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Overheard at my neighborhood filling station

Young lady with sub compact: “What bothered me about her were all those winks at the camera last night. I don’t care how cute you think you are, you can’t just wink at terrorists and make them forget about wanting to blow up schools and shopping malls.”

Young man in baseball hat: “– Unless you’re Obama, of course.”

Young lady with sub compact: “Well, that’s like, more metaphorical than what I was going for. But point taken.”

33 Replies to “Overheard at my neighborhood filling station”

  1. Mr. Pink says:

    But doesn’t understand that the terrorist only want to blow us up because of lack of empathy for the pain of a grieving child? Or something like that I don’t know my brain has a low tolerance for remembering bullshit.

  2. urthshu says:

    Baracky is a charming guy, though

  3. Mr. Pink says:

    And also for correct sentence structure and spelling. That should have read, “doesn’t Obama understand”.

  4. alppuccino says:

    I wonder if Sarah can still shoot the 3. If she beat O at a 3-point shooting contest, that would be hilarious. Can we set it up?

  5. Pablo says:

    You know what you need to do to keep terrorists from wanting to blow us up? Offer them hope. And change. And maybe surrender to them, assuming you can find them.

  6. DarthRove says:

    al, you want to see O! shoot hoops?

    Racist.

  7. happyfeet says:

    I dunno know how much it costs to fill my tank Joe cause I don’t have enough monies and I can’t do the fractions and math and stuff so alls I know is I put the nozzle here and I have to wait til that nummer there on the tank is close to the nummer of monies in my wallet. You have a differnt way you do it?

  8. alppuccino says:

    you got me there.

  9. alppuccino says:

    You have a differnt way you do it?

    Well yeah stoop. I’m doing pretty well now. I have a nice senator’s salary and a beautiful home which is my total investment, so I’m doing pretty well. But the real neat thing is that I have this card that the people of Delaware, well you Joey Bagadonuts of South Nosehairshire, you provide me with this card that pays for all of my gas. I just stick it in the pump and then I have my wife put the hose in while I floss. Look at her. Isn’t she gorgeous. The ultra honey! NO NO NOT THE REGULAR! THE ULTRA!

  10. Obstreperous Infidel says:

    Perfect. The double standard is the thing. Don’t hide behind that shit. Embrace that shit. Be that shit. To be honest, both sides do it. It’s just that the progs are louder and more annoying.

  11. Matt says:

    Pablo – Yes offering hope and change to terrorists is often a effective strategy. Often conflict has it’s roots in a sense of disenfranchisement. Working to alleviate this feeling can be most effective. A person who feels they can guide their current world and does not feel trapped and harrassed is far less likely to want to blow you up. Attitudes of tribalism and revenge on the other hand only beget further violence.

  12. Pablo says:

    Matt, I’m sure there are some great examples of that, aside from the obvious hope and change embodied in the ascendancy of Hamas. Feel free to point them out.

  13. alppuccino says:

    A person who feels they can guide their current world and does not feel trapped and harrassed is far less likely to want to blow you up. Attitudes of tribalism and revenge on the other hand only beget further violence.

    Like all those rich kids and doctors and trust funders that turned to terrorism. That’s not fair though. They probably watched a lot of really violent TV.

  14. alppuccino says:

    And happy, I piggy-backed on your funniness which is what I always do because I couldn’t generate an original thought if my life depended on it. I feel trapped.

    Now where is my Members Only jacket?

  15. urthshu says:

    Bailout’s been passed.

  16. urthshu says:

    In the House, I mean. What’s next?

  17. TaiChiWawa says:

    Listening to House leaders talk about the passage of the Emergency Economic Stabilization Act . . . Now we know that Barney Frank, Nancy Pelosi, and Barach Obama just saved the nation.

  18. alppuccino says:

    What’s next?

    Having it declared unconstitutional.

    Palin = stocks go up
    Bailin’ = stocks go down

  19. Sdferr says:

    The first thing, urthshu, seems to be “sell on the news”. Next, economic recession for, oh, six to nine months if all goes well.

  20. kelly says:

    Next, economic recession for, oh, six to nine months if all goes well.

    Nah. The economy will look dramatically better around the end of Jan. ’09 once O!‘s sworn in. Trust me on this.

  21. Alec Leamas says:

    Andrew “Pokey” Sullivan sez: Obama’s face soothes the savage terrorist.

  22. ducktrapper says:

    Wait! There are “neighborhood” filling stations? Weird zoning where Biden comes from, no?

  23. Mr. Pink says:

    Why was the Obamabot at a filling station I thought oil makes us sick? God dam polluting bitch.

  24. scooter (still not libby) says:

    Attitudes of tribalism and revenge on the other hand only beget further violence.

    Where do people holding signs that read “Behead those who offend Islam” fit in? I think you should take your message to one of those places. Unless they frighten you. Which is OK.

  25. ushie says:

    Wow. Matt’s much better at the troll schtick than I am.

  26. Spies, Brigands, and Pirates says:

    Wait! There are “neighborhood” filling stations?

    Under Our Dear Leader Obama’s Great Leap Forward, the oil companies will be nationalized. No more of that wasteful competition — each neighborhood will have a state-run filling station, for maximum convenience in handling the ration stamps and the People’s Board for Trip Necessity Oversight.

  27. Bob Reed says:

    Shouldn’t that young lady have been riding a bicycle, y’know, to be green and all?

    And that young man, is he the gas jockey? If so, why would he be taking part in the murder of our environment…

    Shouldn’t they both be trying to convince the homeless and other “idiots” to register and vote for O! ???

  28. Obstreperous Infidel says:

    #24, of course Matt would shit his hemp jeans if he EVER had to try and “dialogue” with the Jihadi. It’s not the religion, it’s our coca colas and x-boxes.

  29. ducktrapper says:

    Heck, I’d almost be proud to be murdered by these poor victimized but essentially fine folks.

  30. McGehee says:

    Overheard at my neighborhood filling station:

    Man in ball cap: “This place didn’t have any gas yesterday.”

    Man in another ball cap: “Nope.”

    Man in ball cap: “Saw they had gas today, I thought the place’d be packed.”

    Man in another ball cap: “Yep.”

    Man in ball cap: “Ain’t, though.”

    Man in another ball cap: “Nope.”

    Man in ball cap: “Must be that hope ‘n’ change stuff finally making a difference.”

    Man in another ball cap: <snort> “You ’bout made me swallow my chaw.”

    Man in ball cap: “Heh heh heh.”

  31. donald says:

    I know those guys McGeehee, they’re assholes. Or the salt of the earth, I forget which.

  32. jms says:

    Barack Obama winked at Bill Ayers?

  33. Dread Cthulhu says:

    jms: “Barack Obama winked at Bill Ayers?”

    ORIENTATIONALIST!!

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