July 24, 2004

Scenes from my driveway, continued x 29

Deadbeat neighbor: “I’m gonna run over to McDonald’s for lunch.  Can I bring you back anything?”

Me: “No thanks.”

Deadbeat neighbor: “You’re sure?  A burger, a fish sandwich, freedom fries, strawberry milkshake…?”

Me:Freedom fries, did you say?”

Deadbeat neighbor: “What, no good?”

Me: “That depends.  Are you hoping I’ll slap you?”

Posted by Jeff G. @ 5:45pm

Comments (14)

  1. You’ve got to be kidding.

    Freedom fries would be laughed out of a McDonald’s in New York.

    Actually, I’m surprised that the RNC hasn’t been preemptively laughed out of the city. I mean, the DNC has Boston locked up and has for years (a Repub couldn’t get elected dogcatcher in Mass, except of course, for the governor…), but it’s not like New York is, in general, a conservative-friendly place (with the exception of the upper east side, which is not housing the convention).

    Honestly, I wish I could get out of the city and go somewhere where they sell Freedom Fries. I’d feel safer.

  2. No, not kidding. 

    I even French kiss my wife.  Because I’m a lousy, lousy traitor.

  3. Jeff, why do your blogads find their way into people’s comments, between “Posted by” and their names?

    Or is my browser being sabotaged by Bill Gates, using Ashcroft and Cheney’s special new Halliburton™ mind-control ray?

  4. ��&@eff, why do your blogads find their way

    And I swear I didn’t cuss in my last comment.

  5. I don’t have any idea, to be honest with you.  What browser are you using?

    Also, those weird characters aren’t showing up for me in your original comment.

  6. But when you were talking about the Newsfeed T-shirt, and discussed your personal musky scent, did you then go back and change the work “musk” to a string of incomprehensible characters?

  7. Nope.  I’ve seen these strange characters on occasion, but when I refresh, they disappear.  Another thing I’ll look into, though.

  8. Jeff, if, in your vast amounts of spare time, you can put up a regular link to all the SFMDs, I would be as happy a camper as can be. and I could annoy my family with it to no end.

    ps I like that acronym almost as much as those posts—I want to throw it around in casual conversation, like, “I always knew they would find SFMDs.” of course, some jerk would try to correct me: “That’s SFMD. It’s already plural.”

  9. Hope to collect them all into a little book some day, tee bee.  In the meantime, though, if you do a search for “scenes from my driveway,” you should get a page with all the links.

  10. thanks! when the movie rights are being pursued, make sure you have a say in casting. otherwise, no offense, but you’ll find Will Farrel playing the part of JG.

  11. But you did edit the last line, from “are you trying to get me to slap you?” (itals on the word slap)


    “are you hoping I’ll slap you?” (no itals)

    Or am I going mad?

  12. You are correct, Attila Girl.  Can’t help myself. I will continue to fiddle until I get it exactly the way I want. It’s a disease I have.

  13. Your perogative, but I did miss the itals. The emphasis on “slap” worked well.