From Karol Sheinin, on the 29th anniversary of her plowing into Plymouth rock in a little rickety dingy made out of empty Vodka bottles and the skins of Russian potatoes. Five years later, she’d become a US citizen.
America replies: “Don’t mention it, kid. Just don’t go speeding in school zones and keep the heroin use recreational, and we’ll always be cool.
” — And hey: enjoy the freedom!”

















Comment by Karol on 7/20 @ 1:12 pm #
Haha, thanks America! I’ll keep that in mind.
(BTW, It’s 29 years since I set foot here, I wouldn’t become a citizen for another 5 years. Just clarifying as your version makes me seem older ;-) )
Comment by Attila (Pillage Idiot) on 7/20 @ 1:22 pm #
I love love letters to America. In my case, it was my grandparents who were immigrants to America, but that was the first thing I ever wrote about at my site, before it descended into complete idiocy.
Comment by BJTexs on 7/20 @ 1:31 pm #
Karol:
As the grandson of two sets of Portuguese immigrants I congratulate you on your 29 years. Be assured that we are happy to have you as long as you remember to turn off the lights and stay out of the liquor cabinet. :-)
Comment by Jeff G. on 7/20 @ 1:33 pm #
Fixed it, Karol.
Although I’m not sure if my changes make you seem more heroic or just a young drunk with a dream…
Comment by JD on 7/20 @ 2:21 pm #
A dingy made out of empty vodka bottles – lightweight, sea-worthy, potentially flammable, but oh so fun …
Comment by Pablo on 7/20 @ 2:29 pm #
Prosit!
Comment by JD on 7/20 @ 2:38 pm #
ya lublu pi piva
Comment by Pellegri on 7/21 @ 10:29 pm #
As the kiddo of a Russian immigrant granddad, congratulations, Karol!
(People still have no idea what the heck they’re supposed to do with my patronymic.)
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