April 28, 2014

“Alaskan Polar Bears Threatened…By Too Much Spring Ice”

Formerly, they were threatened by disappearing ice. It’s all part of the unified theory of global climate change: all weather is harmful to something, and when it isn’t, that’s just the weather telling denialist lies.

Honestly. If even those environmental stewards with their hearts in the right place aren’t embarrassed by the refusal of supposed climate scientist alarmists to debate the data — not their own faulty modeling — on global climate change and the supposed anthropocentric cause thereof, then they, too, are nothing but preening useful idiots.

It’s surreal, almost. The screeching by alleged scientists (and tin pot autocrats like ObiWon) that the “debate is over” simply because the transnational progressives looking to remake the world through wealth redistribution insist it is, how does that not cause rational people to point and giggle and refuse to play along?

Posted by Jeff G. @ 12:34pm

Comments (48)

  1. My experience with polar bears is that they are mean and smart and unlikely to roll over and play dead very easily.

  2. Not to forget the tin horn plutocrats.

  3. Formerly, they were threatened by melting ice. It’s all part of the unified theory of global climate change: all weather is harmful to something, and when it isn’t, that’s just the weather telling denialist lies.

    That’s why all the cool kids are calling it Climate Breakdown or Climate Vandalism these days…

  4. how does that not cause rational people to point and giggle and refuse to play along?

    It does.

    Which tells you all you need to know about “climate vandalism” supporters.

  5. it is really Climate Indifference. The rain really does not care if it is your wedding day.

  6. Oh oh oh, what a coincidence, I just now finished a gif on global climate. It combines all the graphs of all all the best thinkers on the subject into one single easy to grasp visual aid. Even for resolute partisan dummkopfs.

  7. Really, this can’t get any more absurd. They can’t write comedy this good in Hollywood anymore.

  8. They can’t write comedy this good in Hollywood anymore.

    All the good ones have passed on and now they’re writing God’s material.

  9. how does that not cause rational people to point and giggle and refuse to play along?

    Scientists, you mean? Because threats to their research funding, and threats of alienation from ‘insider’ scientist’s social scene: no more invitations to ‘proper’ social events that they’ve already dressed for (that may or may not result in some bumping of lab coats under the fume hoods).

    But mostly because their funding dries up if they don’t kowtow to what’s been properly predetermined as CORRECT! because now-highly-politicized SCIENCE! says so. Al Gore, Chief f’n Authoritah in Charge.

  10. Watch what you say. Now we know why the EPA has their own SWAT teams.

  11. How about just short circuiting her threats? Heh. Oh, wait. That’s the SWAT lookout to start with.

  12. the science propaganda is settled

  13. the science propaganda is settled

  14. this is all part of the marketing campaign for the dvd release of Frozen I think

  15. From geoffb’s link:

    “Environmental Protection Agency administrator Gina McCarthy has issued a warning to Republicans who continue to question the integrity of the agency’s scientific data: we’re coming for you.”

    “McCarthy told an audience at the National Academy of Sciences on Monday morning the agency will go after a “small but vocal group of critics” who are arguing the EPA is using “secret science” to push costly clean air regulations.”

    I think Ms. McCarthy has her roles confused. Would love to see Trey Gowdy have her “come for him”.

    Somehow, impeachments have to start soon!

  16. Somehow, impeachments have to start soon!

    And yet (though I concur wholeheartedly), somehow we know that they will not.

  17. she wants to finger-bang her some girl scouts, this Gina McCarthy

    I saw a picture on the internet

  18. Haz that paederast glint to her eye does she?

  19. impeachment is never the answer – teary eyed orangething

  20. Well placed Dicey lady!

  21. I understand there are more polar bears now than there were many years ago. If the polar bears are hungry, why don’t some of those progressives who are part of the human extinction movement volunteer to be polar bear food?


  22. this is all part of the marketing campaign for the dvd release of Frozen I think

    I got the DVD from Netflix so it’s already OUT. Shows what YOU know.

  23. I don’t feel comfortable with letting my small son be in the care of a transexual cub scout leader. I wouldn’t mind if it were three gay guys all married to one another taking the scouts camping, or a transvestite or someone way into S & M. I guess I’m okay with the homosexual man taking him camping. Pretty sure. Willing to take that risk, I guess.

    This is where I trace the line carefully through the sexual psychologies and my son’s care, and anyone who traces the line differently from mine is a bigot and a fascist. At Whole Foods today I met a guy who was totally fine with his son having a gay guy for a scout leader but not with three gay guys who were married to one another. So I screamed in his face and mocked him with a Nazi salute. I think he got the message about how wrong he was.

    If the marriage were as many as five or six gay guys, I wouldn’t go that far. I think that’s not healthy and wouldn’t want my child under their care.

  24. I never did see Frozen. I went to go see Planes to see if I would still enjoy that kind of thing, but nope. Not really. I just slightly creeped out the few parents and kids who were there. ( I was spending a day off at the movies to shed some movie passes.)

    Honestly ever since the first five minutes of Up! harshly sucker punched me I’ve been reluctant about big ticket kids movies.

  25. Be careful with that Judginess, Jim. I’m sure you’d hate to be judged by those same standards ;^)

  26. Paleo,

    The new Peabody and Sherman wasn’t bad. It had an awesome jab at one of our former President’s

    (Hint: it had to do with Pardons)


    (she likes to party)

    (all the time)

  28. Well I just had to de-goblinize my twitter account. Somebody was signing me up to follow a lot of spammy shit much of which I could not even read. New password, checks before a password reset/change are allowed, and I dumped a lot of apps that had access to my account.

    What a stupid service.

