leigh says:

    nr, was there a big crowd in Irwin? It was hard to tell from the teevee.

  39. palaeomerus says:

    Apparently he’s in Austin right now at the old Opera House (now called the music hall because…AUSTIN!)

    This is probably the one shithole city in Texas he can still raise significant money in. Because the people are dumb.

  40. palaeomerus says:

    When I say “he” I mean 0bama, his teleprompter, and his empty suit.

  41. leigh says:

    Hey now. One of my brothers lives there.

    I thought the Wonce ditched TOTUS? I’m hoping that’s true since it’s gaffe-tastic.

  42. newrouter says:

    nr, was there a big crowd in Irwin? It was hard to tell from the teevee.

    they filled the space @ 80% with 2 days notice for middle of the day event. also the co. that hosted is involve with the marcellus drilling in the region.

  43. newrouter says:

    good to know that there is sumthing called “austin city limits” to contain the mental disorder

  44. Danger says:

    That’s F’d up nr,

    Someone get bh on the red-phone; tell him to launch the forehead warhead.

  45. Danger says:

    “+carl cameron of fox kept almost walking into me while he was texting”

    Did the putz spot any Gucci shoes?

  46. Danger says:

    BigBangHunter says July 17, 2012 at 3:10 pm
    – Mush as he’s hard to stomach in so many ways, I liked Trumps advice to Romney:

    BBH,

    I’ll raise ya with this.

    When the time is right, (the first debate, perhaps) In response to Oblamer’s taunts, Romney should offer to discloses any tax return he wants, just as soon as he drops that rediculous fast-n-furious executive priviledge claim.

    Then mock Obama with all of the same taunts he and his cronies have leveled at him. What are YOU hiding MR PRESIDENT???

  47. Danger says:

    Speaking of F’d up things

  48. Swen says:

    I believe he only gets SS protection for ten, though. So there’s that.

    After that he’s got to find his own hookers and blow, eh?

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