Whether Dr. Helen intentionally unlocked this Pandora’s Box for Halloween is an open question, but she wonders, “Should Men Get Married?” So far, it appears that the answer is, “No. Only women should get married.”
Here’s your chance, both men and women, to vent about your most disastrous “love” relationships.
Married? Buy her a house and quit while you are ahead.
So, I dated this woman for 4 years and then I killed her. What a disaster.
There isn’t enough room here for that.
How about “I loved her but she just wanted somebody to date while her fiancee made up his mind, but we worked together so we got in each other’s way all the time and finally I made a complete ass of myself in front of my co-workers and then she went away and got married” disastrous?
That’s the spirit, Jonathan!
Geez. And I’ve been thinkin’ “Well, you’re in your mid-30s; might want to think about getting married and stuff.”
All I’ve got is another one of those patented ought-to-be-a-punchline-that-violates-Disney-trademark stories. (i.e., “She’s Fucking Goofy!”)
…and the worst part was, I was Goofy.
I got nothing.
Sometimes my husband breaks the internets. He’s never broken my heart.
I take that back. He broke off our engagement in ’87. That broke my heart.
But it worked out in the end.
Bastard!
I pump my wife’s gas, I wash the windshield while I’m doing so, and I get up early when it snows to shovel. We get along great. I want us to be the that old couple walking down the street holding hands and I do something every day to make sure my wife knows it.
As a result, we have a syrupy sweet and happy relationship.
Don’t get wrong; it’s not easy but it’s definitely worth it.
I got married only six months ago, so I’m still in the happy zone. Do have one funny ex-galf’nd story, though:
So we’ve been dating about two months, and it’s getting a bit boring, to tell the truth–she’s kind of an flighty geek–and I was smelling change on the horizon.
I move in to give her a nice smooch–this being largely the basis of our relationship–and she kisses back for a moment or two before breaking off and saying to me, with all the perkiness of a six-year-old who just discovered the first robin of spring “Guess WHAT?”
She proceeded to inform me that she was now dating the drummer of this band she knew. I wished her a good night and walked, laughing, up my driveway. Haven’t seen the goofball since.
Round 1: loved the institution of marrage, wife went to a different institution and tried to drive me there as well.
Round 2: as they say, second marriages are the triumph of hope over experience. He shoots, he scores. “So this is what it’s supposed to be like? Not bad… not bad at all.”
‘Love’ is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.
–Jubal Harshaw in Stranger in a Strange Land
-Robert A. Heinlein
Mr. scotch, that would be a good thing, indeed.
My wife and I celebrated our 28th anniversary last month.
Congrats, NO’B.
The current state of marital law is probably enough to keep me away. Or maybe I just use it as an excuse. I haven’t decided that one, yet.
I had about 4 years of scorched earth, 3 dates or less time so that I could find one worth keeping. I knew I had found her when she came over one Saturday and I told here that I’d be watching the Frozen Four, the early hockey game on ESPN2, the 7pm game on ESPN and the late game on the deuce. She just sat there and read/watched the games all day and never bitched about going out. She even made fun of Barry Melrose’s mullet.
We’ve been togather for the last 15 years.
My stories of misery and tales of woe in regards to “love” generally spring from the time when I still drank. They were generally self-inflicted, and to an outside observer, quite funny. I will not bore you with them. I am a better man now.
These kind of questions always remind me of that great movie where I find most of my philosophies in life: McClintock!
Chill Wills: Divorce. Is that where you pay a woman not to live with you?
Am I the only one around here that thoroughly dislikes Halloween?
It’s my favorite. For real. My favorite Halloween moment so far this year is going to pick up lunch this morning – there is a checker there, he used to be a bagger, which was kind of unusual cause he only has the one arm. This morning he had on his hook (sometimes he goes without) and was dressed as a pirate and I thought he might be the coolest person I meet all day.
I seem to recall that Atlas Shrugs hates teh Halloween.
Ya know, I REALLY want to vent here — it’s even on topic — but I’m still trying to figure out just what the hell’s going on.
I wanted kids; she wanted a hysterectomy.
Do I win the brevity prize?
Don’t torture yourself, Rob. It never really gets any better.
Halloween is awesome, and so is my wife.
I got nuthin’.
– Ok. This thing is eating my posts again.
– Except that one of course.
OK, resolved: men should not get married; only women should get married. That makes no damn sense — anyone else see a potential problem with that arrangement?
Going traditionalist on us, cynn?