  29. followeth not the spammy shit, of which thou canst e’en read

  30. It’s worse than we thought (TM).

    I liked the gif, bour3, but the Interglacial Denialists will not be affected by it.

  31. Putin’s causing Barky to drool yet again…

    Russia’s Federation Council has passed the bill introducing obligations for maintainers of popular blogs, roughly similar to the existing rules for mass media.

    The new bill introduces a definition of ‘blogger’ to Russian legislation. Popular blogs, defined as those that have 3,000 or more visitors per day, will have to register on a special list maintained by the consumer rights agency Rospotrebnadzor, and follow certain rules.

    The authors will have to sign the posts with their real name and verify the information they publish. They will also be banned from posting extremist and terrorist information, propagating pornography or violence, and disclosing state or commercial secrets and personal data of citizens. Popular bloggers will not be able to use obscene language and will face some other restrictions, such as a ‘day of silence’ ahead of elections. …

    The bill also introduces a special legal term for social networks, blog platforms and any sites with readers’ comments. They are called “distributors of information on the internet” and also face obligations to register with Rospotrebnadzor, store the user-generated content and logs of user activity for six months, and present the data to the state watchdog upon request. Refusal to comply will be punished by fines

    Here, we simply have bloggers carefully watched, and if they become troubling to Government, the IRS comes calling.

    And don’t forget the helpful plants what are planted to salt the comment fields.

  32. On polar bears: The biggest threat to Polar Bears is that they aren’t delicious and don’t make Chinese dicks hard.

    On Scouts: I spent this weekend camping with my sons and the scouts and there are some major problems with the new kids coming up. Someone has decided that the scouts is a good place to “socialize” their fucked-up kids. Out of seven new scouts, three have developmental delays and two need their mommy’s and daddy’s to smack them around or I swear, next campout will be injun-style. See how they handle their new SPL and ASPL, both of whom have three brothers, no tents and the “leaders” engrossed in a very competitive Euchre tournament in the Winter Cabin. It’s not just that I don’t want to walk your twelve year old infant to the “rest room” in the middle of the night because he needs a light on when he pees, and I don’t, but I actually CAN’T. It’s against the RULES! I can’t be alone with a kid. ANY kid. EVEN MY KIDS. I’m only there to call 911 and break up fights… and play euchre. Also, the most badass scout I know is also a flaming queer (his description, not mine. I’d call him a heine-stabbing butt pirate), and he is of the opinion that all those bent-nosed queens upset about the scouts should just shut the fuck up because scouts is NOT ABOUT SEX! Aside from “that’s what she said” jokes, sex isn’t supposed to come up. Don’t act the mary and no one will care. Most of these kids are between eleven and sixteen (scouts who can drive are a rare breed, make Eagle a condition on the driver’s license), and shouldn’t be fucking anyway. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGH!

    End rant.

  33. Also, polar bears are adaptable, and one of the most dangerous carnivores on the planet. The only reason they’re not killing and eating as many humans as leopards are is that apparently seals are more tasty, and people are sorta scarce where they like to hang out.

    Other than that, though, they are fragile little flowers teetering precariously on the brink of extinction.

  34. ” Other than that, though, they are fragile little flowers teetering precariously on the brink of extinction.”

    Heh. As is all life on this mudball. One nicely placed asteroid or solar flare could shuffle the eras yet again.

  35. Meteoroids fall with alarming frequency on the Canadian Shield; if the next Big One falls there, it’s probably game over for the polar bears.

    If not, though, the bastards should survive the aftermath fairly well. There’d be plenty to eat, for a while.

    An ocean strike would probably result in the vaporization of a few cubic miles of water; that plus pulverized mantle thrown into the atmosphere might result in what the anti-nuke people dreaded. Glaciers. That might shift the polar bear population South some. Not sure what it would do to their available coastal area. They like ice, but they need open-ish water to kill them some seals.

  36. Anyone know if polar bears fart more or less than cows? Because the same people telling us to eat vegan because livestock flatulence is killing the planet are crying crocodile tears over the polar bears.
    – – – –
    Side note: That Gina McCarthy at the EPA sure sounds bossy, eh?

  37. “Other than that, though, they are fragile little flowers teetering precariously on the brink of extinction.”

    You mean like this little guy (RIP)?

  38. Won’t someone make polar bear rugs – for the sake of the ring seal children?

  39. Hey guys, back off, they are mean but, they are still bears. Besides, do you really want a white rug?

    That said, as cranky-d pointed out the populations are up and in true lefty style I hear folks going on about an increase in the number of dead polar bear sightings. Well, duh, more live polar will eventually lead to more sightings of dead polar bears. Do the math.

  40. Hey guys, back off, they are mean but, they are still bears. Besides, do you really want a white rug?

    I am reminded of a colleague who, on seeing me picking pigeons off the roof at work with the air rifle. He asked me if I would do him a favour and rid him of some pesky Herring Gulls that were depredating a breeding colony of (not so common) Common Gulls near him. I like to think of these situations as the Charismatic Species Olympics. Unfortunately for him, the Herring Gull has been recategorised from common shitehawk of landfill and rubbish tips, to endangered at sea, so it is now as charismatic at the Common Gull.

    Ring seals, or polar bears? Which is cuter?

  41. Don’t get me started on white bear privilege

  42. That, sir, was well played.

  43. Good point. White bear definitely has the power in most relationships.

  44. Polar bears estivate. They hibernate in the summer.
    Just puttin it out there.

  45. But do they emilio-estivate?

  46. When conservatives resist change, they’re reactionaries. When so-called liberals do it, they’re environmentally conscious.

    So. These things mean the same thing, really.