June 3, 2005

The “Michael Jackson reflects on his life as he awaits the jury verdict” poem

for Diana Ross

You know, I’m really

beginning to regret the

whole stupid one glove

     thing, Bubbles.

And all that drunken

little boy sex?  Man,

what a PR disaster that’s

     turned into…

Posted by Jeff G. @ 8:02pm

Comments (27)

  1. Q: Why are Michael Jackson’s pants so short?

    A: They’re not his.

    Q: When’s bedtime at Neverland Ranch?

    A: When the big hand is on the little hand.

  2. Q:  Why did the elephant stand on the marshmallow?

    A:  He was afraid he’d fall into the hot chocolate.  Where Michael Jackson would be, dressed in silk and trying to bang little boys.

  3. Q: What is black and white and red all over?


    It just writes itself…

  4. Q:  What’s the hardest part of a fruit to eat?

    A:  His chaps.

    Nothing to do with Michael Jackson. Just thought I’d try it out here before I sold it to Percifield.

  5. Q: What do Michael Jackson and cavier have in common?

    A: They both come on crackers.

  6. Hey, just let Percifield have the joke for free. Later, after he uses it, start grumbling withmiffed indignation.

  7. Man, if I had a dime for every blogger who used my phrase “indigent little crust-coated pipe smokers” to describe short homeless people who like to fellate men for Ripple money…

  8. Knock, knock.

    Who’s there?

    Little Boy Blue.

    Little Boy Blue who?

    Michael Jackson.

  9. Q: Why did Michael Jackson go to Walmart?

    A: He heard boys’ pants were half off.

  10. Jeff, I don’t think they like to fellate men for Ripple money.  I’m sure they have a lot of guilt, but hey, ya gotta feed the bulldog, right?

  11. Q: What did the lady lying on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

    A: Would you mind getting out of my sun.

  12. Q: What’s the difference between a junkyard and Neverland Ranch?

    A: One’s a dangerous place where you shouldn’t let children play, and the other’s a junkyard.

  13. Q: What’s black on the inside, white on the outside and comes in little cans?

    A: Michael Jackson

  14. Michael Jackson’s favorite song?

    “I’m Forever Blowing Bubbles.”

  15. Craig, you clearly meant to say “feed the Mad Dog 20/20”. That Bulldog stuff is a little pricey for homeless people.

  16. What’s the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?

    One’s white, made of plastic, and isn’t safe for children to play with, and I’m sure you know the rest because you’ve heard this joke so often, which just happens to be the Turing word.

  17. Has anyone even CONSIDERED that it was the BOY who got Jackson drunk? No, of course not! Because you racist pigs can’t STAND to see a black man with money!

    What kind of world do we live in, when a conniving little gold digger can daterape a cultural icon and then SUE the man for the pleasure? Not the kind of world our founding fathers intended! No sirree! That little skank needs to be dealt with by the LAW!

  18. Q: Why does Michael Jackson disappear for a couple hours after one of his little

    friends leaves?

    A: It takes that long to get the bubble gum off his xxx.

  19. I have quit YouTube and will be committing ritual suicide online.
    The Rock Star life is just too much for me.
    Here is my farewell video:


  20. R.I.P King Pop. you were the greatest innovation of the music

  21. I really miss Michael Jackson. He is truly the greatest pop singer of the century. Farewell king of pop..

  22. there is no doubt that Michael Jackson is the best ever pop music artist of the Centruy~~:

  23. i will really miss the King of Pop. michael jackson is truly the best pop artist in this lifetime.`~.