May 2, 2014

Rewind: “my first brief conversation with the ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens”

[Note:  when I posted this back in Oct of 2012, Google asked me to remove it or else give up my Google ads account.  Which, yeah, fuck you, Google.  Anyway, now seems a good time to revisit it. Because one of the many things we’ve never learned from the Benghazi cover-up is the state of Ambassador Stevens’ body; reports surfaced that he’d been sodomized, including with a broomstick handle, but those reports were quickly disappeared in favor of reports on the vile treatment of Muslims by a video depicting them as intolerant and violent.  Which we were told is what caused them to act out violently and intolerantly. Making it a no-brainer to scapegoat the messenger.  As you can probably divine from the “interview,” I was a little pissed at the time.  Still am.  The last few days have only served to remind me just how much – ed.]

me: “Dude…”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “I know. It’s fucked up, right?”

me: “I mean — what can I say? I’m at a loss.”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “It’s okay. It’s not like it’s your fault. But it is messed up. I mean, I knew something was up. The Israelis and MI6 knew something was up. So I kept asking for a step-up in security. And particularly around the anniversary of the 911 attacks. I mean, don’t get me wrong: some of the Libyan people are quite nice. And I’m as tolerant as the next liberal ambassador stuck in some middle eastern hell hole to the cultural peculiarities of the Other. And I try to moderate my Gaze accordingly. But make no mistake. Islamism is the controlling culture there, religiously, politically, as a method of unofficial law enforcement…”

me: “Not as much fun getting stoned in the middle east as, say, a Phish concert, I bet.”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens:

me: “Because, like, dragging out a spliff versus being put in a hole up to your neck and then having sandy people in robes throwing rocks at your skull…”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens:

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens:

me: “Okay, sorry. Point taken. I won’t trivialize it.”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “I’d appreciate that, thanks. After all, I got ass raped. So I’m still a bit raw, emotionally speaking. Not ready for jokes just yet.”

me: “You’re right. I completely understand. Which, by the way, how’s Heaven working out for you?  Assuming, you know…? I’ll rephrase:  What’s it like being dead, if you don’t mind my asking?”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “First thoughts? Well, I’m pleased with the ‘no Islamic dicks pumping into my ass’ part of the new arrangement. And secondly, I can finally get some good sushi again. Couscous, T’ajeen, black tea and Bazin — all that’s okay for about a week. After that, though, you can almost understand why these people are so fucking miserable all the time.”

me: “I look forward to Heaven sushi myself. Or rather, sashimi. Not big on the rice. Too many carbs.”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “Normally I’d be with you. But, you know, it’s Heaven. So starches aren’t going to re-kill you or anything.”

me: “That’s an excellent point.”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “I do miss my family terribly. And I have to say, the ceremony they held for me back at Andrews was a bit too maudlin for my tastes.”

me: “What did you think about Hillary putting the blame on that film maker’s YouTube clip, or the Egyptian consulate essentially apologizing for having inflamed Muslim sentiment to the point where Al Qaeda orchestrated an attack against you in Benghazi, murdering you, dragging you through the streets and, like, you know –”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “Putting dirty dicks in my ass? It’s okay, you can say it. I’m feeling much better now.”

me: “Okay. Well then yes, all that. What did you think when you heard Hillary and the President and Justice all blaming your treatment on the abominable first amendment rights of American citizens?”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “Honestly? I was pissed.”

me: “Because you knew they were covering their own asses — knowing as you did that they had the information in advance, that you’d tried to get beefed up security and DC denied it? Some reports say the Israelis delivered the intel as early as September 4th, for instance –”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “Right. That, and because the Administration and State were blaming the wrong person.”

me: “So you knew it was Al Qaeda?”

ghost of raped and murdered US ambassador to Libya, Christopher Stevens: “Well yeah. But you miss my point. Which is, why weren’t they blaming Bush?”




me: “Do me a favor, will you? When you run into Corey Haim or Brittany Murphy there in ‘Heaven,’ tell’em protein wisdom says ‘hey’…”

Posted by Jeff G. @ 1:30pm

Comments (69)

  1. Couscous, T’ajeen, black tea and Bazin may get old… but if there’s a Heaven.. and I sure hope there is.. my Heaven will include Shish Taouk.. for every meal if I’m lucky.

