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Doomsday Machine May Fail to Function Properly [Dan Collins]

So, there’s still hope for Algore.

Frankly, this is the sort of story PJM ought to send JTR to cover.

Back in the day, we didn’t have to wait for Europeans to do this sort of thing. I think that the US could build a far superior doomsday machine to theirs that would make excellent use of some of this stimulus package.

More disappointment: Blago omits playing race card

Morenoneoversoever:

“Remember that the egg of power will drop if held too loosely; and an egg cannot break a rock. Okay, maybe if it’s some sort of crazy unbreakable super-duper-power egg. But then you can’t make an omelet without breaking some eggs, and neither can you make an omelet with broken rocks. It would taste like crap, and be hella hard on your teeth enamel. That is why you should probably just order the waffles.”
Luo

Lay your bets, gentlemen. I’m going with “no”.

51 Replies to “Doomsday Machine May Fail to Function Properly [Dan Collins]”

  1. Joe says:

    Well if that is the case, let the stimulus go forward. I propose a 400 million dollar junket to Las Vegas for me.

  2. mojo says:

    Tralfamadorian speaker: We know how the world ends and it has nothing to do with Earth, except that it gets wiped out too.
    Billy Pilgrim: Really? How does it end?
    Tralfamadorian speaker: While we’re experimenting with new fuels, a Tralfamadorian test pilot panics, presses the wrong button, and the whole universe disappears.
    Billy Pilgrim: But you have to stop him. If you know this, can’t you keep the pilot from pressing …
    Tralfamadorian speaker: He has always pressed it, and he always will. We have always let him, and we always will let him. The moment is structured that way.
    — Slaughterhouse Five

  3. DarthRove says:

    I propose we all deposit one penny into a savings account, then make a reservation at Milliways. And never leave.

  4. B Moe says:

    That artist’s conception is pretty trippy, I wonder if you could get one of those in fluorescent paint on black velvet?

  5. Joe says:

    If we are going to have Vonnegut doomsdays, I vote for Ice Nine.

  6. Bob Reed says:

    Maybe it will eat up alllllll the excess CO2 in the atmosphere; a win-win for everyone!

    Imagine the carbon credits they’d be able to sell…

    B-B-But, that might put saint AL out of bidness…
    *
    *
    *
    Like I Said, A Win-Win ALL THE WAY AROUND!

  7. JHoward says:

    It’s said al has a brain the size of a planet.

  8. Joe says:

    So is PJM going to fund you guys covering this? Or are they sending Green again.

  9. Bob Reed says:

    I wonder what the Euro-Greenie-Weenie’s think about all this..?

    In a word?

    !!1!1!eleventy!11!1!

    or should it be…

    !!1!1!ONZE!11!1!

    or

    !!1!1!ELF!11!1!

  10. I thought all doomsday machines were built by strangely suave men who speak English with an untraceable but vaguely European accent.

  11. Dan Collins says:

    I didn’t know you were a bigot, LMC.

  12. Joe says:

    “Comment by Lost My Cookies on 1/29 @ 1:50 pm #

    “I thought all doomsday machines were built by strangely suave men who speak English with an untraceable but vaguely European accent.”

    The device is in Bern.
    Don’t a few Swiss scientists fit that description.

  13. Joe says:

    When science screams” From that other PJM commentator, Reynolds.

  14. Kevin B says:

    Having resisted making Italian jokes and noticed that the Fat Al jokes have already been made, all that’s left for me to comment on is the impressive way that Fox news covered the story on their web site.

    Click here to read a discussion on a science site; Click here to download the paper.

    What sort of journalism is that?

    Our own dear Auntie Beeb would never consider sending her readers to such places. They might stumble across some troubling facts or theories that Auntie hadn’t spun for them, and then where would she be.

  15. mcgruder says:

    i denounce doomsday machines–women and minorities disproportionately affected.

  16. I wouldn’t call myself a bigo… wait, there are Italians involved?

    Greasy bastards are going to kill us all.

  17. Sdferr says:

    SarahW linked these cool web-cam views of the LHC at the pub awhile back.

  18. Carin says:

    Soooo … should I stop paying my mortgage now? May as well live it up….

  19. McGehee says:

    I think all this talk of black holes destroying the world is terribly racist.

