November 22, 2008
‘But Mommy! **Updated**

I thought steaks and chicken and turkeys were raised on styrofoam trays covered in plastic!”

WHAAAAAAAAH!!

h/t Cassandra with an extra helping of snark

Ye Gods, to think that all this time, we have been eating animals! Live animals that some … monster had to murder in cold blood before their tender, juicy carcasses magically showed up in neat little shrink wrapped packages down at the local Piggly Wiggly.

Note to the nancyboys at MSNBC: grow some hair on those balls, assuming, of course, you have ‘em and they have actually descended.

UPDATE Mark Steyn

But in this case Sarah Palin was merely indulging in the wearily obligatory annual leaden cutesiness of issuing a gubernatorial pardon to some designated Thanksgiving bird in order to provide the local news shows with their traditional unfunny “funny story” for the “And finally…” closing item. Viewers owe her a debt of gratitude for choosing to perform this dreary ritual in front of a backdrop that entirely undermined it.

Heh.

10 Comments  :::   Post a comment »

  1. Comment by Jeff Y. aka The Continental on 11/23 @ 4:01 am #

    Yeah, but Cassandra is as much a moron as the Daily Telegraph asshats.

  2. Comment by The Sanity Inspector on 11/23 @ 5:23 am #

    And another thing, they’re not turkeys. They’re avian-americans.

  3. Comment by serr8d on 11/23 @ 12:55 pm #

    I haven’t read much Cassandra but I don’t think she’s a moron. There’s some decent satire between those lines of hers, if you know where to look.

    tw writing Owen

  4. Comment by Pablo on 11/23 @ 1:40 pm #

    Cassandra is anything but a moron. She’s just playing one on the internet, in that piece, for effect, hence the “snark” referenced above. That gal can flat out write and she’s entirely sensible.

    Scroll down a little:

    I’d say these people are beyond parody, except for the fact that I just finished mocking them :p

  5. Comment by Jeff Y. aka The Continental on 11/23 @ 8:10 pm #

    Well, I think she’s a man-hating moron. I do agree with her in this piece, though. Even morons will type out something decent every now and then.

  6. Comment by SteveG on 11/23 @ 10:08 pm #

    Ivory tower elites show they have no clue.
    They NEVER get their hands dirty.
    By what process did Obama’s corn beef sandwich appear in the deli? Magic?

    Palin should have turned around and told the guy in the backdrop to “stop playing around with the food”

  7. Comment by SDN on 11/24 @ 1:01 pm #

    Man-hating moron? Hasn’t been my experience with her, and we hold different views on several subjects. YMMV, of course.

  8. Comment by SDN on 11/24 @ 1:16 pm #

    Meanwhile, on the topic, this filksong by Leslie Fish says it all:

    Fisher’s Chant
    Leslie Fish
    ————–

    Chorus:
    Come up, come up, oh sweet thresher shark
    One of us today will die
    One will go down the other one’s throat
    Beneath the pitiless sky.

    The earth is thick with the numbers of men
    The poisoned soil grows cold
    So out we go to the ancient seas
    To fish as we did of old.

    (Chorus)

    The gods made man like any other beast
    For all that his pride denies
    So he must take his turn at the kill
    And all of the rest is lies.

    (Chorus)

    And you who raise tame beasts on the land
    That you march to the slaughterhouse door
    Can point no safe fat finger at us
    Who risk a little bit more.

    (Chorus)

    And you who buy your meat at the store
    Can raise no cry of shame
    For as you pay for the food-beasts death
    You eat, so you share the blame.

    (Chorus)

    And you who feed on nothing but plants
    Don’t hold your pride so high
    For plants are living, and just might feel
    And they take so long to die.

    (Chorus)
    So come to the battle of the jaws and gaff
    At the meeting of sea and air
    We’ll duel for food while the old gods laugh…
    By the gods, this fight is fair!

    Come up, come up, oh sweet thresher shark
    One of us today will die
    One will go down the other one’s throat
    Beneath the pitiless sky, oh
    Beneath the pitiless sky.

  9. Comment by The Sanity Inspector on 11/24 @ 4:22 pm #

    A commenter elsewhere in the ’sphere said that Palin should apologize, and hold her next interview in an abortion clinic.

  10. Comment by memomachine on 11/24 @ 9:23 pm #

    Hmmmmm.

    1. In the case of oysters … -live- animals!

    2. Don’t watch Iron Chef on the Food Network. They routinely chop lobsters and fish alive into pieces.

    3. What a bunch of pussies.

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