    On an unrelated note: Have you actually taled to the Ghost of Brittany Murphy? I can’t see her hanging with the likes of Corey Haim.

  2. Speaking of ghosts, notice how it happens that the trolls who used to visit don’t even put in a spirit presence these days? Mere happenstance, surely. Happenstance that is, that their masters are too busy right now attempting to hornswoggle the old talking points to issue new talking points.

  3. Remember how Hillary actually clamed they were carrying him through streets in order to get him to an ER ASAP? Good times (not).

  4. All this Benghazi stuff is distracting us from Harry Reid’s Koch obsession.

  5. Obsession, Darth? Don’t you mean addiction?

  6. For those of you who haven’t seen it, this is the Oct 3, 2012 page from which the post comes. Go look.

    Now what password? I dunno. But maybe someone else does.

  7. My PW password didn’t let me see any comments, despite my (limited) admin privileges.

  8. Password?!? What gives?

  9. What Andrew Breitbart was attempting to do, in one silly picture.

  10. Britanny Murphy god love her

    she was such a good lil pickle

    she added value

  11. love the picture Mr. pallywoozle I put it in with the pictures what rotate on the big screen

    yup i like it that much

  12. The GOP establishment is like the Robert the Bruce of the movies, a wee bit.

  13. that string of pearls that slipped away

  14. The Robert the Bruce of Braveheart in particular. I’m not aware that he’s been depicted in a lot of movies that weren’t mainly about him and therefore more inclined to make him look good. Or (remembering his murder of the Red Comyn in a church) at least more decisive.

  15. – Speaking of Georgie, apparently Bush was closer to the situation room and events that night than Bumblefuck….

    “In addition, House Speaker John Boehner said the chamber would vote next week on creating a select committee to investigate Benghazi.”

    – Bonehead gets dangerously close to doing something…..

  16. when I posted this back in Oct of 2012, Google asked me to remove it or else give up my Google ads account. Which, yeah, fuck you, Google.

    A few years back, Google noticed that I had posted a “kill them all” response to Daniel Pearl getting his head sawed off on camera. They gave me the same piece of shit song and dance. My response was exactly the same as yours.

  17. “….Hannity later asked Woods what he would ask President Obama if he had the chance. He said he would tell the president — as he did in a past letter — to imagine if it were a member of his family who was killed in Benghazi. Woods said Obama responded that he wouldn’t have done anything different if it were a member of his family.”

    – Just hope I live to see the insufferable half black ass’d prick disgraced.

  18. Remember how Hillary actually clamed they were carrying him through streets in order to get him to an ER ASAP?

    I remember that. I also remembering thinking at the time that I didn’t know ME hospitals had resident necromancers because, you know, Ambassador Stevens was so obviously dead at the time.

    Oh, and old news Dems? Fuck you. You either back paged this story, willfully misrepresented it, or simply ignored it completely so that Barky could get reelected. Funny how “mission accomplished” these days means “covering up the rape and murder of 4 Americans” instead of “caught murdering piece of shit tyrant”. I guess that’s some of that tasty nuance which I fail to appreciate.

  19. OT & ATTN bh

    Schadenfreude, or, leftist dweeb gets sapped up the side of the head by the reality he helped create:

    [David] Bonior [D, MI, (1976-2002)] said if he had the power, he would lighten up on pesky regulations.

    “It took us a ridiculous amount of time to get our permits. I understand regulations and .?.?. the necessity for it. But we lost six months of business because of that. It’s very frustrating.”

    source: The American Catholic

  20. Jonah Goldberg writes a simple thing: “The White House was caught off guard — for reasons stemming from both ideology and incompetence — on September 11, 2012.”

    And of course everyone not invested in the sacred worship of the IWonPenPhone regime can see that — has seen it since the event itself, or even before the event itself. Hence the difficulty. Hence too, the worshipers’ resort to lies.

    Yet what a sad and frankly stunning thing that is — September 11th, the least possible date on which to be surprised, “caught off guard” by Islamists!