  20. slackjawedyokel says:

    I will not worry unless they plan to turn the damned thing on at precisely 12:00am GMT on December 21st, 2012.

  21. Dan Collins says:

    I just want to drunkblog the end of the world, if it’s all the same to you guys.

  22. Joe says:

    Drunkbloging® is the registered property of Stephen Green, an honored and special Pajama Media member. Please cease and desist using the term.

  23. Dan Collins says:

    Fine. I’ll brunkdlog it.

  24. happyfeet says:

    oh. Black hole thingers are like one of my biggest nemeses.

  25. happyfeet says:

    Them and actors.

  26. happyfeet says:

    oh. Terry Gross should get a mention. Miserable socialist ferret-woman.

  27. Dan Collins says:

    Turn-offs: Malfunctioning doomsday machines

  28. N. O'Brain says:

    “#Comment by happyfeet on 1/29 @ 3:02 pm #

    oh. Black hole thingers are like one of my biggest nemeses.

    #Comment by happyfeet on 1/29 @ 3:04 pm #

    Them and actors.”

    How can you tell the difference?

  29. N. O'Brain says:

    How about sharks with frikkin’ lasers on their heads?

  30. B Moe says:

    How can you tell the difference?

    Black holes don’t need make-up to be attractive.

  31. Dave E. says:

    Thanks, Sdferr. That link is hilarious.

  32. Mikey NTH says:

    Another group horning in my act!

  33. Techie says:

    Breaking news: Blago out in Illinois, unanimous vote. Then they decided to rub salt on the wound, voting that he can never hold elected office in the state ever again.

    Dude.

  34. Rod Blagojavich says:

    Fuck em, a union lobbyist gig pays better anyway.

  35. Joe says:

    From Ace of Spades (another honored Pajamas Media associate):

    Buh-bye Blago, you’ll be missed.

    Wow, now they are just rubbing salt in the wound. The Senate is voting to prohibit Blago from ever holding office in the state again. Ouch.

    Now he doesn’t have an office to trade in his criminal case. I wonder if he has any names he’d like to name.

    Senator Rolland Burris only comment was, “I’m still Senator, right?” Technically, I may have made that up.

    Thanks to Slu for the heads up on the vote and of course “The Blago Skull”. Damn I’m going to miss that.

    http://ace.mu.nu/archives/282014.php

  36. happyfeet says:

    This is that governor that was Baracky’s governor of choice. Twice I think. Baracky is an idiot. An idiot with very poor judgment. It’s very sad.

  37. guinsPen says:

    I don’t know Joe.

  38. happyfeet says:

    Joe. I like Joe better than this guy in my office what is talking on and on about how he doesn’t like carrots. Wtf? I swear I said nothing to encourage him. How random. I’m pretending this is very urgent so maybe he will go away. Carrots carrots carrots. Good God.

  39. Mikey NTH says:

    I would suggest that Rod go on ‘Dancing With the Stars’. He has such awesome political hair.

  40. Carin says:

    Happyfeet, I need that information STAT. You tell carrot-guy you gotta go.

  41. happyfeet says:

    Thanks, Carin. He went away after deciding what we needed to do is all get together and keep a bowl of fresh vegetables in the conference room to eat in the afternoons. But not carrots. NG nodded. I nodded. Workplace socialists. It’s the future.

  42. guinsPen says:

    Future?

  43. happyfeet says:

    oh. Just check here. It’s easy.

  44. guinsPen says:

    It’s easy.

  45. happyfeet says:

    Sorry!! The requested URL is blocked

    Time: Thu Jan 29 19:53:28 2009
    URL: http://www.youtube.com/watch
    Category: Streaming Media
    Ticket ID: {6893E506-EE68-11DD-8100-00000000A6A6}

    I will click when I get home. I am oppressed.

  46. Rob Crawford says:

    Oh, happyfeet, I feel your pain.

  47. guinsPen says:

    All you need is love, love.

    Love is all you need…

  48. guinsPen says:

    don’t let me dO!wn

  49. happyfeet says:

    oh. The Beatles sing songs of love. You know it was pretty special when they drop confetti after.

  50. happyfeet says:

    cute. cuter.

    my work here is done

  51. Teh Borg Picard says:

    I am no cutest?

Comments are closed.