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Halloween Creep-Out Contest [Dan Collins]

Well, the Breitbart team haven’t posted in 5 days, so I suppose I must have creeped (crept?) that poor girl out. My apologies. Still, I don’t think I’m quite as creepy as either of these stories:

Story 1

Story 2

Which one do you think is creepier, and why?

Sad news. Somebody else just died.

Humor from 1968: Crazy Women Drivers!

Time to Euthanize the World?

22 Replies to “Halloween Creep-Out Contest [Dan Collins]”

  1. stace says:

    First Porter Wagoner, now Robert Goulet. Who will be the third?

  2. stace says:

    Watching the Dem debate, Kucinich is sounding kinda like Ron Paul on the constitution. That’s really creepy.

  3. happyfeet says:

    That’s how Evel Knievel is gonna die too.

  4. Big Bang (pumping you up.) says:

    – Since Sowin (Halloween, the celebration of “all hallows night”, or the night of the walking dead if you prefer Hollywoods version of things), was one more gift given onto humanity by the fun loving Irish and their Celtic ancestors, along with that other thing having something losely to do with snakes or some such, I doff my skull piece to you and your’s Dan.

    – The trick or treat part comes from leaving various food stuffs and gifts outside the villages to woo the dearly past away from any harm to the locals, while the story telling comes from villagers having to stay up late that night to “watch” for the wandering spirits. Probably one of histories earlyist recorded cases of widespread insomnia.

    – During Sowin, which was celebrated as the changeover day from summer to winter, a lot of “reading” transpired, since it was believed that on this day, the phantasimorphic veil was the thinest between the spirit world and the tangible world of the entire year, and therefore would be the most accurate. (The Catholics later adopted the day as “All Saints day” just to stay up to date with holidays and such. Nov 2nd was also made “All souls day” (day of the dead), because the Catholics are nothing if not imminently organised, and sensitive to the peasents who were pissed at being left out of things. Both dates honor dead people from that preceeding year, Saints and sinners.)

    – The word “Witch” is from the Druid/Celtic “wicca”, embodied in the form of the black cat, since the animal is nocternal, and by nature withdrawn and sinister.

    – In 1533, with the church falling on hard times, Sowin, along with all of its various spin off days, was adopted as “Halloween” among the general populace of the British Isles, and quickly spread to other Christian based groups/countries.

    – In the “spirit” of these traditions I took the time to do a Tarot reading for you Dan with the following results:

    – You will meet a short dumpy gay guy with a bad skin rash they haven’t identified yet. Nothing will come of it, so to speak, so you will not be obssesed with him for a change.

    – You are not related to Guy fawkes, so whatever he did you do not need to feel guilty about. Native americans and Blacks. Well thats a different matter that pumpkins just don’t ever seem to solve.

    – you need a new blender.

    – The nightmares concerning Favre will stop.

    – Halloween night you will get nicely wasted. St. Paddy will automatically absolve you. Enjoy.

    – Happy Sowin everybody.

  5. alppuccino says:

    I wonder if, in an interview, the interviewer is allowed to ask the interviewee, “Have you banged any corpses lately?”

    Clearly that would be a violation of the prospective employee’s rights, no? I mean c’mon! One dead lady!

  6. McGehee says:

    the night of the walking dead

    Among Democrats, that’s the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November, even-numbered years.

  7. Liz Stephans says:

    Just a quick note to say you haven’t freaked me out (yet). The upside: I upgraded to the new Mac OS. The downside: It apparently doesn’t want to play nice with the software we use to do our show. We’ve been in contact with the software company and hope to have a fix in the next day or so. Thanks for caring enough to notice :)

  8. Dan Collins says:

    Yay! Somebody I haven’t freaked out yet!
    Thanks, Liz. Sorry the Leopard’s being such a bastard.

  9. Dan Collins says:

    With regards to Leopard: I’ve heard it needs to change, in spots.

  10. Nathan says:

    The first story is more evil, but I have to give the creepy nod to door number two. By the way, why on earth would anyone think the kid’s myspace page was relevant?

  11. JD says:

    Liz – You should hesitate in encouraging him/us.

    Dan – can anything be truly creepy without midget strippers, demonic dwarf clowns, and pix of MM being banged by Rosie?

  12. Dan Collins says:

    Show me where I said “truly,” JD.

  13. psychologizer says:

    If the breitbart.tv segments weren’t recorded so incompetently, I wouldn’t watch them on mute. But until they hire a sound engineer, thanks, Liz, for making some of them worthwhile.

    (I won’t stand for this lack of crept?-out-ness, dammit!)

  14. Liz Stephans says:

    Oh but encouraging you is fun … playing with fire, I know!

    Pochologizer — we’re working on the set and sound. This has been a true “beta” for us. We’re in the middle of constructing the set and soundproofing the room…and getting rid of the puke green wall. Hopefully, you won’t wear out your mute button too much in the near future ;)

    Back to broadcasting today — about to do a show in a few. Maybe we should do closed-captioning haha.

  15. JD says:

    No closed captioning needed, Liz. Just more close-ups of you smiling. And less of that dude. In fact, just get rid of him. You have to be tired of carrying him by now.

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