February 13, 2007

Zen and the art of motorcycle maintenance, abridged 28

To apply the brakes convincingly, one must, in one’s own mind, be firmly committed to the idea of stopping.  Otherwise, all one is doing is squeezing levers while pretending to respect the immutable laws of physics—a state of being that oftentimes will manifest itself in loud and twisted wreckage.

Posted by Jeff G. @ 7:35pm
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Comments (27)

  1. Generally speaking.

  2. Rented a bike in Galveston and was riding along the seawall, when a lissome chick caught my eye. Swerving not to go over the edge, I applied the hand brakes a little too firmly, and flew over the handlbars. Held on to most of my beer, though….

  3. And waking up to find a plaintiff’s lawyer standing over, you holding out a business card…

  4. On the bright side, one may finally be able to bring a personal perspective to “the sound of one hand clapping.”

  5. But it’s more fun when you’re not committed to stopping!  Until it hurts, anyway.

    Just ask Amanda.

  6. I stop. Therefore I am not moving.

    When I restored my 1962 Austin Healey Sprite, I remember someone ofhandedly telling me to fix the brakes first. Since those are the most important components on the vehicle. You can always make it go, but you might need to stop sometime.

  7. What if there is ice on the road? You want to stop, you are committed to stopping. It just ain’t gonna happen until you hit something else.

  8. Hello, Joe? It’s Nancy again… what?… P-E-L-O-S-I… that’s right, the ‘05 Mercedes. I’ve been having that same problem with the brakes non-binding.

  9. AN OBJECT AT REST CANNOT BE STOPPED!

  10. If that object is on the Earth, is it ever really at rest? Is anything in this universe ever really at rest? If the universe suddenly stopped, would all the potential energy in all objects in the universe suddenly be released?

    My head hurts.

  11. What if there is ice on the road?

    The ice is committed to not being stopped upon. And since its commitment is greater, its will wins out.

  12. Chris:

    I think Squid was channeling the Evil Midnight Bomber What Bombs At Midnight. (“YEAH, baby!”)

  13. Brakes are for pussies.  All they do is slow you down.

  14. If that object is on the Earth, is it ever really at rest? Is anything in this universe ever really at rest? If the universe suddenly stopped, would all the potential energy in all objects in the universe suddenly be released?

    Good question. I ‘m not sure. However, if it does all stop I’m sure it’s because of man made CO2.

  15. However, if it does all stop I’m sure it’s because of man made CO2

    Well, DUH.  Of course.  If an asteroid hits, it will be, too.

  16. …a state of being that oftentimes will manifest itself in loud and twisted wreckage

    …and you are highly unlikely to come out of it with a John Wesley Harding to your credit.

  17. Man made C02! Is there anything it cant do?

  18. “It’s called ice, and it gets a little slick…”

  19. re Patrick Chester:

    WE ARE MAKING GRAVY WITHOUT THE LUMPS!!!!

  20. Bad is good, baby!  Down with government!

  21. I still don’t know how to fix a lawnmoter.  I am not inclined for this stuff.  I just go to the Crawford John Deere Center and they fix it for me.

  22. Well, don’t concentrate on stopping too hard, or you might manifest a bridge abutment.

    Which, true, will stop you, but c’mon…

  23. I am committed to friction.

  24. yes, i know: the jizz is everywhere!

  25. To a mind that is one with it’s surroundings, all else is negligible.

  26. I like this particular article it gives me an additional input in the information a round the world. Thanks a lot and keep going with posting such information.
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