    This level of stupidity must somehow be the account of all that trashy talk of the “brilliance” of The ClownDisaster prior to his election by the likes of “historian” Douglas Brinkley, or the morons in the press who hang with Charlie Rose.

    It’s a “birds of a feather” kind of deal: these encomiasts to the high quality of ClownDisaster’s mind had instantly recognized someone just like themselves, i.e., a fellow lackwit.

  21. cheap grace reflecting of the nimbus like glo emanating from teh one in all the best photoshop’d icons of the secular messiah.

    Or to speak plainly, anti-christ and his disciples.

  22. Perhaps, if with the proviso that he’s also in political terms the anti-Machiavelli, a near perfect and complete-in-himself fool.

  23. Sfderr,

    Its nothing like that. In fact its been a few months since the UN runner dropped off a packet of marching orders and mandatory talking points from the regional Soros Base. The sad truth is that Protein Wisdom just ain’t as much fun as it used to since 75% of the people vanished and Goldstein started altering comments and banning everyone. Where the hell did Abe Froman and LBascom go, anyway? Nah, the real action these days is on the youtubes. Hosting an all-text blog on today’s nets is like handing out Xeroxed pamphlets at a rock concert. It doesn’t get attention. If you want to know what I mean, scope out these random videos from TJ Kirk aka The Amazing Atheist.

    I probably only agree with 30% of what that guy says but the point is that his videos are interesting. They’re worth linking to and commenting on, unlike this “ghost of Chris Stevens” shlock. That guy, The Amazing Atheist, is younger than Goldstein and has only been putting his stuff out for a few years but his audience is probably 100x the size of Protein Wisdom’s. His vids get over 100,000 views easily. He’s even self-published a few books that sell enough to keep him afloat financially. Where are Goldstein’s videos? Where’s his book? He’s had a decade to write one. If Goldstein was capable of keeping up with the young folks, he’d ask his wife for the money to buy a videocamera and a copy of FinalCutPro so he could enter the modern age. But that likely won’t happen. I fully expect to visit this site in a few years and see more of the same crud that he’s been pumping out for the last ten years or so.

  24. >unlike this “ghost of Chris Stevens” shlock.<

    and val plame was an issue why? or bush firing us attorneys was an issue why? or "mission accomplished" was an issue why?

  25. So…you’re here why, exactly?

  26. baracky has dead bodies – not an issue. bush outs a cia demonrat BIG issue.

  27. And Bush not immediately jumping up and rushing back to AF1 (panicking a room full of elementary kids) on the morning of 9/11/2001 was apparently “dereliction of duty”, but Barry sacking out after debate prep to rest up for that grueling fundraiser in Vegas while American soil is being invaded and his ambassador slaughtered is par for the course, why exactly?

    Inquiring minds want to know, and I eagerly await the YouTube video explaining why the Democrats think trying to find out is a “waste of time”.

  28. I wonder which long-time troll he is?

  29. Squirtle was a Miley sock created to cheer Miley (2nd post ban handle of a supposed Oregon PR research millionaire who got cheaper health care through the exchange) on through the lonely times, obviously inspired by Happyfeet’s avatar.

    I think they’re all just Slippery Slope myself.

  30. correction

    colinbowel et al bush outs a cia demonrat BIG issue.

  31. Oh yeah, I remember the Miley sock guy. I think he also claimed to be a grad student who was enjoying the lavish benefits of Obamacare.

  32. Y these videos no embed?

    Same reason you keep saying the things you do.

  33. “FinalCutPro”

    Heh. Someone’s stuck in 2008 still or he’d have figured out along with the rest of the AV crowd that FCP-X sucks.

  34. Chris Stevens was a primo careerist state department flunky there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t miss him terribly

    vayo con dios my darling Chris and also et cetera plus I’m a go walk out on a pier and drink a beer

    love you man

  35. Make the beer tall and the pier short.

  36. Where are Goldstein’s videos?

    They were on Hot Air at one point. But they were disappeared. In fact, one of them was one of their most watched of all time. I think NR found a copy of it and salvaged it for me.

    When was that, by the way? 2006-ish?

    If you’d really been here all that time, you’d have known that, sockpuppet.

