February 16, 2014

It must be Sunday [Darleen Click]

The WaPo is running yet another insufferable piece of self-absorption to demonstrate how cool they are, unlike you insular, heteronormative rubes in the sticks.

When you don’t look like a typical girl — or feel like an average boy — there are few more confusing places than the gym.

Yet, even in an ostensibly liberal, open-minded city such as Washington, gender policing abounds. The gym is the place where people work out to become more like the skinny, toned women or perfectly muscular men in advertisements. Women do cardio to shed unwanted pounds, and men pick up free weights to groan and stare in the mirror at their reflections — frantically working to become ideal models of their respective genders.

I identify as “genderqueer” — blurring the line between man and woman. For example, I love my masculinity, and trying to get big at the gym is just one of my avenues for expressing it. I appreciate my femininity, too, particularly my ability to access vulnerability and express emotions freely. Calling myself genderqueer is about gender fluidity, not necessarily about sexual orientation. It’s about expressing a more authentic self. Existing in the gray area, I feel less confined by false notions of how I “ought” to be. [...]

I was the kid who longed to be in the Boy Scouts just as much as any other boy in my class. I had already come up with lots of ideas about how to build the fastest, coolest pinewood derby car, and I desperately wanted to earn a Wilderness Survival badge. But instead I had to practice cooking and learn dance routines in the Girl Scouts. In all of the pictures from those days, I am wearing a serious frown. [...]

Sitting on my bench, I see myself reflected in the crotch-scratching jocks around me. I’ve learned to adapt to this masculine culture that encourages me to take up as much space as I can in order to assert my existence. The degree to which I unabashedly take my time as I perform my fourth set of skull crushers warns others to back off my territory.

It is a strange experience for someone socialized as a girl — taught to always ask for permission, to say “please,” “thank you” and “excuse me.” Here, in this sacred zone, I shed 25 years of indoctrination. My “pleases” and “thank yous” turn into “this is mine” and “move over.”

Strangely, enforcing “please” and “thank you” with my grandsons is no different than what I expected from my daughters.

We all transgress gender norms. For some of us it is in big ways — boys wearing fabulous pink dresses or someone transitioning to a gender different from the one a doctor assigned at birth. For others, transgression can be modest: the man who takes pride in being a great cook or the woman who changes the oil in her husband’s car.

Wow, who knew Chef Gordon Ramsey was a gender transgressor!

Ms. Cory is transcending sexual stereotypes, how?

Sheesh.

Posted by Darleen @ 12:45pm
19 comments | Trackback

Comments (19)

  1. “I pick things up .. and I put them down”

  2. hoochie is overthinking it I think

  3. I want everyone who is straight to take to the airwaves and to print and declare their heteronormative bad selves.

    Naturally, this will take much longer and will be, like, totes unfair since there we outnumber the not heteros by >98%.

  4. So, one is not polite in the gym, but is instead, apparently, an asshole. That has not been my experience.

    People who tend to identify with a gender other than their biological one tend to express that as caricatures of reality, in my experience, both the drag queens and bull lesbians (or whatever they are called).

  5. i’m sensing pervert microaggression

  6. Macroaggression from this corner, nr. I’m sick of hearing a panoply of Who’s Gay Today? In particular are the “brave” movie stars and singers who out themselves. Who the fuck cares? They aren’t exactly working behind enemy lines in show business.

  7. “…. gender different from the one a doctor assigned at birth.”

    I always figured that was trumped by being either XX or XY.

  8. The word “heteronormative,” containing nothing referencing sex, means only a diversity of norms — and therefore is self-annihilating.

    Same with “homophobia,” which rightfully means the same as “oikophobia” and therefore implies (for example) heterosexuals who are irrationally afraid of other heterosexuals.

  9. For someone who claims to she is working out to bulk up, Marion has even less definition in her arms than I have in mine. And, due to health issues, I no longer work out.

  10. I identify as “genderqueer”

    Fellow forgot his full:stop colon in the middle of all that.

  11. Transgenderism is the new racism with the Proggressive braindead Left. They don’t transcend their obsessions, they waller in them and achieve mental parralysis by over analysis.

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  13. I identify as “genderqueer” — blurring the line between man and woman. For example, I love my masculinity, and trying to get big at the gym is just one of my avenues for expressing it. I appreciate my femininity, too, particularly my ability to access vulnerability and express emotions freely. Calling myself genderqueer is about gender fluidity, not necessarily about sexual orientation. It’s about expressing a more authentic self. Existing in the gray area, I feel less confined by false notions of how I “ought” to be….

    Christ, we’re the Goddamn Roman Empire as it fell.

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  15. I read that, wincing the entire time. I expected an article that dealt with a general problem with alienation. What I got was a great humblebrag regarding how thorougly this stereotype-busting “genderqueer” has managed to set her/whateverself apart from the rest of us.

    Not that no one could ever be taken aback by a female/whatever with uncommon upper body strength, but really. She/whatever is not the first non-conventionally-male person to have strength and ability. It’s just self-indulgent ain’t-I-special crap.

    “I self-identify as” kind of makes me throw up in my mouth a bit, to be honest. It’s almost a guaranteed precursor of oversharing.

  16. “a doctor assigned at birth”?

    Who knew doctors were so powerful?

  17. ironpacker, serr8d, full stop indeed, it is where I stopped for I identify as completely 100% bored to death with someone else’s sex when it does not involve me directly. I had to resurrect myself just to say this.

    Except this one time I saw a porn of a guy with two identical dicks screwing a porn chick with both of them. It was real. That was interesting and didn’t involve me. And another time I read a book called the Raptor about the visigoths vs ostrogoths and the dispute between them turned out to be a matter of Christian canon, virgin birth or something, but the main character is a hermaphrodite that uses dress changes to advances through society by one catastrophe to another, by growing up a sexual perv and the trouble he/she gets up to, a very interesting book that brings the time alive, for example, by making it clear the things you can buy with one gold dinar, how that translates to silver coins and what kind of things can be done with that kind of money when one is resourceful at the time of dissolution of Roman Empire, and that was sexually perverse and interesting and did not involve me. So two things.

  18. It’s astonishing that all this talk about sex and sexual identity has done the impossible: Made sex a crashing bore.

  19. Typical leftist idiot. A doctor did not assign you a gender at birth, your sex was imposed on you when a sperm fertizied an egg as part of sexual reproduction of the species known as homo sapiens. It is anti-science to claim that one can have a sex other than what one’s genetic make-up is.

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