BREAKING: SHEP SMITH SCOURING STATEN ISLAND FOR CANNIBALS
So far he’s been unsuccessful — he’s finding lots of misery, property damage, dislocation, power outages, and the sort of thing you’d find after any kind of major national disaster in a city perhaps too reliant on government services for cleanup, but as of yet no Staten Island natives squatting ape-like over the carcasses of their fellow Islanders, sawing off chunks of flesh with the lids from empty tuna cans and roasting the meat over smallish electrical fires — but he’ll keep looking, because that’s his job.
But the truth is, Shep knows that this is no Katrina, and that things like cannibalism and federal government indifference to natural devastation only happen when Republicans are in office — BUSH! for example — regardless of whether or not those administrations pretend to care by, say, sending in the National Guard or immediately signing off on aid to a devastated region or deferring to the state’s governor.
So yes, while people are suffering all over New York and New Jersey, and the governmental response thus far seems, beyond a number of press interviews, a helicopter tour, and some photo ops, to be scattershot and ineffective, there is at least one significant difference between how the Obama administration and the Bush administration handled Hurricanes Sandy and Katrina respectively: namely, Obama doesn’t hate black people. While it was clear Bush did, as Shep was able to document in a number of gut-wrenching and hard hitting reports. And this non-hatred of blacks by Obama is precisely why the urban poor aren’t eating each other in alleyways in Staten Island, while in New Orleans, the Superdome was filled with snacking, gore-soaked refugees from Bush’s racist indifference.
I know, because Shep Smith was on the scene then to detail the horrors of Katrina. While today? It’s possible that, real soon, the trains will run on time — and that a spirit of bipartisanship has so overtaken the very atmosphere that both New York and New Jersey (did not Chris Christie’s suspension of partisan rancor and obeisance toward the Won not bring a tear to your eye?) will heal almost magically.
And this is the takeaway: The nightmare of Katrina is being washed away by the collectivist efforts to reclaim NY and NJ from Hurricane Sandy — which is only possible with a President who doesn’t hate black people and who will not in any way politicize the storm.
I know, because that’s what the media is telling me. And I believe everything the media says because I’m not some fringe kook who sees leftwing bias in every last oversampled poll or Soledad O’Brien interview.