  37. By the way, how many seasons did “Full House” run, anyway? So long as popularity is to be equated with cultural usefulness.

  38. Bob Saget also did that one show with a bunch of guys getting hit in the balls every week. That guy is television gold!

  39. Me?

    I’m here for free Pie à la Mode.

  40. Having one single vid from almost a decade ago is hardly worth mentioning. I’m talking about producing a new video every 1-2 weeks on current issues and hosting them on your own site and Youtube channel so that you’re not dependent on someone else. Own and control your own means of production like Bill Whittle and Steven Crowder. There are 16 year-olds capable of it. You complain constantly that others are depriving you of the success you feel is due through backdoor whisper smear campaigns, disappeared videos, not recognizing your obvious worth, etc. And then you make this idiotic logic-gaffe where you hold up a crappy sitcom as some sort of sneer against popularity itself. It all smells like so many sour grapes. What kind of conservative does that? Either do the hard work necessary to increase the success of your product – or stop whinging about it. Christ Almighty, you sound like some unemployed Brown University poetry double-major moaning that their perverted free verse isn’t bringing them beaucoup bucks because the world is too stupid to see the value of it. That is what we call some weak dick sauce. Do the work. or stop whinging.

  41. Thing is, there was more than one single vid. There were multiple vids. And radio shows. If anything, the problem was that I was too ahead of the curve.

    As for the rest, if you don’t like what I have to say, don’t read it. If you don’t like the medium I use, go find Powerpoint blogs or blogs with bullet points to haunt. I have a life outside this world that includes taking care of kids, which doesn’t leave a lot of time for the video stuff I’d like to be doing. It is what it is. But I hardly need life lessons — or lessons on conservatism — from “squirtlesquirtlesquirtle.” Kind of like going to chess club for lessons on how to bang cheerleaders.

    I may sound to you like “some unemployed Brown University poetry double-major moaning that their perverted free verse isn’t bringing them beaucoup bucks because the world is too stupid to see the value of it,” which is fine by me. Because you sound like an anonymous mutt who pretends that I haven’t produced over a decade of work here and elsewhere — or that I haven’t given the conservative wing of the blogosphere entire now mainstream tropes, both in terms of blog grammar and in terms of philosophical underpinnings on which to build certain forms of argument — while the whole of your contributions to online discourse is being a spotty and not very effective drive-by troll.

    How about you “do the work” and stop believing this “weak dick sauce” of yours is anything other than that. Up your game. The extent of which seems to be inventing ever new names to crawl back in here.

    Really, you just can’t quit me, can you? Don’t sweat it though, you’re just another in a long line of jagoffs who gets obsessed with me.

  42. Damn, I need more popcorn… back in a minute.

  43. It was a three way shot getting the video back up. BT to me to NR.

  44. squirtlecubed, stupidity is NOT a handicap. Park elsewhere!

  45. Thanks, geoff B!

  46. It’s always nice to see Jeff get coached on how to blog by anonymous trolls that don’t even bother trying to blog themselves.

    It’s more than a little pathetic, actually.

  47. Kind of like going to chess club for lessons on how to bang cheerleaders.

    I beg to differ. The chess club isn’t generally full of halfwits. While they would surely lack in capacity for execution, they could probably offer some reasonably worthy theoretical insights into cheerleader mating dynamics. Squirty is more like climbing on the short bus for your cheerleader banging advice.

  48. The short bus is now full of kids who dared brandish a finger gun or publicly pray, and it’s former occupants are in the administrator’s office mistakenly forgetting to filter out the holocaust denial assignments.

  49. it’s-> its

  50. I’ve heard you say that before and I’d be very curious to get a concrete explanation of what ‘mainstream tropes, blog grammar, and philosophical underpinnings’ actually mean. Show me something you did that others copied. Because that sounds like a lot of buzz words and hot air. Does it mean that you were parroting Savage and Levin talking points while your blogpeers were still parroting Limbaugh and Hannity? Or just that you were one of the first to shift the definition of ‘conservative’ from that of a mainstream moral-majority big-tenter to that of an embittered 20%-er who roots for the nation’s collapse from his gun-filled garage? Tell us of these momentous achievements.