What cynn said!
Before marriage I was completely fickle. Never had a relationship that lasted more than 8 months. That was one, the rest were like 3 months. I wasn’t a serious person. I was their disaster I suppose and I regret that.
Three months does not a disaster make and if it does they were unstable anyway.
Three months does not a disaster make and if it does they were unstable anyway.
Amateur.
A good disaster can be churned out in a month.
I should know, I’ve done it twice.
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Comment by cynn on 10/31 @ 4:15 pm #
OK, resolved: men should not get married; only women should get married. That makes no damn sense  anyone else see a potential problem with that arrangement?
Nope. I’m good with it.
…So I take that as a resounding support for lesbian marriage? But only if you get to watch the honeymoon videos.
How about “I loved her but she just wanted somebody to date until she made up her mind whether to leave her abusive husband or not, but we worked together so we got in each other’s way all the time and finally I made a complete ass of myself in front of my co-workers and then she went away and stayed with her husband for the sake of their child and the fat paycheck he brought home†disastrous?
Wow.. deja vu…
Married, 22 years.
I gots nothin’.
And everything.
Halloween fright? Well, there was the time when the starter wife informed me that she was pretty well sure I was in cahoots with the Martians who had kidnapped her and planted the electrodes in her brain. I suppose I should take that one across the street to Dr. Helen’s.
I would never realize what a lazy, inconsiderate dope I am, if I didn’t have a wife to tell me so.
NTTAWWT, of course.
Prior to my wife, and she might include herself in this list, I am certain that I managed to be the nightmare for many women. I did almost every reprehensible thing a guy could do. About the only bastardly thing I drew the line at was telling a girl I loved her to get her in bed. I was a poster child for bachelors.
My better half has made me a better man.
Amateur.
I was just trying to make her feel better is all. You’re right of course. And then there’s cell phones screwing things up all over the place. Those thingers really need to come with fingerprint activation or something.
This one time, my bf and I were at Denny’s and somebody he knew came in and they started blabbin’ and I was being ignored, so I stealthily ate his last piece of bacon. I don’t think he ever forgave me for it. RTO and I laugh about it. BWAH HA HA HA HAaaaaaaa.
After the unfortunate demise of my long time girlfriend, er, I mean break up, I met a tremendous woman who I fell madly in love with and married. 12 years and two unbelievably beautiful children later, I would marry her all over again in a heartbeat. Marriage, thanks to my absolutely amazing wife, is a wonderful, wonderful thing.
I would marry my wife again. I could only hope that she would do the same.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But after years apart, being able to connect with someone and being TOTALLY COMFORTABLE talking to her, remembering all the good times, and the way her voice and laughter just seem to press all the right buttons…
I’m just a big, pathetic soft-hearted fool. But that’s why Pfizer made Zoloft, isn’t it?
Been with my live in for 6 years- she has a ring but we haven’t married and she doesn’t push. I think thats a good sign. There’s a serious inequity in our earnings though that always worries me – we don’t want kids so thats not a big deal but I’ve seen too many folks in my profession get taken to the cleaners by their ex-wives- divorce can ruin lives, especially financially. Maybe I’m cynical but I don’t know of one person in my office who has not been divorced at least once (except for me). My thought is that our current culture empowers the woman at the cost of demonizing and belittling the man (look no further than the way the man is treated by his wife in pretty much any major sitcom).
JFTR, in case anyone’s interested: I’ve been happily married for almost 15 years, now, so serious screwed-up relationships are a minimum of ~16.5 years in my past.
Reading that post is chilling. I’m pretty confident that my marriage won’t go that way, but I’ve been at it less than a year. Things can change.
However, one rule I seem pretty well determined to rebuff is all those guys who told me when I was getting married, half-jocularly, that all I needed to do was say “yes, dear”. I *never* say “yes, dear”, and I hope I never will, except in jest. I don’t see why I should never get mad, lose my stack, fight back. That makes us equals in my book.
Oh, and I’ve told her as much.
omment by cynn on 10/31 @ 6:17 pm #
…So I take that as a resounding support for lesbian marriage? But only if you get to watch the honeymoon videos.
Cynn. You have a lack of imagination. I’m currently married, however my wife isn’t.
The breakup of my marriage was bad, but not as disasterous as the breakup of my fiancee and I. I’m still in shellshock from it, and haven’t dated since (over a year). Imagine how bad it would have been if I had rushed into marriage, like she wanted to…