{"id":2779,"date":"2004-08-10T16:21:02","date_gmt":"2004-08-10T23:21:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/?p=2779"},"modified":"2004-08-10T16:21:02","modified_gmt":"2004-08-10T23:21:02","slug":"if-instead-of-a-pampered-heiress-teresa-heinz-kerry-were-a-bounty-paper-towel","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/?p=2779","title":{"rendered":"If instead of a pampered heiress Teresa Heinz Kerry were a Bounty paper towel"},"content":{"rendered":"

THK:<\/b> “What’s that you’ve spilled, Conchita?  It’s not that odious ethnic sal<\/i>sa you people are always eating, is it?  Soiling my Etruscan tile work?”\n<\/p>\n

\nConchita:<\/b>\n<\/p>\n

\nTHK:<\/b> “Conchita?  I’m speaking to you.  I demand to know this instant what you’ve spillthhphtphguhthmumf<\/i> –”\n<\/p>\n

\nConchita:<\/b> “– Aye carumba<\/i>, you really are <\/i>the quicker picker upper, ain’t you Mrs. Señora Heinz Kerry…?”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

THK: “What’s that you’ve spilled, Conchita?  It’s not that odious ethnic salsa you people are always eating, is it?  Soiling my Etruscan tile work?” Conchita: THK: “Conchita?  I’m speaking to you.  I demand to know this instant what you’ve spillthhphtphguhthmumf –” Conchita: “– Aye carumba, you really are the quicker picker upper, ain’t you Mrs. Señora Heinz Kerry…?”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":9196393,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2779","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2779","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/9196393"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=2779"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2779\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=2779"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=2779"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/proteinwisdom.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=2779"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}