  51. Read the archives stupid.

  52. Palaeo, I suspect your advice fails on the first word. This guy must need to have the site read to him by his mother.

  53. Hersheysquirtle’s not a complete idiot – some parts are missing.

  54. Or by the man dressed up in women’s clothing who claims to be his mother…

  55. Oh, and squirtle doesn’t understand the difference between “roots for” and “predicts”. No one “roots for” a building’s collapse, but when “Hope and Changers” start taking pickaxes and sledge hammers to the load-bearing walls on the bottom floor, the outcome is easy to foresee.

  56. 9/11/2012, what did your president do today?

    The success of the “Arab Springmetastasizes.

  57. I don’t owe you an explanation, leftist. History is what history is. Your revisionism and denial don’t interest me. Nor do you.

    And Drumwaster is right: people like me aren’t “pro-war”, “pro-collapse,” “anti-woman,” “pro-dirty air and water,” etc. And anyone who even pretends to believe such a thing is either a moron or a lying sack of shit. I suspect you’re a bit of both.

    Recognizing and preparing does not mean hoping or rooting. I recognize the path we’re on and I’m preparing for the worst while hoping for the best — though I’m also enough of a realist to understand that hope isn’t really a plan. That’s on the useful idiots who thought they could earn some cheap grace by voting for a black dude because he’s “historic”.

    And rather than sitting around a barstool bitching about it every day, I try to make the case on a public forum that is available to anyone with an internet connection. That I’m well-read, and a former academic, is what really pisses you off, which is why people like you go to such great lengths to try to marginalize people like me (and others here) as gun-hoarding rednecks living in the sticks. You know deep down that I’m not only smarter than you, but I’m more culturally rounded and a helluva lot more interesting, to boot. And that has to sting.

    Remember: you troll me.

    There’s some college money well spent!

  58. Yep, just some empty buzzwords and hot air. And have you noticed that everything you claim to have done is in the far past, like those decade-old quotes on your front page? Former academic. Blogger grammar pioneer circa 2002. Ex-videoblogger. Retired Little Rascal and ex-Mouseketeer. Perhaps you ought to work on some new achievements. Wouldn’t you like something frm this decade to point to? Something that brings in $$$$ perhaps? It might be a good move.

  59. You still seem to think that your opinion holds any weight here (unlike your shadow). You demand that he produce something recent, yet you have nothing on your own side of the ledger to show.

    How about you show us why anyone, much less the owner of the blog you ohsogleefully befoul with your petty puling, should give you anything other than the contempt and abuse you so richly deserve? What have YOU done lately? Hell, my own eponymous blog, years in the past, is at least an accomplishment, while all you have is “GIMMEGIMMEGIMME”.

    Put up or shut up.

  60. Jeff, I think the squirt wants you to throw yourself to the ground at his feet, weeping for how pointless your existence is — compared, of course, to all the books, videos, essays and comedy tropes he has never created.

    Obviously therefore, he is better than you, and you’d better acknowledge it!

  61. “Yep, just some empty buzzwords and hot air.”

    No. dumb ass. Seriously read the archives. They answer your ginned up horse shit “challenge” questions far better than your lame pretense at slyly substantive criticism. Your being fucking ignorant is not a coup you pulled off. It’s just you not knowing some basic shit and then babbling on anyway hoping someone as ignorant as you will take the babbling seriously.

    You can’t hope to shake someone’s confidence in what they wrote and the impact they had merely by lazily and generally name dropping Michael Savage, like that will magically identify you as an expert in what conservatives thought and wrote across the last decade and a half. Come off it. You’re an obvious outsider who exhibits no competency with any significant shibboleths and that makes you a hilariously ineffective bluffer.

  62. One of the many things about Islam that some have no problem with.

    On Monday, Boko Haram leader Abubakar Shekau admitted that his group is responsible for the kidnapping of over 200 girls from Chibok, Borno State last month, and said that he plans to have them sold on the market.

    “I abducted your girls. I will sell them in the market, by Allah,” Shekau, said in the video translated by CNN.

    “There is a market for selling humans. Allah says I should sell. He commands me to sell. I will sell women. I sell women.”

    Restocking taking place nightly.