…that, in addition to a bronzed turd, he owns at least 3 life-sized cutouts of L. Ron Hubbard—and refers to Katie Holmes’ breasts unironically as “the majestic mothership.”
Takers?
(h/t Dan Riehl)
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August 31, 2006
I got $50 says…
31 Comments ::: Post a comment »RSS feed for comments on this post. TrackBack URI: http://proteinwisdom.com/wp-trackback.php?p=6867 Leave a commentIf you want to leave a feedback to this post or to some other user´s comment, simply fill out the form below. |
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Comment by Big Paul on 8/31 @ 6:01 pm #
Yeah, I’ll take a piece of that.
Dude, it’s Tom Cruise. He has no interest in Katie’s breasts whatsoever, much less enough affection for them to actually nickname them.
TW: low: It may be, but it’s still true.
Comment by BJTexs on 8/31 @ 6:28 pm #
Ill be a taker as long as I don’t have to wear that ass crazy Travolta costume from “Battleground: Earth.”
BTW: How come that movie didn’t make any of the “gangs of ten.” Huh? What up wit that?
Comment by SPQR on 8/31 @ 6:29 pm #
Dude, Michael Jackson is more interested in her boyish mammaries than is Cruise.
Comment by BJTexs on 8/31 @ 6:30 pm #
OK, Battle *field*; Earth. As if you cared.
Comment by ken on 8/31 @ 6:40 pm #
And if you think this is real (turds from a 19-week old?), I have some prime real estate for sale for you…
Comment by Charlie (Colorado) on 8/31 @ 6:43 pm #
If Tom’s not using them, I’ll take’em….
Comment by ahem on 8/31 @ 6:48 pm #
Okay, I understand. We’re a decaying civilization. Let’s pour fuel on it and just get it over with. Maybe our kids will se a better day.
Comment by B Moe on 8/31 @ 6:55 pm #
I think the Majestic Mothership was what he called the turkey baster.
Comment by Raging_Dave on 8/31 @ 6:59 pm #
Say what? Katie Holmes has a damn nice rack! in fact, if they hadn’t been used by Tom Cruise, I would still want a go at them. But seeing as how they’re all Scientologist now, I’ll have to pass.
TW: doubt. I doubt I could ever enjoy a woman who’s been used by Tom Cruise first.
Comment by BJTexs on 8/31 @ 7:00 pm #
Well at least we know it’s not Brooke Shield’s pharmacy….
Comment by MarkD on 8/31 @ 7:03 pm #
Is “he” Michael Jackson or Tom Cruise?
I’m not sure I want an answer.
Comment by SPQR on 8/31 @ 7:04 pm #
Raging_Dave,
All special effects my friend. All special effects. Outside the makeup trailer and stunt body double, she resembles Hilary Swank at 12 yrs age.
Comment by Sticky B on 8/31 @ 7:13 pm #
The “artist” claims he can get $25-30K for baby shit. Tom’s not the only batshit crazy mufuck in this playpen. Someone ought to track down the halfwit who buys this shit and take up a collection to have them spayed.
TW: sent
I wunt pay a damn red sent fo dat shit.
Comment by natesnake on 8/31 @ 7:24 pm #
It’s a damn shame that Cruise ruined a perfectly good Catholic girl. Fucking midget.
Comment by ken on 8/31 @ 7:39 pm #
I’m not sure the shape they are in now, but they were a damn fine addition to the movie The Gift.
Comment by Charlie (Colorado) on 8/31 @ 7:43 pm #
All special effects my friend. All special effects. Outside the makeup trailer and stunt body double, she resembles Hilary Swank at 12 yrs age.
Then could I have the special effects?
Comment by Meg Q on 8/31 @ 8:05 pm #
Raging Dave:
I bet I can disprove you with two words:
Nicole Kidman.
Unless she’s like, too tall or redheaded or Australian or something for you.
Just saying.
Comment by mojo on 8/31 @ 8:10 pm #
“Why must everybody laugh at my Mighty Sword?”
– Randy Neuman
SB: blood
kin
Comment by Dan Collins on 8/31 @ 9:54 pm #
How the fuck did you get $50, Jeff?
Comment by Dan Collins on 8/31 @ 9:57 pm #
I pooped a Heisman, once. True story.
TW: moral; does it have to have one?
Comment by Rorschach on 8/31 @ 9:58 pm #
Ten bucks says GoldenPalace.com buys it.
…This is the first time in history that anyone can say “I can’t comprehend WHY you paid twenty thousand dollars for that shit!” and mean the entire sentence literally. Not coincidentally, I recall a prophetic Robin Williams line about how Gucci or Louis Vuitton could paint three stripes on a turd and still manage to sell it to someone in Hollywood.
TW: Our STANDARDS are lowering by the day.
Comment by Rusty.No. The other one. on 8/31 @ 10:26 pm #
I got another 50 that says he saves his own pee.
Comment by McGehee on 8/31 @ 11:10 pm #
The Mucinex helped him cough it up.
Comment by steve on 9/1 @ 12:12 am #
That bronze turd is now up to seven grand, just hours after your post. That ain’t shit.
Comment by wishbone on 9/1 @ 1:30 am #
As someone who has changed the first diaper, I’m at a loss as to how one would make a bronze cast of the contents as a stand alone item. The whole diaper maybe, but otherwise I think we don’t have the technology.
Comment by steve on 9/1 @ 2:06 am #
Well, I changed some firsties too (and a lot of subsequent offerings), and I would tend to agree. However the shtick involve here specified “solid” thetan emanation. If you go to ebay and look under Suri’s first poop or something like that you can find it, and there are a couple of pictures. Actually they cheated a little because the turd in a “clear” state comes in two parts ……
Comment by equitus on 9/1 @ 2:27 am #
Yes, a nice rack, I’ll attest.
Don’t you mean “majestic motherships”?
Comment by Skul on 9/1 @ 4:11 pm #
Gives a whole new meaning to the term—“that turd won’t flush.”
Comment by slickdpdx on 9/1 @ 7:08 pm #
I refer to Holmes breasts as The Gift. I see at least one of the earlier commenters shared a similar sentiment.
Comment by Dave on 9/2 @ 2:10 pm #
From the canonical discussion of Katie Holmes performance in The Gift–
Kumar: How were Katie Holmes’ tits?
Goldstein: You know the Holocaust?
Kumar: Yeah?
Goldstein: Picture the opposite of that!
Kumar: Nice!
TW: like. Nah, too easy
Comment by Find customers, distributors on 10/16 @ 3:59 pm #
Turkey Vs. PKK (Bumped and Updated) Wednesday June 06th 2007, 10: